Sunday, October 28, 2007

Did you hear the one about the man who remained silent only to be heard?

The whispers are only for myself, and I repeat them often enough to know them all by heart. The truth, I held it under my tongue and prayed...all the while losing my hold on the meaning. Now my words are bent and broken from the release. Questionable promises have crumbled in my fist, and what remains is dry and falls through my fingers. It crashes to the ground in small piles, which I blend back into the earth with my shoe. I grab a handful and press it against my lips; it is rough against my cheek. And I am reminded of where it all began.

p.s. what has changed is mistaken for truth without question.

2,853 comments:

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sister midnite said...

Nite, Entropy! ^_^

ergoproxy said...

night SisM toujours

soulconnector said...

Mayonaise,
Why do I always get the impression you want to learn everything the hard way....
and only in this suffering are you able to accept and believe you deserve all the good that has possibly come your way.

It appears to me,that you like to be the saver,rather than the savee.The leader,rather than the follower in all you do.

Still,doesn't someone need to learn to follow,before they can truly lead?

Maybe,just for tonight..listen to the sound of the bells in the distance.
Acceptance is ringing here for the man,maybe just not for all of his decisions and actions.

It is good,you do go back and feel,smell,taste the dirt.Now,there is a higher demand for it,thus giving the impression,it is of better quality,but really it is the same dirt.

I believe,it is what we do with it,that may have a possible impact on others.

Here is my dirt to take or leave;
MCR may sing,Famous Last Words, but i have lived it....
by choice and circumstance,I have walked this world alone;physically,mentally and spiritually for more than 20 years.

At times,others were briefly present but I still was not truly living my own life and sharing it equally with someone.

Sometimes,this needs to be done to break a destructive family cycle.
`sc

Anonymous said...

Dear, Dear Mayo, pull your head out of the sand.

As you get older, you do start to think about things you did when you where young.

When your in your youth, you are lead by others, and you listen with opens ears and hold on to the dream they say is your dream.

You have fun, cause someone else is making all the big decisions, they make it easy for you, and you become accustom to that way of life.

But slowly, ever so slowly, you grow, change and evolve, into who you want you to be.
No wonder you find life a little crowded now.

Mayo, i get it, i really do!
You ask "what is life on your own"

What is life with out so many people there to whisper in your ear.

What is it like to say what you want, with out someone ready to stop you in mid sentence.

What is it like to live with out the lies, just one day to just be you.

It's time to say " To hell with what other people think or want.

What is in the past is past, youth holds no rules, no regrets, no blame, its apart of your life and its what got you where you are now, say a sad farewell, dig a grave, bury it, cry for it, and let it go.

Time is right for change, only you know your heart, do not look to others for advice, you know what you want, you have for a long time now.

It's time to hear your own voice, and its time you lessen, to what you have to say.

we are born alone, and we die alone, its the in between that matters the most, ask yourself " what do i want?"
Because until you answer that, you can not live, only live your life as a lie.

Goodnight, Dear Mayo
sweet drams.

Anonymous said...

To make sure you all understand this, there are two (may be three)? anons posting here about what we're seeing. I'm not any one who can go up to Gerard and just talk to him, I'm outside his circle, a mere ant to him. But to answer a few questions.

Brian is kind of out of the picture or at least not on the scene. he doesn't have as much power as people think.

Eliza was pushy and bitchy but she tried to help Gerard. Look where it got her. Yeah she did a lot of things wrong in their relationship. But the one thing she tried to do right gets her publicly humiliated.

Why don't people jump in and try to help? Some people are afraid they'll lose him forever and then they REALLY won't be around to help him. It's precarious because when they're not on tour they don't see each other too much and he will shut them out totally. Some think it's better to not get shut out and try a "gentle" approach or just "be there". Some have thrown their hands up in disgust. Mostly its because you can't help an addict until he asks you to.

Anonymous said...

Oh and if you're wondering if I have anything to gainby saying anyof this I don't. Maybe only one thing. I hope, truely hope that Gerard reads this and maybe he'll know that some people KNOW what's going on, he can't hide it from the world forever, and it will force him to think about it.

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, no one can help him now.

He does not listen, and cuts people out. The only thing that motivates an addict to change is either to be sick of feeling that way and hitting rock bottom, losing everything or immense public humiliation.

Maybe he needs all three. There's only one catch - the person who shares his life, major problem. And he thinks he is in control.

You cannot place this sort of responsibility on his band mates, management or family. This is hard for them as well. And they have to make him fall, it's the only way for him to pick himself up.

