Friday, September 12, 2008

Echolocation

It was written from another’s perspective. A recollection of a conversation turned first person. Expensive, anti-climactic words ringing in my ears with an unrelenting need to, once again, find voice. In reverse, they became a bit of guilt unfurled to reveal how my selfish needs superseded best interest. Recall that I held on too long, to that room, to that moment.

“Just say it, say it already”

“I don’t.”

As painful as it may have been to hear it rephrased in that manner, I never meant to be cruel. And now, when the melody of the moment presents itself, I am reminded to never again make that mistake. Although ironically, it was only after repeated cost that it became my lesson. I hope it has become yours, as well.


p.s. volumes like breadcrumbs lead back.

5,657 comments:

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Anonymous said...

Dickweed

*sigh*

Short bus offends you but not the word cunts?

Now that says a lot about you.

Or did you manage to scroll right past that one?

Anonymous said...

"Good?"
Yes, thank you.

Amyranth said...

Carrie said...

If you guys hang around until midnight my time, you can see a really unfortunate pic of me from the 80's.

For those of you that haven't been with us, every Wednesday night at Midnight is "Unfortunate 80's Picture" time.

Anonymous said...

tell dad hi for me amyranth.
i'll be there soon.

11.37
i do know what dig your own grave means. it just doesn't seem like something somebody who is so sensitive to death would say. that is why they were so upset, right? a sensitivity to the issues of death and suicide. they could not possibly have come on just to attack, mock and humiliate and name call the night crew bitches
could they?

toujours said...

j., i love how we always think we've trained our pets, when it's really the other way around. good on you guys for seeing through his ploy. :)

Anonymous said...

Keep the pressure on, "dickweed", keep the open mind TJ.

Cunts, keep staying away.

Carrie said...

Exactly!!! And good memory.

Anonymous said...

Are you european, 11.44?

Carrie said...

K does not anon.

Anonymous said...

Amy how was your day?

Carrie said...

the douche name is cracking me up. It makes me think of that horrible commercial.

Anonymous said...

"Carrie said...

K does not anon."




HAHAHAHAHAA she is probably sticking up for herself right now! Calling the night crew "bitches"!!! And one more thing, who was "CAPTIAN HOOK" last night? She even said that was her! She does so anon.

Anonymous said...

Hi Carrie.

TJ, concerning which books I'm reading, last one I read was breaking dawn, but I'm currently reading some old books of mine, and the first volume of Fruit Basket.

Anonymous said...

FUCK OFF K! We all know you were the one calling us bitches.

Amyranth said...

Not as cleansing as it could have been, Summer's Eve.

(Sorry, I had a glass of wine, and I'm feeling funny now.)

You know, I'll be honest, work was kinda dull and boring. I came here and Miss T had posted about her friend Laura, and I felt like a bag. It's awful, because when it comes to serious illness I feel like saying "I'm so sorry" doesn't really mean anything, you know?

I don't know. It just turned out to be a good day for a glass of wine in the end I suppose.

How about you?

Anonymous said...

If it's not K it's one of the others. Fimble Star who is a little liar.

Original Punk J said...

TJ, my series is a mystery series, guy's sort of a free-lance investigator. The first book is called "Big Red Tequila". Don't know how much mystery you read, but it's pretty good. I'll dig around and see if I can recommend some better ones for you.

Amy, going to check out that recipe right now.

Anonymous said...

maybe a little
maybe not

^_~

Anonymous said...

I am glad Carrie.

Anonymous said...

I came here and Miss T had posted about her friend Laura, and I felt like a bag. It's awful, because when it comes to serious illness I feel like saying "I'm so sorry" doesn't really mean anything, you know?




But at least you said it, instead of waving your arms around and trying to get attention for ourself about someone else who KNOW ONE HERE EVEN KNOWS committing suicide.

Amyranth said...

Hallo BC-easter bunny!

Did you ever read GALS?

Carrie said...

Seriously dudes, I don't think it was her. I mean, maybe I've been talking to Miss T too much and I'm all looking for the good in people and the world and such, but I actually think you are wrong. If she does literary stuff, she gives the author props.

Anonymous said...

11:30 & 44 said...

maybe a little
maybe not

^_~

September 24, 2008 11:50 PM"



Lol....

*winks winks*

Anonymous said...

It's not about what offends me. You need to type less and think more. I was called dickweed by a woman closing in on 40 years old.

I have to, ok? :)
People on a short bus don't ride it because they want to. It's a shitty thing to say.

Idea for tonight: You can kill yourself if you choose to. You can support a friend if you choose to. You can name call like you're on a playground if you choose to. You can have your drinks with or without dickweed. You can do whatever you want... except escape cancer.

Anonymous said...

Seriously dudes, I don't think it was her. I mean, maybe I've been talking to Miss T too much and I'm all looking for the good in people and the world and such, but I actually think you are wrong. If she does literary stuff, she gives the author props."


SHE SAID IT WAS HER! And she ALSO said that it was to talk to Mayo. Hello are you not paying attention? Read back! She SAID she anoned as "Captain hook" last night.

Carrie said...

Amy, I know how you feel, I was talking to her on AIM and was tapdancing madly like a fricking Court Jester trying to make it go away. I just didn't know what to say. It's hard.

toujours said...

keep the open mind TJ.

i do my best, twilight anon. :)

bc! fruits basket, oh man, i love that series. and they aren't done with them yet, i noticed. i haven't caught up with the current volumes, but i love that main character. she's actually quite inspiring.

have you ever read hana-kimi? when i was in the bookstore yesterday i saw that the final volume of that series is out, at last, and it's number 23. *yikes* i think i was on number 8 or 9 when i stopped being able to buy them.

