Sunday, October 28, 2007

Did you hear the one about the man who remained silent only to be heard?

The whispers are only for myself, and I repeat them often enough to know them all by heart. The truth, I held it under my tongue and prayed...all the while losing my hold on the meaning. Now my words are bent and broken from the release. Questionable promises have crumbled in my fist, and what remains is dry and falls through my fingers. It crashes to the ground in small piles, which I blend back into the earth with my shoe. I grab a handful and press it against my lips; it is rough against my cheek. And I am reminded of where it all began.

p.s. what has changed is mistaken for truth without question.

2,853 comments:

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Original Punk J said...

Am I too late to join the party?

Hey MJ, Toujours, Anonymous. It does seem like most of our anonymous "friends" get pretty hinky when they come on. Usually you can tell, though, who's going to be (fairly) legit and who's going to be crackers.

J.

toujours said...

good night, mustard -- sleep well.

Anonymous said...
Toujours,

My thoughts exactly.


well, if you're the same anon as posted at 4:24, then it's more like i echoed your thoughts! :)

but i we want civil discussion, we have to engage in it first.

toujours said...

hello, j. -- i trust you had a good hallofrankieween? :)

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hello J later MIB. So what is topic. Or maybe you can help me come up with something to post on my blog. I feel embarrassed posting about myself I don't think I am that important.

ergoproxy said...

Hi again, well here was better as we could remain civil even when disagreeing

some anons just try and cause trouble.
I think some plan it and post conflicting stuff together

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hello ep I agree with you on the anon thing.

Original Punk J said...

Umm...well, as good as it COULD be without the man of the hour himself, but...;)

Yeah, it was cool. I had a nap, we had one of our good friends over for dinner, watched "Young Frankenstein", and ate goodies. And now I'm sitting up talking to you guys.

By the way, if I suddenly disappear without warning, the computer has been working for fuck-all tonight and is pissing me off.

How was your Frankyween?

J.

elena said...

Hello all - Hope everyone had an excellent Halloween. See I missed some Anon "problems". Oh well I'm not sad about that. My oldest just got back from a HIM concert. The other two are asleep in bed. All is well. Mayo how are things in your world? Are they good? Is your life how you want it to be? I hope that is the case. Look deep inside remember only you know the answer the rest of us can only guess. I for one am tired of guessing. I still care but I know it's a wasted effort.

ergoproxy said...

We don't have it :( but I watched poltergiest this morning at the moment it's 3pm Nov 1st

toujours said...

"frankyween" *cute!*

sounds like a very pleasant way to spend the day!

mine's been a quiet one -- i might do some divination before going to bed, but otherwise, the highlight of the day was wearing a costume to work: nothing like freaking the mundanes by wearing a medieval gown on the bus and in town! ;D

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Well I'm off to bed you guys have a good night and may Frank be with you.

Later

sister midnite said...

Sis Midnite has had the world's shittiest day (check my blog if you want to see where my head was at today), and now it's MY turn to go fucking insane on this blog.

Kapunua, Mustard, and RW have already said a lot of what's in my mind, but I'd like to add to it.

Mustard: FUCK these idiots. Don't let the Anons who are only here to bitch get to you. It's Mayo's blog, but we've made it our blog, too. So let's outline how it works here for all the whiny Anon's-R-US:

If you're here just to bitch about all of us "haters", and what we're doing to this fucking JOKE you call the fanbase, you have tow choices available to you -- SUCK IT UP or GET THE FUCK OUT. We're here because the other sites treat anyone who doesn't kiss The Almighty Gerard Way's royal ASS like they should be crucified. We don't tolerate that bullshit here; even when we disagree, it's all about RESPECT. And it HAS been about respect for each other since this blog began. N00B's are welcome (Anon's included), IF they're willing to discuss things intelligently. If you're a BN/INO/MCRmy member, know that your pathetic attempts to 'attack' only make you look like a friggin' moron, so save them for the kids you can intimidate.

Okay, now that I've gotten *that* out of the way, let's move on to Gerard & the Mrs., shall we?

So if my eyesight is to be believed, I read somewhere up in the comments that he kissed her onstage right before they played 'Cancer'? You guys have GOT to be fucking kidding me. The whole Projekt Rev tour was a bad enough venue for his tacky behavior, and now we have to hear about THIS?

Hey, I have an idea! Like, tell you what, G -- I'll collect $75 per showing from YOU, and then let some trashy guy bone me on your kitchen table. Do you like that, motherfucker? FUCK YEAH, you do!! Hey, why not -- it amounts to pretty much the same thing, doesn't it?! We don't give you our money for you to show us how much you loooooooovve your new wife, we give you our money to see your cute little ass SING. You know, that thing you do with your band? In case you've forgotten, I'm referring to those other four guys on the stage with you. Who, by the way, must love you immensely, because they've stuck around for the entire "Gee & Linds Gong Show You got to where you are because of your voice, and the talent of ALL FIVE of you. THAT's why we buy all your shit, and that's what we go to your shows to see. We don't really give a rat's ass who you're bonking at the moment. So do "the fans" a favor, and get your ass back to the music. Capische?

Another Anon said:
and it's so obvious she will be Mikey's replacement!

I'm still gagging at that, tbph. If that were to happen, My Chemical Romance would become My Chemical Divorce overnight. As in, I would have all my MCR shit for sale on eBay faster than you can say "The End." I dislike MSI rabidly, so I don't even know how well she plays bass. Not that it would matter, really, because the intelligence factor in the band would drop to sub-zero by the end of the first week. She's definitely not the sharpest crayon in the box.

Oh yes, that's right -- she's *hardcore*. Now that's some funny shit, right there. ^_^ (I should make some of my friends go to a show with me. They'd chew her up for breakfast & spit the pieces back out like yesterday morning's toothpaste.)

G'nite, all.

Anonymous said...

Pretty Purple Unicorn has a tattooed arm sleeve.

Anonymous said...

Pretty Purple Unicorn is going to have a big boot mark on her ass if she picks on Sdock again.

toujours said...

okey-doke, that's it for me tonight. i'm going to head out of here so i can get some things done before bedtime.

good night everyone,
and a good day to you, blogmaster mayo. ;)

elena said...

