It was written from another’s perspective. A recollection of a conversation turned first person. Expensive, anti-climactic words ringing in my ears with an unrelenting need to, once again, find voice. In reverse, they became a bit of guilt unfurled to reveal how my selfish needs superseded best interest. Recall that I held on too long, to that room, to that moment.
“Just say it, say it already”
“I don’t.”
As painful as it may have been to hear it rephrased in that manner, I never meant to be cruel. And now, when the melody of the moment presents itself, I am reminded to never again make that mistake. Although ironically, it was only after repeated cost that it became my lesson. I hope it has become yours, as well.
p.s. volumes like breadcrumbs lead back.
Friday, September 12, 2008
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5,657 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 2601 – 2800 of 5657 Newer› Newest»I agree it was gross and sexual harrassment. It's over though. Drop it. If the OPS are correct and Frank realy does read this then please stop embarrassing him by bringing it up. They can keep making fools of themselves professing their love for him every time they come on. He's not going to leave Jamia for them or for Gerard. Let them have their fantasy. Let them spread their stupid rumours too. It is not going to affect anything in the long run. But can we please drop the "sex list" subject.
Opj could not be anymore obvious unless se had a neon sign saying that Frank and Gerard fucked in Germany and Frank was going to leave Jamia since he cheated on her.....until Gerard told him I don't love you.
If Frank cheated on Jamia with anyone, he would leave her. He wouldn't stay with her just because the other party did not want to be in a serious relationship. If he didn't love her, he wouldn't have married her.
Iawtc.
What have the OPS done to you personally? There is a definite personal feeling to these attacks. You don't care about any of the people you are writing about, you are using them to attack the OPS. Which is far worse IMO. What did they do to you PERSONALLY? Leave out the rest of the people.
Fimble star, back the fuck off.
The only true wisdom consists in knowing that you know nothing.
Anonymous said...
Straight from FIMBLE STAR'S lastest blog post
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Mind games and tiddly-winks
So many people think that to play tiddly-winks, you need to be in the know.
The only thing you need to know is to not let bitter old sweaty bags play your game.
You never know when they will hide and take your pieces and then try and blame the person next to them, and claim that they stole your tiddly-winks.
After all, you only wanted to play with your tiddly-winks, not be stabbed by old bitter hags who want your winkies.
Playing games takes you back to your childhood, Maybe there is a time to stop?
What do you think, cherub/s?
Mispelled by Fimble Star
LOL. You are right anon! This is what she thinks of the OPS. Come out, come out, little Fimmy!
Personally they haven't done a thing to me. But I do think it's so stupid of them to blab on here about knowing Mayo's secret (gee I wonder what it could be)?? then talk about F and G having an affair and then get offended when the rest of us know what they are getting at. That doesn't sound like the actions of someone invited into MENSA, does it?
Oh, please! You couldn't be more transparent. You don't care one bit about all that. These attacks are PERSONAL. If it really was what you say, you would speak your mind and leave, not beat everyone over the head with it.
Being a guy...I have to say...there is WAY to much ass sex on this blog. Matter of fact...ANY...is a little too much. Unless she's really cute with really nice T&A ya'll need to stop this...your scaring the straights!!
I am sad that my opinions get blamed on others. I don't really know what happened between Fimble Star and the OPS, if they really did make a post calling everyone hypocrites and then delete it or if Fimble Star hacked into Blogger and made it look like they did. I am not Kapunua and I don't know what happened when they called her an orange little B along with the others. I am not any of them. You don't have to have a name here to read the OPS words. They know Mayo's secret. They said so. The secret is that he is Gerard. They said that too with the Germany thing.
How about ONE fucking day where we don't have to read any anon crap about the OPS, Kapunua, Fimble, or WHOEVER! Can't you live by the old "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all" rule? A little common decency. You are all making yourself look like idiots. Think about it for one moment. Think about what really matters. Do you even remember the people who aren't here anymore because of shit like this? Do you care?