Amyranth said...

Big Red Tequila?

I suddenly had this thought of Big Red Gum mixed with Tequila.

Yuck.

Carrie said...

Okay, my bad.

Anonymous said...

You can kill yourself if you choose to.



Maybe she will. There is hope.

Anonymous said...

Dickweed,

So cunt is acceptable then?

Thanks for answering.

Carrie said...

Al is obsessed with Fruits Basket. Also, the mystery Anime or Manga or whatever, so not up on what's what.

Anonymous said...

Kapunua said...

To the anon who posted the Tiger Lily excerpt of Peter Pan last night: thank you. :) The only thing I posted was Hook's question and yeah, it was to Mayo.


She ALWAYS anons as various characters and other stupid shit like that. She even SAYS she does.

Anonymous said...

Cunt had nothing to do with me.

You're welcome for my answering.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dickweed,

So cunt is acceptable then?

Thanks for answering.








It's good enough for Frank. ^_^

toujours said...

i like mysteries, j. so i'll write that down for when i get done with this series. oh! and i found the first merry gentry book at the library, so i have that waiting on the stack too. :)

listen you guys, i just want to say, no matter what you say, saying something kind to someone in pain and grief is always right. it's the reaching out that gets through, not the words you use. trust me on this.

Amyranth said...

Carrie, I know eh? Even in real life, when someone tells me about someone is sick, or someone is dying, the sympathy is there, but it always... sounds funny.

It's like I can't say just how badly I feel, ever.

-A

Anonymous said...

Thanks for butting in 11:57! ;)

Carrie said...

You would seriously wish that on someone over a blog? I mean, c'mon. I know there's nonstop drama here, hell, I've contributed to it myself. But just please, think about what you're saying, and just please, no. Words on a screen, dude.

Anonymous said...

Jas. Hook said...

...rather than crying out, if instead I focus my mind on the many methods I could employ to render my punisher extinct, then with each new lash a better idea comes to mind. I am gaining knowledge with each blow! It is true, then: I am having sense beaten into me!

September 23, 2008 10:24 PM

Blogger Kapunua said...

And one more thing.

September 23, 2008 10:40 PM

Anonymous Jas. Hook said...

Spirit that haunts this dark lagoon to-night. Dost hear me?

September 23, 2008 10:41 PM


Don't even try to tell me that she doesn't post as an anon or someone else. There is proof right there.

Anonymous said...

There aren't any words for grief. I searched several times and came up blank. Gestures are all that matter anyway.

Carrie said...

Yeah, Amy, we can be awkward twins.

Amyranth said...

Teej, you're right. I think the whole "it's the thought that counts" ruings so hollow nowadays though. There's so many ways to say anything, that sometimes just saying it seems like the silliest thing to do.

Did that make any sense?

Anonymous said...

Pretty elaborate plan, Porchies. Too bad someone ratted you out.

Anonymous said...

K brags about her anon tags on AIM. We know that.

Carrie said...

Dang, I said my bad. But still, all wishing death and shit? Not right.

Anonymous said...

So Amy I need to repot my computer.


Amyranth said...

Not as cleansing as it could have been, Summer's Eve.

(Sorry, I had a glass of wine, and I'm feeling funny now.)

You know, I'll be honest, work was kinda dull and boring. I came here and Miss T had posted about her friend Laura, and I felt like a bag. It's awful, because when it comes to serious illness I feel like saying "I'm so sorry" doesn't really mean anything, you know?

I don't know. It just turned out to be a good day for a glass of wine in the end I suppose.

How about you?


The past month has been bad. To much overwhelming shit in my life.

I hear that Miss t' day was one that you can't put words to. I wish I Could help her.

Anonymous said...

Plan?

toujours said...

but when kapunua posts as anon, she does so as a character. always. so if there's an unattributed quote, it isn't kapunua. plain and simple.

Anonymous said...

new post

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

K brags about her anon tags on AIM. We know that.

September 25, 2008 12:01 AM"

She has been various characters. Kool Aid.... and you KNOW she was doing all that X files quoting because she always goes on forever about the X files.

Anonymous said...

Round one goes to dickweed and Amyranth.

Carrie said...

What kind of wine did you have, Amy? And BC, if you're still around, as far as Twilight goes, I'm having trouble picking a team. Al is bound and determined to get herself a Team Jacob shirt from the Hot Topic, and oh, after midnight! Going to post awkward pic of myself!

toujours said...

it made sense amyranth, but you still just say something from the heart, and that will be welcomed. it might sound funny to your own ears, but it won't to the person you're comforting.

Original Punk J said...

TJ, you found the Merry Gentry book! YAY for you! Let me know what you think of it, and Laurell.

Some of my favorite mystery authors are:

Robert B. Parker
Robert Crais
J.A. Konrath
Greg Rucka (who also wrote a Batman novel)
Gregory Mcdonald
James Lee Burke
Rita Mae Brown (of course!)
James Patterson

There, that should be enough to get you started!

Amy, that recipe sounds really tasty! Thanks.

Anonymous said...

So now for tonight I'm the easter bunny Amy? ^_~

Yep, I read GALS, I have volumes 4 and 5, but that's about it. I know they have a TV series that's on DVD though.

TJ, the volume of fruit baskets is with both vol 1 and 2. I'm only on page 12, I think. They're still going strong. I think they're close to volume 20.

Anonymous said...

yenoh ih
(:

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