Anonymous said...
Pretty Purple Unicorn has a tattooed arm sleeve.

Really? Perhaps if what you are implying is true then PPU should go concentrate on her Unicorn Boy. Oh look he's jumping on the sofa again.

Anonymous said...

Fake love..
Fake love's when they never be around
But once you get rich, they all get down
Fake love..

Fake love's when your friend your bitch
Don't think with his head only think with his dick
Fake love..

So my friends enemies and my enemies be friends
Dont show no love, don't pretend

Now all these Yes men wanna kiss my ass
But back in the street you aint help me re-up

Some people want nutin' outta life
And some people want it all, let's ball

Listen money talks, and bullshit run marathons
When your money's gone, thats when them hoes gon'

You got a brand new whip, your shit is lovely
Yeah it's aight, but its rims is ugly
Fake love..

gnothi seauton said...

I repeat my statement from 1.20 this morning.

REMEMBER THE NAME OF THE GAME IS DIVIDE AND CONQUER!!

I agree with those who stated that we shouldn't encourage a mob mentality, however the tone in here has been decidedly, how shall I put it, TENSE, lately and we need to just watch that we don't head in THAT direction.

It was Frank's birthday yesterday and we didn't even party!

That said I shall go and get ready for work.

To all those who celebrate it as such...

Happy New Year!!!

And good morning Mayo.

gnothi seauton said...

Oh and Kapunua @ 3.43am,

Maybe he pulls a FASC.

You know, where you wear the other half out then go on the computer when they flake out?!

Sounds plausible to me!

Anonymous said...

gnothi seauton,

The computer is his other mistress!!!

Gets more stimulation out of it too!!

Ha!! So much for Halloween Mayo, not a fright in sight....oh sorry, you did, just realized, that kiss was scary enough!... blah!!

... said...

Fark, I leave for a day or so and then I read about how he kissed his wife before Cancer?

Uh, yeah I know this was probably the topic of conversation a couple of hours or so, but I wanna have my say on it.

First off, that is unprofessional. Its fine for him to go off stage or whatever in the intermission or after the show and give his wife a big kiss, but to do that during a show just pisses me off beyond belief.

I personally don't care what he gets up to in his personal life, but for his personal life to start interfering with his professional life by singing to her and waving to her whilst on stage when he's supposed to be performing for a crowd who paid to see MCR. They didn't pay to see him kiss his wife, they paid to see some music being played.

It is really getting on my nerves that he has started bringing his personal life into the public limelight. I liked it when he was inconspicuous about that sort of stuff, because now the people on INO and Buzznet are constantly talking about it, and really in the eyes of some fans, I have noticed that they are starting to feel disenchanted (no pun intended) by it all, thinking that MCR will break up, thinking that he no longer cares about the music, but the fame and fortune. People are starting to turn off MCR.

He needs to save whatever emotions he feels for his wife until after the show.

farawaysoclose said...

morning all!
can't stop though. wonder what went on last night with you guys?? no time to catch up. anyway hope everyone is ok!

Anonymous said...

There is a dead man in the kitchen, painting with words.

Next to him a dancing bear just looking for a star.

This is a another riddle, sweeties.

A kiss to the first one who knows what I am referring to.

Anonymous said...

Mayo

If that was your post @ 10:35 a.m., Just cut it out with all the Joseph Mayo Wristen poems.

Just A Dancing Bear Looking for A Star by Joseph Mayo Wristen

Have you developed a sudden fetish for him, or do you read his romantic prose to your wife?

And by the way, we are not sweeties and no kisses, (you could have std's)

Anonymous said...

Rofl @ anon 11:08.

I love your wit!

JocelynHolly said...

Ahh, three anonymous comments in a row?!

sdock10 said...

Mayo,

How are things in your world today? My headache is finally gone and now I feel nothing. Nothing...not happy, not sad, not excited, not depressed...just empty.

On to the poem, that was some very interesting reading. "...they will continue to give us everything we need until there is nothing left to give." Relate much? I do, I do. I am the world's best enabler. I allow people to feed off me like leeches, but it's certainly not their fault. I think I quite like the feeling of being light headed by the lack of blood....euphoria.

"The ashes of light being better than the fires of darkness." Well, that sounds like holding out for hope and the best when you basically have shit to hold on to. I'm living that right at this very moment, and even if I am blinded from trying to strain my eyes I will continue to seek the light. Pathetic? Probably.

"Burn it to the ground." See, I haven't got to that point yet. Not ready to destroy my little world that I have helped create. You see...I am powerful in my little castle and in my dreams and I like it. But you can rest assured, that when I've finally had enough, I will sit back and watch them destroy it all....with a smile on my face.

..."your survival will depend on your willingness to fight"...well, pack a lunch motherfucker, because I will stand toe to toe with the best. Even if it is nothing but my hopeless flicker of light, or a worthless lost cause, or a heart that is incapable of loving me.

Do you want me on your side on the theirs?

Love to You always,
S

p.s. Bruised, scarred, broken, twisted, and mangled....but still standing.

JocelynHolly said...

Mayo;
How are you?
I am reading some of these Joseph Mayo Wristen poems right now. You seem to like them don't you? One of his 4 books is "Just A Dancing Bear Looking for A Star", is it not?

A lot of his poems seem to talk about a "hero". A few about a man and his wife, one about the man hiding from his wife's love. Mostly, they all seem to have a very different sense than the one before. Is this why you like Joseph Mayo Wristen?

They must have some sort of meaning to you. That, I am trying to figure out.

Anonymous said...

I thank you SisterMidnite. Eloquently said.

Anonymous said...

I could be talking to a male, female or haemophrodite.

Whoever you are, and if you are the supposed G Way, if you want to smash this band, go right ahead. Take that parody making to the limit. I will personally mail a carton of sharpies to you, together with a book of quotes, just in case you have exhausted your supply.

Let all the teenies kiss your big ass, and throw their money at you. After all, you have no message, never really had...or did you? Hmmm...well, your just a musical prostitute now.