Anonymous said...
How about ONE fucking day where we don't have to read any anon crap about the OPS, Kapunua, Fimble, or WHOEVER!
Thank you, Lord! Somebody finally said it.
No Elena, I don't care. If people leave, that is their choice. Most of them "leave" only to play martyrs anyway.
I am not Elena. As for the fact that you said you don't care, then you need to GET THE FUCK OFF OF HERE!
Anon, what has made you so apathetic?
attacks
Attacks against you, Anon?
Clearly the OPS have got proof that Mayo is Gerard and SS is Frank. They then accuse Frank of cheating on his gf with his best friend and wonder why he doesn't come around much anymore!
he doesn't come around much any more because he knows mayo is not who he once thought he was
Anon at 1:04, really, were you run off by attacks?
If you think Germany was the first time this happened you need to wake up and smell the coffee!
Maybe SS and Mayo don't come around so much any more because of all the bullshit that goes on here. It's much more hostile and nasty.
It used to be fun.
It used to be something I looked forward to - connection with those like me.
It used to be...
12:58 is right 12:56 that wasn't me. I do not speak under the anon title.
Believe me if I have something to say it will be under my name.
Hello Jennicula
Sorry I didn't greet you. How are you today?
Hi Elena.
How are things in your world today?
Are you hanging in there ok?
There is life after this blog. Just go somewhere else and avoid the bull.
You shouldn't have to tolerate this in order to see friends or whatever you want to call each other.
Ironically, and as with most rumors, there is an element of truth to this.
Jamia did 'get in the way' of their love, but not the way you think.
They shouldn't be run off from a place that means so much to them, especially by hateful, hurtful anons. It's not right.
You shouldn't have to tolerate this in order to see friends or whatever you want to call each other.
Yes there is life after and outside the blog.
How so, 1:22?
Anonymous said...
"I know you feel the same way...don't deny it. I know you do....say it...just say it already..."
"I don't."
It wasn't gerard who said 'I don't.'
1:24 To be honest, I worry more about the regs than the anons. It's just easier to blame anons for everything than face who they really are.
Jennicula I am hanging in there. Thanks for asking. Right now I'm trying to catch up on my computer work.
It's such a nice day I wish I was outside.
1:26
how do you know?
It's beautiful here too.
It would make for a perfect hooky day, I just need a good excuse and I'm outta here.
1:26, are you sure the other meant it when they said "I don't" or was it the expected thing to say?
Well, Elena and Anons, have a nice afternoon.
I must get back to work.
1:30, I think you know exactly how I know; just as I think you know exactly where and when.
Nice talking to you Jennicula. Hope your day is a good one. Take care.
Which brings me to the next question, when DID that question get asked? Before or after the Denver wedding?
1:34
i have know idea what you are talking about. you tell me where and when.
If you knew anything at all, it would be better than to speak like that here.
Duly noted. Enjoy the day.
i don't see how the OP's or any of you could know that they fucked and said all that to each other. none of you where in the room with them. i don't even believe it happened at all.
if Mayo is Gerard, i think this post is a response to Eliza's blog that she wrote about him. i don't think it's about Frank at all.
I didn't think I was all that into soap operas before coming here.
If only Gerard and Frank's lives were this interesting!
I guess we can keep dreaming.
For what it's worth, I'm sorry I yelled at you, but I was just so angry. You know I do care.
i have know idea what you are talking about. you tell me where and when.
My mistake.
GV, please go away.
Imagining for a moment that Mayo is Gerard... What if this blog is actually about he and Bob's girlfriend?
For all we know, they could have had some long distance longing that they knew they could never fulfill because it would hurt the band.
Or hell, it could be about Worm (that's his bodyguard's name, right?) They do spend an awful lot of time together.
There was no anger, 1:42.
I shall respect your request, thank you.
Farewell.
Katherine are you off your meds?