It's very sad but this all needs to come out and not be hidden.

farawaysoclose said...

well fuckin hell!
a whole load of shit went down last night!!
i wasn't gonna read it all but then i saw sister midnite's comment at 6.17am and so felt compelled to!!
jesus!
regarding gerard my thoughts on whats going on with him change daily. i really don't know??
and to the anons who have been saying he's drinking/using again, no disrespect but you could be anyone fooling around and leading everyone else on a merry dance. the thing is we don't know for sure. we don't know anything for sure and until something happens that really proves he's gone back to his old ways, i'm just gonna keep trying to feel positive about it all.
shit though i've got that crappy feeling going on again which i hate!

Anonymous said...

Frank's exact words:

"I mean it was Gerard. We would have given him a million chances." But what people often overlook is that he said those words during a time when Gerard was sober. In the same interview he also said (in reference to one of Gerard's drunken and botched performances), "After that show, I wanted to put down my guitar and leave. And I've never felt that way about playing."

Frank has played the role of enabler for a long time. Always willing to step in and clean up the messes with a smile on his face. But he's getting weary of it. A million chances? An exaggeration, to say the least. I can honestly tell you that Gerard's chances are numbered and they are running out fast.

Without Frank, the crumbling facade that is My Chemical Romance will most certainly tumble to the ground.

Anonymous said...

Frank, Ray and Bob, you are professional musicians.

You will survive this, even if it is not in this band.

I support you all the way.

Just don't let yourselves get dragged down into this shit any longer.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sdock10 said...

Mayo,

How are you today? I'm feeling quite manic and out of my head this morning. Should I run off laughing hysterically or sit quietly while I plot my revenge? Not quite sure...too early to tell. Caught in the middle of war....devils on one side, angels on the other....Do I have to choose a side or can I stand firmly right where I am? Fighting this battle just the way I want to....the way it has always been...right by my fucking self.....Might be to my benefit to play one side against the other...hmmmm?

Hope your day turns out better than you could have imagined and you spend it laughing, smiling, and loving.

Just a word of advice. When the tray gets passed your way tonight, try not to over indulge. It only gets you numb for awhile. And if you are still awake when the sun comes up, it makes for a pretty shitty rest of the day.



Love to You always,
S (personality# 3,447)

p.s. And I made this mess, I built this fire....

JocelynHolly said...

Goodmorning everyone.

After reading some of last nights comments. Fuck. I started crying when I read some of them. Why? It's sad reading shit about people from your favorite band, people you look up to, that could or could not be true.

My auntie is an alcoholic. She can't stop. After battling cancer for the past 2 years, she still would not stop. It's her vice. Her grip on life. She was escorted to my house one morning at 3 am on day by the police. She and my Uncle got in a fight at the hotel they were staying at. I held her, while she cried from 3 am until I left for school, 5 hours later.

I've never told this to anyone, so people, feel special. My mom was an alcoholic. She has been sober for 5 years, and I can't be any more proud of her. I love my mom soo fucking much. I'd watch her drink all night, then argue with my dad, then after getting over the hangovers, they'd act lovey-dovey again. No one knows how many nights I'd lie in bed, crying because I was scared of my mommy's outbursts. I am over that fear now, only because I have faith that she won't ever go back to that life. I look up to my mom for battling and beating her addiction. I love her for it. No one would ever think that she was an alcoholic, she is so tiny and adorable, and she has a very good-paying job. Her and my dad have been happily together for 24 years, and seriously, they are more in love now, than ever before. I can't even say how much I love my parents.

So yes, it is hard to be a bystander and watch someone's addictions spiral out of control. It definitely is hard for them to get the help they need. Which is why, that I hope for Gerard's sake and for all of his friends and families sake, that he gets the help he needs if he does have any addictions right now.

Anonymous said...

Paperheart:

That's wonderful news about your mom. You, as well, for sticking by her and your dad while problems were being dealt with, and at such a young age no less.


"Keep the Faith"

JocelynHolly said...

It was hard for me to watch and deal with. Now, I know that I never want to touch a drop of alcohol. Watching that while growing up, it affected me, but in a way that I can't show it. It affected my outlook on life.

Thank you for the kind words mustard.=]

JocelynHolly said...

Although, I can't say that I've never tried any type of alcohol, because I have, and really, what is so good about it? It tastes awful!

Anonymous said...

I understand. Sometimes it, unfortunately, takes someone else's life experience to guide our own. It's a shame it has to be that way, but, maybe sometimes it's for the better.

There are things other people in my life have gone through, and I've learned from their mistakes. That's what I'm trying to say.