And baby, if you think we won't survive this, think again. Why should people here continue to support you? There's only so many heart strings you can pull.

I just discovered who you really are... a guy trapped in a fat suit, who wants to be the coolest dude with the hottest chick on the block. But somehow, your not quite there.

Anonymous said...

And I reminded of when it all started to go wrong...

Wow another Halloween gone.

This is the last time i'm coming here. I've finally given up on this band. Maybe because its the 1 year anniversary of their last Halloween show.

I remember reading the reviews of that one. People said it was the worst MCR show they had been to. All Gerard did was wave and blow kisses to his girlfriend. People said they felt like they weren't wanted there, that they were only in the way of Gerard and his girl.

And here we are a year on. And very little has changed. The girlfriend may be different, but the sour taste left in my mouth is the same.

I have given Gerard and this band one year, hoping that things would get better. Many bands make mistakes, many bands make bad albums. But some can come back. To me it is looking increasingly unlikely that the MCR i used to love ever will.

And so I am sorry to say I no longer give a shit about this band.
All I can say is that i'm happy to have met all of you, it was good to know that MCR fans do not just consist of the types found on Buzznet.

love to you all, even you Mayo.

H.

Anonymous said...

I still haven't found it within myself to lose faith in this band and their potential. But, I think they've reached the peak of their success. The fans they have gained are trying to stick around. The ones they haven't will remain behind to find other bands that fill their own voids.

I still think there's time to undo the damage that has been done. That's all I'm banking on these days. I still think there's time for them to regain the respect they once had. But that time is slowly running out. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

Sometimes my thoughts get jumbled and I confuse myself on what I really believe. It always helps to make lists. But even doing so, it sometimes makes it harder.

I'm not sure what my reasoning for being here anymore is. I don't think I'm here for the band. I'm here for you all. It's just an added benefit to be able to discuss our 'falling from the number one spot" favorite band. It is the reason we found this place after all.

I'm done with all of the wondering. I'm done with all of the guesses and the indsider information. I'm done with all of the cryptic nonsense. I cannot save Gerard Way. You cannot save Gerard Way. No one can save him but himself. If he wants drink, he's going to drink. If he's going to do cocaine, marijuana, herione, LSD, you name it, he's going to do it. There's no one that's going to be able to stop him. I'm tired of draining all of my advice to Mayo in hopes that it reaches Gerard Way when I'm not seeing any sort of reciprocation. It's becoming futile.

I will still be here if and when he's ready to make the most of his life. I will be here to support that and I will be here in support of the other guys that have to deal with.

My parting words to you Mr. Way:

Continue to make the music you set out to in the first place. Don't pass your lyrics off as truths when you know in your heart that they are only what you wished you felt. It's becoming apparent that's all it might have been in the first place.

I'm happy that you've found someone you love. That's all anyone ever deserves. But please refrain from bringing that to the stage. You can see the frustration it has caused. Was that your intent? Was it your intent to have your fans upset with you for advertising the love you had for her? If it was, bravo. You succeeded. In your line of business, the stage is not a billboard. It's a platform. A platform to display your music, that stuff you worked so hard on. All of you. To take that hard work and dilute it with your personal love life isn't acceptible to me. I want to see what you've accomplished with your music in the past year. That's what I want to see. That's why you're up there. Please take that into consideration.

You're music still moves me. It's just not the same. I question the truth behind it. Should I? Give me a good reason not to after the events that have take place. It used to be all about the music and the message. Why has it become neither one?

You're still the #1 diva. Good or bad? Couldn't tell you.

Anonymous said...

According to this review Frank was wearing an interesting t-shirt.

BRATISLAVA 30-10-07!!! : 10/31/07 2:30PM

OK so I figured I'd write something for you guys about the awesomeness that was this show! xD
(edit)

MSI came on about 9pm and they blew me aw*y. I'd never seen them before, and they had so much energy it was unbelievable. Jimmy was hilarious, Lyn Z was all over the place, Kitty was hyper and Steve was getting cigarettes put out in his mouth etc lol

MCR finally came on about 11pm and I seriously thought my eardrums were gonna burst cause the crowd were screaming so loud. They started off with This is how I disappear which was weird cause they nearly alw*ys start with DEAD!
Then the played DEAD! and by that time the crowd was just crazy! They played a mix of Revenge and tbp (no bullets or b-sides =[... ) and it was just amazing. Frank was wearing a tee saying "I love Gerard" lmao
Gee got us to sing Happy Birthday to Frank :D

No Bob unfortunatley, I think a tech filled in for him but he was really good though. He looked a lot like Zane Lowe who presents Gonzo on MTV2 O_o

Gee was his usual crazy self sayin stuff like "I'm gonna be totally honest with you guys...I dont know shit about your country, I didnt even know where it was and I just got here this afternoon!" lol atleast he's honest..

Anonymous said...

I have been there, I know. The Fat Kid. Always excluded, always last. You look in the mirror and you know you are better than this. You deserve more.Eventually, you start listening to all that well meant advice. Sometimes it even works, for awhile. Maybe you get really lucky and you find something that works longer. Chemicals,surgery, or in my case starvation. They applaud you then, don't they? You're killing yourself slowly, but hey who cares? You look good. Except you don't see it do you? That Fat Kid is still in the mirror. Still, the world is opening up and now you can be first and you can be cool. Except you don't know how. You never learned like everyone else. You missed the social development stage locked in your room. Hiding. You try to fake it. Grab everything you can as fast as you can before they all figure out you are a fraud. Before trying to be normal kills you. Before the Fat Kid catches up with you again.
Oh yes, I know you.

Anonymous said...

I have been there, I know. The Fat Kid. Always excluded, always last. You look in the mirror and you know you are better than this. You deserve more.Eventually, you start listening to all that well meant advice. Sometimes it even works, for awhile. Maybe you get really lucky and you find something that works longer. Chemicals,surgery, or in my case starvation. They applaud you then, don't they? You're killing yourself slowly, but hey who cares? You look good. Except you don't see it do you? That Fat Kid is still in the mirror. Still, the world is opening up and now you can be first and you can be cool. Except you don't know how. You never learned like everyone else. You missed the social development stage locked in your room. Hiding. You try to fake it. Grab everything you can as fast as you can before they all figure out you are a fraud. Before trying to be normal kills you. Before the Fat Kid catches up with you again.
Oh yes, I know you.