There was on my end, 1:48. I'm sure there will be again. It doesn't change the fact that I care about what happens to you.
1:40, can you share what you know?
That's right, stir everything up as Anonymous and then disappear to watch it play out. Get some help.
1:40 is right. Whoever they are, here is not the place.
1:50, your recollection of events appears to differ greatly from mine. I suspect this is a case of mistaken identity. I apologize for any confusion.
Have a nice day.
I was 9/12/08, second 5:59.
Good day.
"1:40, can you share what you know?"
Being privy to information is earned through loyalty. I know that it's quite nice outside today, if that helps.
:) Yep, that helps.
great.another secret blog.
Third 1:50 said...
I was 9/12/08, second 5:59.
Good day.
September 18, 2008 1:56 PM
oh hai L!
2:09, don't make any bets on that.
Although you do ammuse me.
Amuse me.
NONE OF YOU KNOW ANYTHING SO STOP ACTING LIKE YOU DO.
Yup, it's L!
LOL
OPL has a fascination with people getting fucked up the ass. that's why she is spreading rumors that she can't confirm about Gerard and Frank. those two fucking is her ultimate fantasy.
LOL I do love how you try to pin everything on them. Do you dream about them or just think of them all day long?
Gerard and Frank should sue L for slander.
2:09 before this shit goes any further let me just clear this up.
No.
no one dreams about them. they have nightmares about them.
Mayo,
how do you feel about your identity being revealed by a lovely you put your trust in?
HE didn't. Teej and Elena did.
Right, like the Porchies protect Frank? He obviously said something to them when he met them because they all seem to deny that SS is Frank a little to much. They are so fake and transparent. I don't know what he sees in them.
In this corner, wearing the aquamarine shorts and standing 18 feet tall, The OPS Haters!
In this corner, wearing the slightly blue, but not quite, you know, like the color of the old sweater you found in the closet but never wear because of the collar shorts and standing 18 feet tall, The Porchie Haters!
Ok, good clean fight, take your corners and DING!
LOL, at the NJ leathermouth show Frank told the crowd to get off the internet and go live your lives. haha the OP's got burned by their precious Frankie.
...and the TOPSH take the first swing, moving to the left, faking out a right, some contact...
Folks, no matter how this turns out, there is no winner.
hi there mayo, did you miss me?! hey it's friday again!! have a good one mayo.
OK so i did a mustard and got my days wrong!!
sorry mayo, it's thursday!! you knew that though right??!
i had to pop in and correct that cos that is what i am like!
can't say i've missed this anon shit at all!!
hi to elena, jenn and GV.
hi also to any nice anons!
ta ra!
Hello faraway, get some popcorn and pull up a seat! I'm calling the match.
Both sides seem to be resting right now. Takes alot out of you, all that hate.
Anonymous said...
LOL, at the NJ leathermouth show Frank told the crowd to get off the internet and go live your lives. haha the OP's got burned by their precious Frankie.
September 18, 2008 2:45 PM
That could have been aimed at the day crew.
The Old P's were just knocked down.
*waiting for the ref to count them out*
TPH come back with a quick jab to the left jaw, stunned, but still on their feet...
OPS aren't in the fight, anon. Its The Porchie HATERS and The OPS HATERS. Get it right. No ones down yet...
As I said, no winners, but its just ridiculous, ripe for satire.
Frank loves Jamia not two old sea hags. OP's lose by TKO
The OPs experience delusions of grandeur.
...TOPSH give a strong blow, but below the belt, (didn't even know the OPS were nautical) ref parts the opponents...
the porchies need to stay on the porch and the OP's need to keep their thoughts of dildoing Franks ass to themselves.
...anonther opponent has entered the ring, smacked both contenders, and sits in another corner...
As much fun as this all is, I have to go. There's no good outcome anyway. They can beat themselves to a pulp and it won't change anything. Oh, well, oh well.
the OP's are disqualified for bringing dildos into the ring that have Franks name on them.