JocelynHolly said...

Oh I understand that mustard. Sometimes all it takes to learn is to watch someone else stumble and fall and make mistakes.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Paperheart. That wasn't directed at you. I was just making generalities. :)


I'll be back later tonight. Everyone, have a great day or make it the best you possibly can!

See you guys around.

Anonymous said...

My Chemical Romance plans Hawaii show in December

Advertiser Staff

New Jersey-bred neo-goth misfits My Chemical Romance are returning to Honolulu for a Dec. 14 show at Blaisdell Arena.
Tickets priced at $37.50 go on sale at 9 a.m. Saturday at www.ticketmaster.com, by phone at 877-750-4400 and at all Ticketmaster outlets, including the Blaisdell box office and all Times Supermarkets.

The concert is set for 7 p.m.

The band is currently wrapping up a world tour in support of its 2006 million-selling disc "Welcome to the Black Parade." The unapologetically over-the-top concept record about a terminally ill, deathbed-trapped young man gazing back on his unremarkable life debuted at No. 2 on Billboard's Top 200 album chart in November and was named Best CD of 2006 by Honolulu Advertiser entertainment writer Derek Paiva.

In his December 2006 review Paiva wrote, " 'Welcome to the Black Parade" is one of the most unabashed rock 'n' roll love letters ever written to rock fans by rock fans. ... Pick a track, any track. Then try to figure out which of its musical heroes My Chemical Romance is channeling — and sometimes outright stealing from.

Instead of falling face first on its classic-rock-geek CD collection, My Chemical Romance triumphs with a fearless sound fully embracing 'where'd-I-hear-that-before?' musical teases while keeping things wholly original."

My Chemical Romance's last Honolulu concert was at Pipeline Cafe on Feb. 15, 2005.

Anonymous said...

Well, today's the day.

Anonymous said...

Let the funeral dirge begin... for today the message will die.

Anonymous said...

oh good grief...that's taking it to the extreme.

Anonymous said...

No one confronts him because when angry he cuts them out of his life.


So fucking what? If my best friend was an alcoholic, you can bet the absolute first thing I'd do would be to piss her off fucking royally.

Self-absorption and MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE aren't going to get this kid anywhere in this world. And I wish I could meet him in person someday, because I'd have the fucking balls to tell him myself, temper or no temper.

He might be an angry ram, but nobody walks away from a raging bull.

-Amyranth is not starting the day off well.

elena said...

Paperheart - I just got caught up on reading so I'm behind but I just want to say I'm proud of your mom. I'm also very proud of you for your whole outlook on the situation.

Anonymous said...

Fool enough to almost be it
Cool enough to not quite see it
Doomed
Pick your pockets full of sorrow
And run away with me tomorrow
June

Well try and ease the pain
But somehow well feel the same
Well, no one knows
Where our secrets go

I send a heart to all my dearies
When your life is so, so dreary
Dream
Im rumored to the straight and narrow
While the harlots of my perils
Scream

And I fail
But when I can, I will
Try to understand
That when I can, I will

Mother weep the years Im missing
All our time cant be given
Back
Shut my mouth and strike the demons
That cursed you and your reasons
Out of hand and out of season
Out of love and out of feeling
So bad

When I can, I will
Words defy the plan
When I can, I will

Fool enough to almost be it
And cool enough to not quite see it
And old enough to always feel this
Always old, Ill always feel this

No more promise no more sorrow
No longer will I follow
Can anybody hear me
I just want to be me
When I can, I will
Try to understand
That when I can, I will

For you mayo!!!

Anonymous said...

Hey everyone :]

- Jade

Anonymous said...

If there is anybody here of course..?

- Jade

Anonymous said...

Well I guess it's just me and you Mayo.

Fancy a chat?

Im extremely bored, yet I feel attatched to this place, like it's not right to leave.

- Jade

elena said...

Hello Jade, How are you today?

Anonymous said...

Hey.

Glad im not alone lol.

I was getting quite bored of talking to myself for a second.

Im not too bad thanks, and yourself?

- Jade

elena said...

I'm okay but dealing with stupid dial up at the moment. Please don't think I'm ignoring you. It just takes so long for the page to load. Any thoughts on tonights concert?

Anonymous said...

Oh that's no problem.

Im not one to know about the bands whereabouts, I never have been. The only dates I occasionally know are UK dates, but I mostly turn a blind eye to them as I know I cant ever go. School life, it really keeps you down sometimes.

But anyways, did you want to express what you were feeling concerning tonight concert? I'd be happy to listen.