Anonymous said...

I didnt even know where it was and I just got here this afternoon!" lol atleast he's honest...


Yeah. At least.


"I love you, Gerard."

At least he's honest.


***Let me apologize for my bitterness today. I've got a case of disenchantment I can't shake. Maybe I should go back to sleep and then wake up again, start the day anew. Ya know?

Anonymous said...

1anon 2many:

You have spoken truth. I think "The Fat Kid" takes a lot of forms, not necessarily about weight. I've been the "Fat Kid." Still am. It's psychlogical and I think I need a brain transplant.

I want that little boy in him to die. I want him dead and buried so this man can shine. But, that dull little one still manages to shove his way to the front.

Anonymous said...

^ ahh MIB, isn't that just the point? the man is the boy. and the boy is still looking for someone to accept him for who he is, not what he looks like.

sdock10 said...

The boy doesn't even really know himself. Doesn't know who he is, what he wants, what he's supposed to do, what he wants to do, who he's supposed to love, who's supposed to love him, where does he need to be, how did he get here....That little boy has no clue. He just wanders around and plays in a world of make believe. The world he created and the only one he really knows.

Maybe that little boy could get together with this little girl and we could make up wonderful stories together and shut the real world out forever...

sister midnite said...

Hi, to all who are here.

Sdock10, all I can say is, thank you. So very much. *hugz*

I'll be riding the numb train with you today. I'm no longer depressed, or suicidally down. I'm just empty.

How about you, Mayo? Are you willing to give us a chance to see the real you for a change? How can anyone accept you for who you really are if no one knows who in the hell that is?

Your games are getting much too predictable, baby. If you like the applause & adulation, you might want to rethink your game plan a little -- while there are still people around who care. You used to pride yourself on being "anti-rock & roll", and now - let's face it - the cheesy 80's bands have nothing on you.

"Are you sitting comfortably?
Then we'll begin."


A leftover football to the first person who can name that tune.

p.s. butchered for the sheer thrill of it.

Anonymous said...

sdock10-
"Maybe that little boy could get together with this little girl and we could make up wonderful stories together and shut the real world out forever..."

I tried something similar to that once. It didn't go so well...

Nice way to state the situation.

anima said...

Sdock, can I join the two of you?

I have grown tired of the real world. I want to rid myself of all the evils and the knowledge that it exists. It chips away at my soul and I do not know how much more I can stand.

It breaks my heart to think this boy is still wandering, but I am somehow comforted in knowing he is not alone. I too am wandering, wondering, and still trying to find my place here. It seems he is surrounded by a lot of us.

anima said...

"I'll be riding the numb train with you today. I'm no longer depressed, or suicidally down. I'm just empty."

Sis Midnite, why am I feeling the exact same way today?

Anonymous said...

does anyone know what happened to bc's blog.

anima said...

It's still there.

sdock10 said...

Anima,

There are plenty of seats still available. I save the seat next to me just for Mayo. Come along for the ride...I switch rails from time to time. Sometimes the numb train, sometimes the bitch train, somtimes the fucking crazy train...but it's one hell of a ride.

Anyone else care to join?

*hugz* to you too Midnite

Everyone else will have to take a number...

Anonymous said...

I don't think Frank had a shirt that said "I love Gerard".He's wearing a black shirt with no lettering on it.

http://buzznet-12.vo.llnwd.net/assets/users16/privrelka/default/msg-119383424101.jpg

He also said this about Bob that I thought was a peculiar choice of words.
"Oh he's ok, he's just taken some time out cause he hurt his wrist."

farawaysoclose said...

hello guys!
i can't stay long.
interesting thoughts from you all.
hey sdock, sister midnite and anima hope you are ok on the numb train?
glad the headaches gone sdock.
mcr are on the EMAs tonight. its on late though but i'll tape it if i don't watch it.
should be interesting???
i'm ok, not numb, not pissed off, a little fed up and worn out but hey such is life!

Anonymous said...

Kapunua said...

Incidentally, i suspect that SS did pop in here once or twice already anonymously. I don't think s/he was one of the influxes of "inside sources" that came today, but before that.


Astute as always. I tip my hat to you, Kapunua.

Anonymous said...

To Kapuna, I was not "taking a shot at Adam Lazarra" I was just saying he get's drunk too, most of them do and thats why no one is probably going to help Gerard. By saying he doesn't you're doign the exact same hero worship you are claiming ohers are doing to Gerard.

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 4:27

Please, speak to the masses. Care to enlighten us?

anima said...

Thank you Sdock. I will join. If you do not mind, I might have to sit on Mayo's lap every once in a while just to get a better look. I'm short, so I tend to miss the scenery above the mass of people. Especially when riding on the crazy train.
.
.
.
.

Nah, who am I kidding? I just want to sit on his lap. ;)

farawaysoclose said...

ha ha anima!
hey i'd join the numb train if i could sit on mayo's lap!
i didn't know that was an option.
hi SS! (it highly likely isn't but i don't want to miss out on saying "hi" incase it is!!

sister midnite said...

Anon @ 4:33, I think everyone knows Adam drinks. But there is a huge difference between being drunk, even a LOT, and being an alcoholic. Gerard admitted that he was an alcoholic. Even if he hasn't touched a drop since, he will ALWAYS be an alcoholic. Whereas someone who drinks has the capacity to out-drink Motley Crue six nights out of seven, but isn't necessarily addicted. I don't think it was your point, but your wording that people took exception to.

Anima: Maybe numbness is in the air right now? Or maybe our hearts need a time-out from all the shit life can throw.

Sdock10: The train jumping tracks is fine. But if it looks like it's going to derail, we'd better grab all the footballs we can get our hands on. It could be one motherfucker of a ride.

Nice to see you, SS!
Love to you!

sdock10 said...

Hi guys, Hi SS, Hi Mayo,

You guys will have to ask Mayo about the sitting on the lap thing. He has a tendancy to jump on and off the train at any given time so it might be a chaotic ride.