Anonymous said...
the porchies need to stay on the porch and the OP's need to keep their thoughts of dildoing Franks ass to themselves.
September 18, 2008 2:57 PM
The OPS have kept that to themselves. You're the one who keeps bring it up.
TO THE ANON THAT HAS A PROBLEM WITH THE OP'S....why do you come here to bitch about them? It would be so nice to come here, for once, and have everything back to normal.
Nobody here cares to here this day after day.So if you have a problem, take it to that person,not here okay? Just because you don't like them , there are many here that do.
and that anon was me...
yeah right, and the rest
Kapunua is half the woman the OPS are. Enjoy your time with your sisters baby you childless failure because no man in his right mind would stick his dick into your ugly self...... A shame to your gender.
4:01
you didn't have to cut a her like that. that shit was fucked up.
I see Mayo's house has been trashed and is covered in shit again. I'll be on the Porch.
anon at 4:01, your jealousy is showing and if it's not, you really need to get help. There are people in this life that i don't get along with, but i would never say such ugly stuff about them.
where not gonna take it.......
Solly, smoke, K and fim;
I hope you all have the most fantastic time when you meet up tomorrow.
I am so jealous.
*begs in sad voice, take me with you*
I have not commented here this week even though I have been here. What I have seen has saddened me. Once again friends being slated by people for the same old crap. Can't you people let it drop. Others are willing (even the people involved) to let bygones be bygones.
It makes me so weary.
*waves to Wendy* No humiliating pic just yet.
Ergo, have a gret holiday sweetie. Don't get eaten by crocs.
Have a nice weekend everyone.
Bye.
Ergo, have a great holiday. It's even better than a gret one.
Bye again.
Can't you people let it drop.
yea fimble star. sheesh.
DROP IT LIKE IT'S HOT!
DROP IT LIKE IT'S HOOOOOT!
HI missT and thanks! :)
hi TS and elena if you're still here
hello anons,
you know the main reason it's unpleasant here is the anonymous abuse, whether you think it's correct or not, it is only posted here to deliberately make it unpleasant.
I don't know why you feel the need to spoil things for everyone just because you've decided to dislike particular people.
What would you like to happen? All of us leave?
I get to meet Jules tomorrow! I get to meet Jules tomorrow! I'm fangirling just a teeny bit!
And I'm kidnapping Fimble and bringing her back to Georiga. I am putting her in my pocket where she will play tiddly winks all the way home.
*waves to James*
*waves to Solly*
*high fives James*
HiYa Ergo!
if you'll be truly honest with yourself, ergo, you'll realise that the anon problem did not get all that bad until after certain members (i believe the main ones were kapu and opj) were so mean to a few newcomers whom they accused of trying to usurp mayo's attention. i seem to recall words like, 'who the hell are you?' and 'we don't need new people right now.'
Hi Everyone!
hi sdock how are you?
did you call smoke this morning and get her to check her feet before work?
How great you're meeting up, I'd love to actually meet people, but unless one of us wants a very long expensive flight it'll have to wait, maybe one day!
i'm not a nasty anon, btw and i have no stake in this. i'm just making an observation as someone who has lurked off and on from the beginning.
Bwah, Ergo! No, I didn't call her. I was actually hoping she would do it again. It was absolutely awesome.
I know it sucks you live upside down and so far away from us. There should be some middle ground where we could all meet.
Hi Anon,
How are you?
Childless cunt. Sdock is too. Both together. You can be pathetic together. Have fun.
We are going to have so much fun, it's going to be the best day evah!
Thanks Anon!
Wow, 5:32. Let's hope you don't have any children to learn that kind of behaviour from you. If so, I pity them.
I would rather be a childless cunt than a brainless ass.
regardless of whether it has anything to do with instances like that, there are a lot of people here who are finding that a place where they used to be able to come and enjoy talking to others who are at similar stages of their lives, have similar problems etc etc and it was really good to find others who feel as you feel, especially when perhaps people have felt they didn't have any real life friends who understood how they felt about things, or to just have a good time, joke about and generally just enjoy the community that developed, it wasn't perfect, but it wasn't like it is now.