- Jade

farawaysoclose said...

hello everyone!
just popped by.
wanted to say to paperheart that what her mum has achieved is brilliant, as i'm sure you know. addiction to anything is such a hard thing to deal with.
hope everyone is well??

Anonymous said...

Hello FASC. :]

Im doing great thanks, and yourself?

- Jade

elena said...

I am one of the people who are upset about MSI opening for MCR. A year ago that band would never have been considered for the spot. The lyrics they spew are so against everything MCR said they stood for. I laughed when someone pointed out the MSI has a disclaimer that its words are to be taken with tongue in cheek. Wow, some things just aren't funny no mater how you say them.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you Elena. It's totally against MCR's normal view on things.

We can all say that things are changing quite rapidly lately. Because of Gerard? I think mostly. But none of the less there still producing music at the same standard, which to me, is just as important.

- Jade

elena said...

Yes, The Black Parade I believe will go down as a classic rock album. It will be timeless. But when it was made was when he started to change. Begining with his break-up with his girlfriend of 6 years. Since that time he has been changing so quickly it's scary.

sdock10 said...

Mayo,

Just felt the need to send you one more message.....

"There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls."

Remember that and hold on to it tightly...

Love to You always,
S

p.s. Nothing like the cold night air and a bright moon to make you feel alive....

Anonymous said...

Yes, his break up with 'Kat' I believe her name was, is also what I believe to have triggered his change. He has changed an awful lot since then, and he's current behaviour is not helping anyone. We all know that the is desperate for love, and I think Gerard thinks that his only way of getting this is to attract even more attention to himself, even if that does mean for the wrong reasons.

To me, he is one of the smartest men alive, but where love is concerned, he doesn't have a clue.

- Jade

sister midnite said...

Hi, whoever is here.

Paperhearts, thank you for sharing that with us. *hugz* You have a lot of strength.

It makes me shake my head & grit my teeth that a 30-year-old man doesn't have half the balls you have.

I'm with Amyranth. Maybe it's something about us Canadian ladies, I don't know. But if I had the opportunity, there is NO WAY IN HELL I would kiss his ass. I'd be more than happy to tell him in no uncertain terms that he is fucking up his life, and that he deserves better than what he's settled for. (Pertaining to life, not 'the wife'. As one of my friends put it, he's free to bone whatever he wants.)

Maybe that's exactly what *would* work -- someone who doesn't know him to tear a strip (or twelve) off his ass. Yes, I feel bad for him, and I want him to be okay. But I don't have the same capacity to put up with shit as your average person. Hell, if the Pope pissed me off, I'd let him have it. ^_~

Seems to be one of those 'damned if you do, damned if you don't' situations. People treading lightly so he doesn't cut them out isn't working, because he just pushes the shit that much further. He seems to be taking advantage of everyone who enables him, which could very well be exactly what he wants. What's really troubling me is how far he might go before the people who love him break, and he ends up exactly where he fears most: alone.

Mayo/Gerard/whoever, listen to me:
If you don't quit fucking around, you are going to lose everything you've worked for. You need to fucking listen to someone, they're saying things you don't want to hear because they care about you. Don't be stupid enough to throw that away.

farawaysoclose said...

just popped back in again.
hi jade, sister midnite, sdock, elena and anyone else.
i think we're all feeling a little down. well i dunno i am anyway.
so they're back on the road again. i wander what it will bring this time?? if some one had told me before proj rev that gerard would be married by the end of it, to some one new i would have said yeh right course he will!!! this last year have been un predictable to say the least!!
i know its not my right to necessarily predict but lets just say the odds on it all would have been high!!

farawaysoclose said...

i meant "wonder" not "wander" of course! i wish we could edit our comments i hate spelling things wrong!

Anonymous said...

Watch and wait for it.

Tonight will surprise all who is there.

Actions will speak louder.

Then make your call on the tour.

sdock10 said...

....Rock the fuck on! Rock on!

JocelynHolly said...

Thank you all for what you've said. It took me a while to click the publish button. Now I know that it was worth it=]

Anonymous at 6:11, what is the 'surprise'? Wait, never mind, then it wouldn't be a surprise=]

Anonymous said...

anon can you give us more info.

JocelynHolly said...

"Actions speak louder than words"

Very true.. so is Gerard going to write "Mayo" on his neck?

JocelynHolly said...

OR is he going to come clean about it all?

Oor have paperheart written on his arm? =]

(jokes)

Anonymous said...

anon at 6:11 you can't say all of that and leave us hanging.

sdock10 said...

hey PH,

he will have paperheartxx on his arm and sdock10 on his neck!

super bad ass!

or...Queen FF2007

JocelynHolly said...