Anonymous said...

Give me a reason to believe.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Back, dind't disappear, sorry for the delay. Real life. The anonymous from last night. I want to shed some light, please don't take it the wrong way or to upset you, it's not meant to.

Some of you are asking why Gerard's friends aren't helping him if he's so bad off with the alcohol and drugs. Part of the reason could be because they know in their hearts they can't judge him because most of them are alcoholics too. Yes, Frank is an alcoholic. Ray is an alcoholic. Like someone said earlier, Functioning Alcoholics. You don't have to fall down and stumble and act like an ass to be an alcoholic. They all drink ALOT and regularly. You guys all seem like Taking Back Sunday fans, but guess what, your beloved Adam Lazzara is an alcoholic. Watch him on stage some time.

They are all "Tour Alcoholics" mostly because it's just one of the few things to do on tour. It's not exciting like most people think. It's so boring. You don't get to see that many new places. You spend most of your time traveling and working. It's not easy. Beer and liquor is available to everyone and boredom abounds. You just go and get wasted. Everyone else is.




This is bullshit.

sdock10 said...

You know the reason...You have always known the reason. The reason has not changed. It has just been misplaced. Look for it...it's still there where you left it.

Inside your twisted, broken, heart.

sdock10 said...

I am not going to sit up on my pedastal and give my opinion on what the definition of an addict or an alcoholic is. Have I tried all of the shit you are discussing? Yes. Do I do it on a regular basis? No. Have I sat around and watched people do it? Yes. Have I participated while others sat around? Yes. Do I sometimes want it? Absolutely. Do I sometimes refuse it and loathe it? Absolutely.

But, I know that by just having tried the shit I walk a very fine powdered line. A line that can be blown away at any minute. And then, I will be that person. The drunk, the coke whore, the crank head...it's all a possibilty. Possible because I (not anyone else) made the choice to taste it. And now that I've tasted it, I know the feeling it creates. Knowing the feeling means sometimes wanting to escape and get that feeling back if only for a weekend. And so the downward spiral begins.......

anima said...

Anon at 4:48, reason to believe in what?

Hi Farawayclose! Glad you like that. Maybe SS would want to join too. I think his lap would be just as cozy. And maybe a little more stable.

And Sdock, I will just have to wrap my little legs and arms around him tight so he cannot jump off the train. He will be forced to ride it out until I say he is done.

sdock10 said...

ss,

Did you leave us already?

sister midnite said...

Sdock10, I agree with you SO MUCH.
I'm no innocent, either. In fact, I HAVE been known to out-drink Motley Crue and still function. But it's been a looooooong time. All my post meant was that there's a stigma attached to the words "alcoholic" and "addict" that don't always paint an accurate picture.

Another example:
Most women will (sometimes) take the word 'bitch' in stride. Some may even consider it a compliment. But call a woman a 'c*nt', and she'll rightfully knock your block off. I guess what I'm trying to say is that words have a huge effect.

I need more coffee, can you tell? #^_^#

anima said...

Sdock, sometimes I feel like we are the same person; you are just a million times more brilliant in your ability to express yourself in writing.

Been there, done that, and feel all the same way about everything you just wrote.

Anonymous said...

SS's new latin is"Castus ac sobrius"
Which means 'clean and sober'.

anima said...

SS, that makes me happy.

sdock10 said...

Exactly, Sister Midnite.

I have people who would say that I was a drunk and am destined to burn in hell for eternity.

and...

I have people who would say I am sober and that I'm doing nothing wrong by participating in extracurricular activities.

It's all in the interpretation and the situation...

...I also know people who claim they can "take it or leave it"...which when defined usually means "they take it because they don't want to leave any or be left out"...

*offers the floor to anyone else who is still here*

SS,
Much Love and Faith to YOU,
S

Smoke said...

Anonymous said...
Back, dind't disappear, sorry for the delay. Real life. The anonymous from last night. I want to shed some light, please don't take it the wrong way or to upset you, it's not meant to.

Some of you are asking why Gerard's friends aren't helping him if he's so bad off with the alcohol and drugs. Part of the reason could be because they know in their hearts they can't judge him because most of them are alcoholics too. Yes, Frank is an alcoholic.


OK, anon. You've gone too fucking far this time because when you mess with our KING, you mess with all of us and buddy we will kick your fucking ass while looking fabulous and wearing our best pair of boots.

Love to you SS!

Pissed of Princess,
S&V20

Anonymous said...

oh it was SS!
i'm glad i said hello!
i can't stop (as usual)!
on the drinking of alcohol subject. i'm not ready to admit too much. lets just say i like a drink. i'd like to use the excuse that its in my genes but i know it is an excuse.

capture this void said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Smoke said...

Damnit, I was so pissed off that I couldn't even type pissed off.

Let's try this exit again..


Pissed off Princess,
S&V20

JocelynHolly said...

Hey guys;
I'm just popping in then I am off to another school football game.

SS, thank you for showing up. You always make the mood much lighter and comfortable. I don't know you, but I still love you for everything you've done and said on here to help make everyone's day better etc. No matter who you are, I care for you, okay? I like your new latin phrase now, "clean and sober" ^_^ *hug*

Guys; I'm sad to see The Pale Student go, it's such a shame that she is done with this band. All the best for you PS! It was nice getting to know you a little bit! *hug*

Love;
-007

JocelynHolly said...

P.S. SS, "Keep the Faith" =]

P.P.S. Hello Everyone else! *hugs*

EVERYONE HAVE AN AMAZING DAY!!!

Entropy said...

SS,you know it's really great to hear that.And how you called bullshit on that anon.

Anonymous said...

Did i miss something?
You guys seem very bitter today

Fimble Star said...

hey gel how you doing. ss showed up thats what i think has happened lol

Anonymous said...

Oh i see, interesting.

Well Bob isnt at the EMA's =(

sdock10 said...

gel,

We're not bitter, we are all riding the numb train to nowheresville....

Fimble Star said...

gel how do you know that?

gnothi seauton said...

Good evening Mayo, good evening anybody else who is present.