And I would just like it to stop, whoever is doing the anonymous comments (and I don't think it is a blue but even if in the wild realms of possibility it was), if they would just stop. If you have issues with a person or persons it's really tragic that their single minded pursuit of this is affecting so many other people.
I know that is probably a naive hope but wanting to destroy something that was, on the whole, good is just so cruel and uncalled for.
oh and nice anon I'm also just observing,not directing at you.
other anon, I'd rather be anyone but you, if you need to make comments like that
if it's created by man, we can solve it by man.
The only brainless people I see here are the porchies.
And I thought I was invisible.
Thanks Anon!
who gives a shit, who gives a fuck
solly maybe you should try sticking your finger down your throat
5:43 things can often easily be solved but man has to be willing
then she could pull out her stomach and show you what your words mean to her,
mindless mush that has been digested into a mush.
Now, where did i put my brain.
In your head? nah i dont think so, seeing as you are brainless just like me.
Ack Ack
*tackles Fimmy*
fimble star you should try sticking your finger down your throat too. layy off the mc d's.
hi Fimble
"ack ack" says the alien in Mars Attacks
how can i lay off mccy D's? i dont think i have to power to fire everyone in mccy D's, even without a brain.
Hey, would you like a pat on the head, maybe if we pat hard ebough, somethign may appear? or is it too late for that?
i'm Darth Nihilius
ALF whoop whoop,
How the heck are you and did you have a fun time?
You people are giving me a fucking migraine.
fiffy fiffy is mississippi
did you know:
the thing people often say is dew is actually guttation.
It occurs in times of ample soil moisture and higher huidity.I can usually be distinguished from dew as other inanimate objects will not be damp (dew forms on all surfaces and dries quickly)
if you see a single drop of water on the tip of a grass leaf it isn't dew but water that has come up through the plant by way of pressure from the roots.
it is some of the purest water you can have, so next time you see it, take a moment to bend down and collect it on your fingertip, bring it up to your lips and taste one of the wonders of nature
solly needs to lay off the mc d's too. thats what made you obese. just exercise like 3 times a week and youll be fine
Yantra and Mantra creates Tantra
struth fim!
I'm good, last day of work before 2 weeks holiday, and there are likely going to be very few students so easy day, and I still get paid!
weekend will be packing etc then we fly out Mon afternoon
Bet you are looking forward to meeting up
*hands headache pills and glass of water to Mayo's blog*
*and ice pack*
solly gets enough by running through your mind just to come up with that comeback.
*waves to solly and smok walking*
*waves to semaj*
ergo, i bet you are excited, i cant wait to see your piccies :)
I am excited, i am setting off tomorrow at 10.30 so i hope to get there at around noon
do you know what a comeback is?
why, yes, yes i do.
Do you?
http://www.atkins.com
check it out. i think i heard jenny craig doesnt work
Atkins gives you bad breath and potentially dangerous irreparable kidney damage
Hello Mayo,SS and Family!
*wipes eyes*
OMG IS THAT......
*wips eyes again*
OMG IT IS, IT IS
*runs and hugs dolphy*
Hello :)
hello bella!
*hugz*
YEAH ALBY,IT'S ME!!!
*jumps into Alby's arms and hugs her back*
OH,AND ERGO!
*runs towards ergo and hugs her as well*
How are you guys?
better for seeing you, it has been ages and ages.
Did you get my email?
How are you and the band, whats new and exciting?
Awww,thank you Alby! :D
Yeah,I did and I emailed you back as soon as I was back home...
Me and the band are okay,thanks.Actually we've been practicing a lot lately but you know how much I love playing,so it's all good!
I'm good thanks bella about to head to work , how are you?