Hell yes!
If he did that, wow, I'd love him to the moon and back down to the dirt on the Earth!

Anonymous said...

what time does the show start?

JocelynHolly said...

I'd think around 7 or 8 their time.

sdock10 said...

Does anyone remember what the link is to the live feed of the show because I can't get it to play?

It's all in like slovakian (is that a word?)....

JocelynHolly said...

Oooh.. Uhmm I can find it for you!^_^
I just saw it somewhere!

Anonymous said...

WE are only a few that come here and read.
No one important, just a seed in the grass waiting to grow.

JocelynHolly said...

WATCH LIVE STREAM WITH MCR TODAY!!!!!
From Slovakian concert:)
go here: www.rockovajesen.sk

and click on: V den koncertu LIVE KAMERA

spread this to every MCR fan:o) byeeeee tomorrow.
Cali



^^found that on buzznet.

Anonymous said...

here it is

http://www.rockovajesen.sk/

Anonymous said...

oops too late!

JocelynHolly said...

*laughs*

I'm sorry to beat you to it anonymous.

sdock10 said...

ph,

That's where I was but I don't see any live feed yet???

JocelynHolly said...

I don't think it's started yet. It might have because I don't know what time it is where ever the concert is.

sdock10 said...

MCR:

BURN THE MOTHERFUCKER DOWN TONIGHT!!! (not literally)

BURN BABY, BURN!!

Anonymous said...

ooh how ironic that the slovakian web page says 'come one come all to this tragic affair'

sdock10 said...

it's like 6:45 over there...i think

JocelynHolly said...

Hmm.. then it should start around 8 there, so 3 pm here?

Anonymous, do you know something that we don't know?

Anonymous said...

no, not at all. I just meant the whole sharing the stage with MSI. It's pretty tragic in my opinion.

With a capital T!

JocelynHolly said...

At least 3 where I am, in Winnipeg.

JocelynHolly said...

Haha it is tragic!

Anonymous said...

so we don't know when it starts? I can't see it on the web page.

JocelynHolly said...

All I see is some video of a lady talking in a foreign language and the teenagers song playing in the background..

Pixie said...

hallo everyone, wow over 1000 comments already...

Pixie said...

does mayo changed his localtime?

JocelynHolly said...

Hey Pixie, sorry to run out just as you came in but I have to head back to class!

Byee everyone!

I'm excited to watch the live concert tonight!

*hugs*

Love
-007

JocelynHolly said...

Yes he has changed it Pixie. But that was a few days ago.

Pixie said...

oh no problem, have fun paperheart *hugs*

huh really? I didn´t recognized that before.. shame on me ^^ i´m getting old ... ;)

Anonymous said...

Good evening ladies and gentlemen! How are you?

MCR concert starts at 22.15...

Anonymous said...

that's late!

Anonymous said...

19:00 - DESMOD

19:45 - METROPOLIS

21:00 - MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE

22:15 - MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE

I thought we could see the other bands as well (well, not all of them ;)), but the concerts have already started and I still see the Teenagers-with-Slovakian-woman video...

Pixie said...

hi villanelle :)

huh jep that´s pretty late...

Anonymous said...

Hey pixie!

Well, for me it's not so late for a concert... in Spain they usually start at 9 or 10pm so...

Anonymous said...

I can't see anything at all :(

I'd better go, I have homework to do. Bye everyone!

Pixie said...

bye anon :)

it´s the same here, gigs start 10pm or later, but shows of international acts are earlier, like mcr etc, they usually starts around 8pm...

Anonymous said...

On rock festivals here, the most important band plays the last (I went once to a Cure gig that finished at 2am :D)

Anonymous said...

The show had already started but I don't see a V den koncertu LIVE KAMERA to click on.

I kind of wanted to see it,I was really curious about the show.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hi everybody been catching up so where on the page is the v den koncertu live kamera.

MissTottenham said...

Hello Mayo!

Hello everyone, how are we?

Who's still here?

Anonymous said...

Hi martha and anon, I'm still looking for it...

Anonymous said...

Good evening, MissT, how are you?

Pixie said...

I also have no idea where to click *hmpf*

Pixie said...

hi mj and hi miss t *hugs* :)

MissTottenham said...

Hi Villanelle, I'm good, how about you?

MissTottenham said...

Hello my pixie chum *hugs to you*.

Anonymous said...

I'm fine, thanks! I'm looking for the fucking "kamera"...