It seems that melancholia pervades Mayo's house today, I too am feeling out of sorts.

This whole situation is emotionally draining and I feel as if I have engaged in battle for the last month or so. Goodness knows how those of you who receive direct assault within these walls cope. I am exhausted.

So sorry to see The Pale Student leave but I understand the need to withdraw.

We seem to be experiencing casualties at every turn.

What will you do then Mayo, when the last man is down?

Perhaps you will crow with the achievement.

I'm not down yet my lamb, just resting. So very, very tired.

SS, it warms my heart to know you are still here.

Fimble Star said...

hey gs nice to hear from you again. how are things?

gnothi seauton said...

Not too bad FS, thankyou, just in a humdrum mood :{

And you?

sister midnite said...

Sdock10 said:
We're not bitter, we are all riding the numb train to nowheresville....

And getting nowhere fast...

Anybody else need a nap? ::yawn::

gnothi seauton said...

Hello Sister Midnite,

You in a sluggish mood as well?

sdock10 said...

Humdrum seems to be the theme for the day...Wouldn't you all agree?

sdock10 said...

Hey Midnite!

Do they show movies on the numb train to nowheresville?

Anonymous said...

Why do you guys seem so down today?

gnothi seauton said...

And it's supposed to be a day of celebration as well! Maybe I'll get my spark back a bit later.

sdock10 said...

Not down, BC. Just floating along...not feeling much of anything. That's all.

Fimble Star said...

i am good thank gs. having a great time chatting in bc house so if i dont reply sorry i am there but will keep coming back lol

gnothi seauton said...

I think somewhere in central government they changed today from Thursday to Who Gives A Shit Day.
Excuse my language.

sdock10 said...

gnothi seauton said...
I think somewhere in central government they changed today from Thursday to Who Gives A Shit Day.
Excuse my language.


Best thing I've heard all day!

Anonymous said...

Someone who is watching it right now mentioned it. They are going through that whole red carpet shit.

Im pretty bitter too, 3 tests, 2 projects and i have no idea what to do.

Anonymous said...

i just saw a pic of gerard from the ema's and he has somethig written on his neck, but i can't see the whole word.

Anonymous said...

It sounds that way GS. Has some of you guys wondered that maybe Mayo *wants* you to feel nothing?
You can't let the fucker affect you this much, which is odd coming from me, but still.

farawaysoclose said...

hello everyone!
yeh funny old mood today.
ho hum!

farawaysoclose said...

just put mtv on but missed mcr! typical!

gnothi seauton said...

Well on the plus side I'm really looking forward to meeting up with RW on the 17th. :)

sdock10 said...

oooh I bet it says sdock10!!

Wanna put money on it?

Anonymous said...

Hello faraway. How are you?
I am trying to perk the bloggers' moods up, but it appears it is not working ^_^
Just for putting people in shitty moods Mayo, I would like to kick your ass.

Fimble Star said...

oh gs are you meeting rw. that will be so cool

gnothi seauton said...

Too right Sdock10.

You know he loves ya!

Anonymous said...

i just saw red carpet pics of the ema's. gerard has catholic written on his neck and it looked like frank had a frankenstein mask on.

gnothi seauton said...

Yes FS.
She's flying in to visit and is seeing MCR on the 15th so I said I'd nip to see her in London if she was free. We're meeting on the Saturday. :)

sdock10 said...

awwh BC, thanks for trying to lift our spirits, but it's nice to be numb for a change. I know it will soon give way to manic hysteria....or some other mood I haven't seen in a few days.

sdock10 said...

Catholic? hmmm

I dont F with God, so I think I'll leave that one alone.

Bet he has sdock10 written on his arm though!

capture this void said...

This is about no one in particular.

But instead of getting proper reviews from people, we're getting "Gerard had such and such on his neck. I wonder what this means??!?!?"

I'm so bloody sick of it. The more we acknowledge it, the most often he's going to do it.

I'm in a somewhat bitter mood. For now, i'm just trying to focus on Bob. I really hope he's okay.

gnothi seauton said...

Catholic?

Mmmm, which Catholic tradition is that refering to?

No contraception?

No divorce?

Who cares!

Anonymous said...

Your welcome sd10. Trying is better than nothing at all.
I better get going. Take care guys.

sdock10 said...

Yeah I agree. I hope Bob is okay too.

Bob, if you lurk...TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!! None of this other shit matters at all.

Anonymous said...

is Lyn-Z with MCR?

Anonymous said...

CTV, you made an excellent point. In some ways, we are enabling the bastard, even though sometimes we may not be fully aware of it.

anima said...

Hi everyone!

Mayo, Gerard, MCR have nothing to do with my mood. Just kind of blah and sad today. Can't quite explain it or shake it.

Thanks for trying to cheer us BC. I really appreciate it. No worries though, I will get over this/I always do.

I bet he has "MAYO" written on his ass. :)

Anonymous said...

Get well Bob!

Original Punk J said...

I would like to say I apologize for this cryptic post but I can't. I have my reasons, please understand.

For months now, I've been reading, watching, observing. Something kept bothering me, but I didn't understand. It was like I had 20 puzzle pieces left and couldn't find the one that would bring the others together.

A few nights ago, the missing piece fell into place.

And I did not like what I saw.

I hope to God I am wrong, but if I am not, I offer the following:

Mayo,

Fire.

Destructive, cleansing, frightning, powerful.

It can either sustain life or take it away. We use it to cook the foods we eat, light our way, warm us before we freeze to death. It can also consume us, reducing all to ashes.

Interesting that one of the ways to fight fire is WITH fire, literally and figuartively.

You have been setting brush fires all your life. Bringing out just so much and destroying it, enough to keep a path cleared, until you become entangled again, over and over.

But deep inside, there is one seed that became a huge tangle of vines, black and covered in thorns. You leave it alone, afraid you will be torn open by the sharp points if you try to uproot it. As the years pass, it grows, not only in size, but in menace. If you leave it, it will eventually consume you.

You cannot continue setting small fires.

You have to burn the mountain to the ground.

Only then can you walk a clear path.

The Phoenix does rise from the ashes, love.