Mayo where you be at?
anon he's on a submarine
I'm okay ergo,thanks. :)
Where are you going to for your holidays?
...or buying a new vacuum.
Tantra sounds nice...
we are going to Darwin, I linked a bit on the last page if you want to see :)
have a good weekend bella
I must go off to work, back later
have a safe trip fim if I don't see you before, and everyone else too
byeeeeeeeee
Alrighty, this has facade has gone on long enough. I can solve all this anon mess...
I CONFESS.
I fucked Gerard and Frank in the ass, in Germany.
I only did it (and told everyone about it via email -With pictures!) because I am in love with Jamia and I wanted her attention.
Forgive me. :(
ANYWAY -hope everyone is good. Or will be soon. -loves! ;p
Bye ergo,have a good day!
Hi Lewis!
I fucked Gerard and Frank in the ass, in Germany.I only did it (and told everyone about it via email -With pictures!) because I am in love with Jamia and I wanted her attention.
o_O
Right,I'm off to bed.
Fimble,Jules,Sdock and Smoke,hope you have a great time tomorrow! :)
Godnight Mayo,SS and Family!
See you all tomorrow.
Love you!
*HUGS & KISSES*
hi bella and lewis,
byw ergo, have a good day at work, last day whoop whoop!!!!
bella, i am glad that you are getting to do what you love. I still wanna hear you :) and myspace or f/b. i think that would be too cool.
Hiya Bella!
I just left you a hello! I can't stay and chat -but I miss you!! Hope you are well??
(And I did. You Know it! It was really difficult, it kept falling off... :( If you want to see the pictures, ask the OP's. They know MY seekrit!)
ah ha ha...
;p Hope to catch ya later Bella!! Loves! <33
damn, just missed ya,
Bye dolphy, love ya and miss ya like this much
*________________________________*
have a sweet sleep and i will talk to you soon.
Ahh! Bye Bella! Bye Fimble! Catch you guys later!!
<333
bye lewis, have a nice night.
...the secret is...
the pants are dead, long live the pants.
The pants are missing.
...that you are deluding yourselves into believing one exists...
The OP's know nothing.
Well, there ya go.
I actually heard the pants have gone missing...
Me too, that's what I heard, but you know what they say about things you hear.
Something about believing none or half or some...
Maybe it's wash day...time to get all that dirt out.
Okay, stop effing around and give me back my pants, you guys. That's so not cool.
;)
Can't stay! I really hope you guys are doing okay. :)
Mayo, SS, I hope you two are doing well!
Juels Santana, Fimble Effing Star, SollyDock and Smoke&Venom20, have a blast tomorrow!
Grrr.
Muuusstttarrrddd!!!!!! COME BACK!
:(
Anon,
That's so freaky. I'm washing my pants right now. How'd you know that?
Mustard,
I've been looking everywheres for you. Lucy Bean and MissT said you had runnoft with PPU.
I haven't seen my full name in so long. It made me have a glad.
^_^
Smoke&Venom20
Smoke&Venom20
Smoke&Venom20
Smoke&Venom20
Smoke&Venom20
PPU is flaking on this tutoring thing. Flaker. ;)
Smoke, I think your "&" is working again. You should add it back to your Blogger name!
I'm so sorry I can't stay! I'll talk to you guys later, I'm sure. :)
Have a great night, okay?
Love Reality!
Sorry. :)
Hee-hee.
Okay, Mustard.
*sigh*
Bye
Awww, have a great night, Mustard! Miss you!
Ummm, nope. Grrr.
Nope.
Sometimes you can't wash it all out. It can leave residue and small particles stay there.
That's true.
xox♥♥♥xox
♥♥hello♥♥
xox♥♥♥xox
@_@
Hello!
Well, I managed to wear matching shoes today.
I gotta say it was a good day.
People are mean.
People suck.
Sometimes family can be the meanest of all.
But all in all, I gotta say it was a good day.
Be back later!
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