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hi miss t, Pixie, Vill, and anon. Hugz to all

MissTottenham said...

Hiya MJ, hugz to you too.

Pixie said...

I can´t find anything.... but it´s not on the mainpage the windowsmediaplayer? maybe they start the livestream later? I have no idea...

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Alright there has to be someone out there lurking who knows how to get that damn video too work. Tell us now.

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's the main page one... but we won't know until and hour and a half...

Anonymous said...

Only MSI and MCR are being shown, so the live show hasnt started yet, thats what i heard.

Anyways- Everyone vote Gerard Way, Sexiest Female in the Kerrang Awards, so far its 1024 votes. But i dont think you can vote anymore because our countless voting has crashed the system.

farawaysoclose said...

he is the worlds sexiest female! except he has a dick! haha!
hello to you all!!!!

Pixie said...

ok so we´ll wait till msi hit the stage and if the video on the mainpage isn´t working we´ll still have an hour to search ;)

Pixie said...

hi faraway :)

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hello FASC and gel.

Anonymous said...

hi faraway! join us in the quest of the Holy Gr... I mean, the live camera!

Pixie said...

so ok it should start now, right? :)

farawaysoclose said...

yes i went there earlier and it was all very foreign!!!
we'll get it sorted by 22.15!
well i probably won't but some one will.
does anyone know that if we don't get to watch the live feed tonight is there a way of accessing it tomorrow??

sdock10 said...

Hi Everyone,

So do what time does MSI start? In like an hour?

capture this void said...

Anonymous said...

Watch and wait for it.

Tonight will surprise all who is there.

Actions will speak louder.

Then make your call on the tour.

October 30, 2007 6:11 PM


Call me stupid, but I don't know if this is a good thing or bad? It gives me some sort of strange vibe. If this is another anon just fucking with our heads, I swear i'll cap someone.

Anon, elaborate. Don't leave us hanging.

Pixie said...

nope they started 10min ago

sdock10 said...

Rock 'n roll...rock 'n roll.

Pixie said...

hi sdock and ctv :)

sdock10 said...

Hey Pixie and ctv!

anima said...

Hi Everyone! MSI is starting now and MCR about an hour after that. I think they will only stream MCR. There is no way they can stream MSI. The censorship alone in the US would prevent that from happening.

Anonymous said...

Hi sdock and ctv! MSI should have already started...

capture this void said...

Hello, my lovely. How are you?

sdock10 said...

hey v!

MissTottenham said...

I don't know if someone has mentioned this. Someone put this on vv's blog:

The threat to harm oneself is easily heralded.
Walking on eggshells all the time is an exhausting task to accomplish.
Too exhausting to deal with the stress of a farewell tour?
It's not only the fans who turned their backs on their messiah.
Remember, not all apostles were loyal till the end.
Kiss. Kiss.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hello sd10 and CTV. I still have nothing as far as video goes anyone who can help please give us a sign.

farawaysoclose said...

ooh this is exciting!!
i wonder what gerard will have sharpied on him tonight??

sdock10 said...

Hey MJ and MissT!

The threat to harm oneself is easily heralded.
Walking on eggshells all the time is an exhausting task to accomplish.
Too exhausting to deal with the stress of a farewell tour?
It's not only the fans who turned their backs on their messiah.
Remember, not all apostles were loyal till the end.
Kiss. Kiss.


hmmm, that is interesting reading!

farawaysoclose said...

miss T that sounds scary! do you think one of them won't be there tonight. do we even know if bob will be there?? if he was ever injured or what??

MissTottenham said...

Hi sdock10! How are you tonight?

Martha Smith-Jones said...

It sounds as if someone maybe leaving the band.

sdock10 said...

MissT,

I am too fucking fabulous for words...how about yourself?

Anonymous said...

*whispers* Mikey

MissTottenham said...

Hi faraway! How are you?

I guess we don't know what's gonna happen until THIS BLOODY LIVE LINK STARTS WORKING!

What, frustrated, me?

anima said...

I would shit if Mikey wasn't there.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

I do find it interesting that mayo changed his blog time to coincide with the time over there so whatever is happening was planned way in advance.

Anonymous said...

remember..."That's how far in advance I would plan things."

Someone already knows the ending...

Martha Smith-Jones said...

That is who the rumor have been saying anon.

capture this void said...

Now i'm tempted to watch. I still refuse.

Where's my K? I don't want to be alone.

anima said...

MJ, it seems like the blog is an hour behind. It says 8:20, but it's 9:20 there. I think?

Pixie said...

actually the time in bratislava is 9.20pm at the moment... like in germany etc....

the time here at mayo´s is for example uk...