Be strong.

Fight fire with fire.

Love you dearly,
L.

Anonymous said...

No problem anima :)

anima said...

Not sure Anon. I think MSI have a show tonight.

farawaysoclose said...

thanks BC.
"catholic".....ok?
yeh i agree about bob also. it would be nice to know exactly whats going on, may be they'll say something later on if they win something and are interviewed.
MSI are playing a gig somewhere else tonight as far as i know. i will keep my eyes pealed though.

Anonymous said...

maybe he had catholic written on his neck for lyn-z. that is her stage outfit. it kind of makes you want to vomit.

gnothi seauton said...

Bye BC and thanks anyway.

I'm like Anima, just a bit blah, but this lot doesn't help at the moment.

farawaysoclose said...

gerard was raised catholic though.
fuck i don't wanna get into what it means to be honest. i can't be arsed.

gnothi seauton said...

And I know I don't need to come here but it's my drug of choice at the moment, I'm weak ;)

Anonymous said...

I can't help but think that those messages are only written to divert attention onto him. Maybe we shouldn't pay too much attention to it. He has been writing messages on himself for a long while now.

sdock10 said...

GS,

me too!!

farawaysoclose said...

just seen them being interviewed.
no bob.
says catholic def on neck.
frankie had green mask pushed up on his head.
mikey and ray didn't speak.
they are performing teenagers. i wanted mama!
looked good actually. nice suits.

toujours said...

l. -- what you wrote to mayo just now, it was chilling and also very powerful.

i'm really glad you and j. are here to put such things into words, and with such heartfelt elegance.

gnothi seauton said...

OP's,

Totally hearing where you're coming from.

They've just been on the red carpet by the way.

Mikey is looking sweet;)

Anonymous said...

He knows what people say, so talking about it will cause more of it.
Right now my mind is on Bob, i think thats all i can focus on now.

So what did they say in the interview?

gnothi seauton said...

SDock10,

I just try not to inhale ;)

Anonymous said...

which is why I'm not going to gel. Bob's condition is more important than that.

sdock10 said...

Right, GS

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Anonymous said...

Frank's Frankenstein mask was cute. Maybe Gerard isn't the only one sending out messages!

Annoyed I missed SS today.

I hope they win!

Anonymous said...

The interview was short, the interviewer said he hoped they win an award and Gerard just shrugged and said yeah it would be nice but it wasn't to important to him. Then Frank interrupted and pointed to the fans and said these guys are our awards. Mikey looked really good. Sad no Bob :(

gnothi seauton said...

We'll watch each other's back.:)

I'll be ready with the coffee when you need it.

capture this void said...

Frank's comment just warmed my heart.

farawaysoclose said...

GS and sdock you are making me laugh!!
by the way you've got to inhale or whats the bloody point!!

sdock10 said...

Cool, GS.

Sounds like we are executing the master plan to a T.

sister midnite said...

Yes, Sdock. They do show movies.
Right now, "Sybil" is the feature film. ((Sound familiar, anyone?))

BC, thanks for trying to lighten the mood. A few of us are just blah today. Not because of Mayo, just because.

CTV, you so nailed it. Bob is away, and all we hear is what Gerard wrote on himself this time. Maybe the train to Nowheresville will make a stop at the EMA's, where I will enter just long enough to Sharpie "THIS SPACE FOR RENT" on Gerard's neck, and "Sdock10" on his forehead. And I'll also hang a "We Want BOB" sign-on-a-string around his neck, then take my leave and re-board the Noweheresville Express for a nice long stupor.

sdock10 said...

It's all about the atmosphere Faraways...the mood.

*puts on shades to hide bloodshot eyes*

sdock10 said...

FUCK YEAH! Sister Midnite

I'd like to see you walk the red carpet in those fierce ass kicking boots of yours!

BAD ASS!

gnothi seauton said...

Frankenstein = Leonard ?

Nah?!

farawaysoclose said...

sister midnite that sounds like a great idea!
and sdock you are still making me laugh!

Anonymous said...

maybe bob is following his solo project he he he. jk

Anonymous said...

Awww, Thats so sweet of Frank


Do you think Bob is at the show and just not on the carpet?

capture this void said...

Anonswers, that totally brought a smile to my face. Thank you. You too, Sister Midnite.

capture this void said...

Gel, he is most likely home, where he belongs. He cannot play with a broken wrist. Why bother drag him on tour?

He deserves this little break.

sdock10 said...

Geradopoly anyone?

Anonymous said...

lol no gnothi, I actually meant frankenstein = modern prometheus

gnothi seauton said...

* lies on back with feet on the wall *

Yeah, whatever Sdock says.

It's all cool.

Anonymous said...

oh gerard...you make my heart burn...oh gerard...

sdock10 said...

gnothi seauton said...
Frankenstein = Leonard ?

Nah?!


LIKE YAHHHH! Hells yeah! We love you FRANKIE!!!

farawaysoclose said...

anon 8.53
that means the same thing.
leonard was in SS's puzzle.

Anonymous said...

i don't mean to sound stupid, but who is Leonard?

gnothi seauton said...

Anon @ 8.53pm

Oh, duh, I never even made that connection!

Christ, is it Friday yet?

Anonymous said...

Gerard would make something burn, but I'm afraid it might not be your heart. You would burn in places you wouldn't want to burn.

BURN MOTHERFUCKER! BURN!

gnothi seauton said...

Leonard was the green skinned zombie in the SS story.

Anonymous said...

Thats true, or perhaps he is in Europe touring with them, but just not playing.
Either way, Bob needs his rest.

Anonymous said...

farawaysoclose, how does it mean the same thing. who is leonard? sorry i don't mean to be annoying.

Anonymous said...

Hi to everyone who is here.

Hope everybody is well.

I know this isn't the topic of discussion right now, but I just have to say that for the first time, I was actualy dissapointed to see a message written on his neck.

- Jade

elena said...

Hello everyone,
Catholic? on his neck?
Lord, that man wants attention.
I still think my friend who's Halloween costume was "Gerard" had it right. Her "Gerard" had "Crying For Attention" Sharpied on her arm.
Yeah that was right on target.

sdock10 said...

You guys,

I must leave now and I'm on my way home to my DIAL UP connection...so, I won't be able to hang in Mayo's blog tonight. Maybe he will post something new!!

GS, keep my spot in the dark smokey, corner warm for me. Deal?


Mayo, Sorry if I miss you again tonight, but I can't leave you comments once I get home.

Love to YOU and you GUYS Always,
S

Anonymous said...

Please so don't say more about Leanord or the story guys.

farawaysoclose said...

well guys i might just go and retire to my sitting room and watch the EMA's for a bit.
i may return during the shit catagories.
but anyway have a good evening and who knows mayo might post a new blog tonight??
better make sure he gets his times right ey!!

gnothi seauton said...

SDock10,

HELL YEAH FRANKIE!!!!

Pass us another blog to inhale love.

Anonymous said...

green skinned zombie? Ok I think i am confusing everyone sorry i brought up the mask i just thought he was possibly letting us know he was the modern prometheus.

gnothi seauton said...

Anon @ 9.03

?

gnothi seauton said...

Ignore, I get it.

farawaysoclose said...

anon.
SS is the modern prometheus.
leonard was the zombie in the puzzle he set us a while back.
gotta go now.
bye everyone.

farawaysoclose said...

sorry notsoanon just noticed what you said. not sure why but erm sorry anyway i guess.
tara.

Anonymous said...

Hey GS.

If your still here that is?

- Jade

Anonymous said...

How was their performance so far?

Anonymous said...

what is going on here? what puzzle?

capture this void said...

Weak, apparently.

Anonymous said...

I have know clue about the puzzle. Im too tired to read the last comments that I missed.

- Jade

Anonymous said...

Hi everybody.
I just got here and I'm already confused. It was that kind of day, though.
How is everyone else?

farawaysoclose said...

not performed yet gel. nelly fertado just won something.
why am i still here!! i am going honestly.
oh tokyo hotel (i think) just beat MCR in best international.
bollox.
anyway i really am off.

gnothi seauton said...

Hey Jade :)

Anonymous said...

Hey GS, FSC, Jade, anybody else I may have missed.

Anonymous said...

Im good thanks star. I've had a really good day.

And yourself?

And GS, how are you :]

- Jade

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hi everybody I was bitter today but I got a new Entertainment weekly with Johnny Depp on the cover.

gnothi seauton said...

Hello Star :)

Was in a pithy mood earlier Jade but Sdock10 gave me a boost so I'm quite chilled at the moment :)

You?

And Star ? You okay?

Anonymous said...

*IGNORE*

^^Sorry, I cant read the comments unless I post something.

- Jade

sister midnite said...

To anybody confused about the Leonard bit:

It was something that happened here a couple of weeks ago. Don't be confused.

Anonymous said...

Ohh thats good then GS.

Did Sdock10 spread his words of wisdom to the crowd this evening?

- Jade

Anonymous said...

Oh thanks for clearing that up SM. I was extremely confused and started to get worried.

- Jade

gnothi seauton said...

Martha Jones,

I was at a sci-fi convention last weekend and this guy was dressed as Jack Sparrow, spitting image of him down to the swagger and voice.

I called out Jack so I could get his photograph and he turned and was like " That's Captain Jack ".

He was too cool.

Hello by the way.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hi GS Johnny looks pissed in the picture and a little dead. Its for the movie Sweeney Todd but its still johnny thats all that matters. I'm still a little sad that I missed SS Both times he showed up.

ergoproxy said...

Morning !

What time was SS comment?

How are we all today?

Anonymous said...

Someone said they finished performing, so nevermind.

Tokio Hotel? That is bullocks

dei gratia said...

Evening, afternoon guys!

How are we all?

I agree with alot of the things being said recently and am sorry to see pale student go.

I haven't watched any concert clips since the Frank shaking and 'vom-scarf'; really don't want to (was prepared to give Bratislava a go but not to be).
Most of the time I have my i-pod on shuffle and skip songs I don't want to hear, and yes recently i've skipped!
I don't have tickets to the latest tour and a big part of me is really not bothered; don't want to be a part of it. It feels sad!

I quote Mustard as I couldn't put it any better:

You're music still moves me. It's just not the same. I question the truth behind it. Should I? Give me a good reason not to after the events that have take place. It used to be all about the music and the message. Why has it become neither one?

I haven't completely lost faith in the band; much of that is due to love and respect for Frank and I feel for the other guys.

I haven't completely lost faith that the problems cannot be turned around or that a certain someone is
able to do so.
I believe we all deserve friendship and support and often that is not just kindness but delivering harsh words and arse kicking or even just sitting back waiting and willing someone to take the steps only they can.

That is why I will still come here.

And also, of course,I still come to speak to all of you; my e-friends that I have come to care so much about!


SS; good to hear from you, you have been here before recently though, haven't you!

gnothi seauton said...

Hi Ergo,

We believe SS landed at 4.27pm.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

I don't remember the times but they should stand out one says this is bullshit at the end and the other you should know it when you see it.

Anonymous said...

Hello DG.

Im Jade, nice meeting you.

I agree with most of what you said, yet I cant force myself to let go. The edges of my fingertips are still hanging on like theres no tomorow.

But anyways, im doing good thanks. And yourself?

- Jade

gnothi seauton said...

Hello DG.

Anonymous said...

I'm better now, GS! I just felt all discombobulated today. I can't wait to see Sweeney Todd!
Hi Ergo!

Anonymous said...

Hello, Ergo.

- Jade

Martha Smith-Jones said...

Hello DG and ep

Anonymous said...

marthajones, does Johnny have that white streak in his hair? I like that!

sister midnite said...

Jade said:
Did Sdock10 spread his words of wisdom to the crowd this evening?

Sdock10 is female, Jade.
It's not a Gerard identity.

Unless there's something our beloved Dr. Nut isn't telling us... O_o

Anonymous said...

Oh Hello Martha.

Sorry I didn't se you there.

Excuse me for being so rude.

- Jade

gnothi seauton said...

Mmmm, everyone's felt a bit like that today, Star.

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