MissTottenham said...

sdock10, I'm good.

Can I bask in your fabulousness?

sdock10 said...

MissT,

Of course you may, I have enough fabulousness for all to share...even you, Mayo.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Well its close enough so that we all know the time over there even if it is off a little. Has anyone yet to get that link to work. Hey anon you want to clue us in on how to work that site.

capture this void said...

Maybe it will work on it's own when the show begins.

Does anyone know how long it will be?

MissTottenham said...

All I know is that where the video clip is now, yesterday there was a box that said Kamera.

Maybe it will just start when MCR take the stage. Maybe nothing we click will work and it will just start automatically.

farawaysoclose said...

hi miss T, i'm fine.
hi everyone.
god i hope we get it to work!

anima said...

I have to leave. Please fill me in when I get back tonight. I have a feeling this is going to be quite the show.

Love to all of you!

Anonymous said...

...waiting for the blood to spill or for words to spill?

elena said...

Why am I so frightened for a fucking concert to begin?

Pixie said...

bye anima hi elena :)

Martha Smith-Jones said...

later anima

sdock10 said...

Come on! It's gonna be just fine! That's what I am going to believe.....until further notice.

sdock10 said...

Oh Hey Elena,

I am so rude sometimes! How are you?

Anonymous said...

Why does everyone have their panties in a twist.
Its just a normal concert that will be shown, nothing bizarre or outrageous will happen, well at least i hope not.

I'm not going to be able to watch it, due to this shitty computer, but when it comes on can someone report wants happening.

1065 votes, Niice, maybe Gerard will actually get first place this year.

farawaysoclose said...

nothings working!!!
i have a fear that you'll all get it to work and i won't!!

Anonymous said...

Hi elena! Bye anima!

I'm even searching the forum, even though I don't understand a word XD

MissTottenham said...

Well peeps, let me take your mind off worrying for a mo by going off on a tangent.

You learn something new every day. I'm watching TV and it is a programme about Tutankhamun. I knew he had a bad back and walked with a cane but I didn't know this.

Chest measurement 31"
Waist measurement 29"
Hips measurement 41"

Bizzare. But again his dad was physically strange too

sdock10 said...

gel said...
Why does everyone have their panties in a twist.
Its just a normal concert that will be shown, nothing bizarre or outrageous will happen, well at least i hope not.


Agree with you 210%!

Pixie said...

i´m sure nothing special will happen...

elena said...

Hi guys. I really am trying not to buy into all the doom and gloomy but I just have this bad feeing.

sister midnite said...

I'll be missing it, too... I have to go to the doctor. :(

Somebody fill me in on this HEINOUS act that may or may not take place?

I love you, everyone! :D

sdock10 said...

Don't worry Elena, it's hard to be gloomy with unicorns around!

:)

sdock10 said...

LOVE YOU TOO, Midnite!

MissTottenham said...

See you later Sis midnite. Good luck at the Doctors.

capture this void said...

Goodbye sister midnite. You will be missed.

sdock10 said...

Gerard, Frankie, Mikey, Ray, & Bob,

I wish you all the fabulousness you can handle tonight!!

Rock on...

Kick some Bratislavian (word ?) ass!

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hi elena

farawaysoclose said...

nice stats miss T!

MissTottenham said...

Yeah faraway, a bloke with child bearing hips ha!

Martha Smith-Jones said...

later sis midnite

Pixie said...

bye sister :)

Martha Smith-Jones said...

I'm want Gerard to wear a shirt that says Queen of FF07. That what I want it to be. But I never hope for the best I always think the worst will happen. that way I'm not disappointed

elena said...

Hi Martha, how are you?

Martha Smith-Jones said...

I'm fine how about you.

sdock10 said...

The only thing I do get the feeling about is this supposed link we're supposed to be able to click on.....

elena said...

Not quite sure how I am today. It' just one of those days

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Well we may have some good news or we may have some bad news today so things could get better or they could go down hill.

Want to take a guess at what the news could be. Either bad or good.

Pixie said...

or no news at all....

capture this void said...

Maybe we'll find out the reason why they canceled the Maine show?

He's say it out to the public so everyone can hear once and for all? That would be smart.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

I want something to happen something good.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Here is a new song we've been working on hope you enjoy it.

capture this void said...

Maybe they'll perform the new song.

farawaysoclose said...

yeh me too martha.
i'm all on edge! i've been in a funny mood today anyway.
if we can't watch it now i'll be disappointed!

MissTottenham said...

I want Gerard to say "due to unforseen circumstances, MSI will not be appearing at our UK shows".

toujours said...

hey everybody, are we ready for the show? *fingers crossed*

i've got the slovakian page up, and it's just the woman talking...you guys aren't getting an image as well, are you?

capture this void said...

Miss T:

Post of the year.

Pixie said...

hi toujours :)

miss t:
"I want Gerard to say "due to unforseen circumstances, MSI will not be appearing at our UK shows"."

not only the uk shows... all shows after this one tonight!!!!!

farawaysoclose said...

with you on that one miss T!

Anonymous said...

I doubt they'll play the new song. Its either a Mama B-side or on the new album, and i dont think they'll tell us about Maine thing live, since i doubt Bratislavians could care less and its not the most appropriate time to do so.

Im still hearing rumors about the Bob broke his arm, and someone said it was confirmed, but im in doubts.
Broken arm and playing tonight? hmm...

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hello Tj just that woman talking over and over again. It is a strange day today FASC and Miss t I hope you are right.

Anonymous said...

Five minutes, darlings...

And still that woman with the Teenagers video, hmpf

toujours said...

hey there pixie! ^.^

Pixie said...

5 minutes... hopefully it´s working...

Anonymous said...

Hi toujours!

(I'm late, as usual)

Martha Smith-Jones said...

I'm sick of hearing her say MSI. I really really am.

capture this void said...

I'm more sick of hearing

ALL TOGETHA NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWGKLER';KLHGDK;SL

*punch*

toujours said...

hi villanelle! (i'm always late too! ^.^)

okay, thanks for the info, miss t!

dei gratia said...

Hello Mayo!

Couldn’t make it last night, just caught up!
Thanks for the new post, beautifully written and desperately sad.
Everything I thought has already been said, so eloquently!
The anon posts and conversations of late make me feel worried and sick.

I have been questioning myself a lot lately, Mayo/Gerard! Why do I care?…….why do I come here and discuss you?

I don’t really know! I have admiration and respect for you and the band and love the music….but I like a lot of bands.
I am older than you (not much!) and have never been a fan-site lurker/poster of any kind before. Yet, I developed a concern and a bad feeling that lead me here. Why? Am I freaky to care about someone I don’t know?

Maybe, I feel I want to help save someone ‘cause I can’t save the person I really want to save?
He has always been the most important person in my world; the one I love the most!
I have tried again and again and yes he tried to cut me out ; the worst pain I have ever felt!. So now we acquiesce; we ignore the behavior, the ‘problem’; we keep the peace, the mood light, make sure he eats and is safe. Not because I want to give up but because the alternative should he cut us out, is frightening!

Maybe I am transferring my desperate frustration and helplessness to someone else, maybe I need to save someone!?!?
I don’t know?

Maybe, it’s purely selfish.
Maybe I now need the amazing people I’ve met here. Maybe I am seeking to understand things I can’t make sense of.

Sometimes he will talk; really talk! They will say “Oh god! He’s spouting that shit again!” . It’s not shit to me. I understand it, I feel it! I don’t tell them; don’t want to worry them. We have spent many a night, just the two of us, discussing our ‘shit’.

I was born in the early hours of the morning and when my mum and I were settled he left to get some sleep. When he returned the shift had changed. As he approached the desk the nurse looked up, then looked at him intently for a moment and said “You must be Mr. W………” he confirmed that he was and enquired how she knew his name. She simply said that she didn’t but that there was only one baby that could be his.
The female version, or so I’ve always been told. Same temperament, same birth marks, same shit!

What he is going through now terrifies me………I need to know how to deal with my shit…….maybe that it why I was drawn to you. And now I find comfort in the amazing people here!

Maybe, I see something of him in you and you in him?? He is/was an amazing man; intelligent, talented (a kick-ass drummer), always remained true to himself (and us!) and what he believed was right. He thinks too much, cares too much, feels too much!

Maybe I am a psycho who regularly roots through your bins!

I do care and am worried, for whatever reason. I wish I could do something to help or just give you a hug!


P.S. Never actually rooted through anyone’s bin; though I did once catch a member of The Smiths rooting through mine. A bizarre honour! One you may appreciate.

Anonymous said...

I'm sick of hearing her, period

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Don't you mean vunch

capture this void said...

Yes, yes.

Thank you for correcting me.

MissTottenham said...

Hi DG, welcome to the show. That's if the bloody thing works.

Pixie said...

hi dg :)

Anonymous said...

I don't see V den koncertu LIVE KAMERA

Pixie said...

we all don´t see it ...

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