I Hate Swimming
I am barefoot
and the pavement burns
my pale soles.
I begin to shuffle
first to the left
then, right.
Holding each
until I can no longer stand
without wobble.
I would seek shelter
but, that would find
me leaving you
alone, again.
And, I can’t.
Won’t.
Your willful eyes
and your exuberance
stand with me.
I am here
to brave the burn.
p.s. all that stuff about going blind is a lie.
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I would like to credit the photographer and thank her for sharing her work.
Your words are what give value to this space.
Never do that again.
Yes, I am aware.
Art by: Toujours
No Contest
even if no one gets me, if i'm the only one laughing at my jokes, i won't hide myself away from life. it's uncertain and it's dirty and it's fucking exciting, and i want to be a part of all of it.
it's too good to waste in hiding.
toujours
February, 21, 2009 1:27 AM
it's too good to waste in hiding.
toujours
February, 21, 2009 1:27 AM
heart full
Today on my way home from class, I stopped off at the petrol station for some petrol. I paid on my card which wasn’t a lot, and then as I was getting into my car, I saw an old man walking past the building. He had a red and green stripy jumper which was frayed at the ends. He was also wearing some jeans that were dirty and had holes all over.
I sat there and became intrigued by him because I didn’t know what he was doing, so as I sat there and watched him, he continued doing what he set out to do.
He walked past the trash cans and first picked out a cup with some drink still in it (one of the cups that you get from burger king that has coke in it). He then walked over to the next trash can and pulled out the end of a half eaten sandwich. In my shock horror, he ate it and then went to sit on the wall to drink the drink he had found.
I felt sad, I wanted to give him my last $4 that I had but I was told when I was younger that you should never give people money, you should give them something they need or can use because that way, if they had an addiction, they would not be able to use the money for their addiction. So I went into the shop and bought a chicken sandwich from their deli counter and then walked out of the building.
The guy was still sat at the wall drinking his drink so I walked up to him and asked him if he would like this sandwich. He thanked me and said that he was hungry.
I should of felt good after that, doing something for someone else but all I could think of is where his next meal will come from or where in fact he will sleep tonight.
Fimble Star
September 30, 2008 8:08 PM
(Tonight, although I am cold and my feet are sore, my belly is full.)
I sat there and became intrigued by him because I didn’t know what he was doing, so as I sat there and watched him, he continued doing what he set out to do.
He walked past the trash cans and first picked out a cup with some drink still in it (one of the cups that you get from burger king that has coke in it). He then walked over to the next trash can and pulled out the end of a half eaten sandwich. In my shock horror, he ate it and then went to sit on the wall to drink the drink he had found.
I felt sad, I wanted to give him my last $4 that I had but I was told when I was younger that you should never give people money, you should give them something they need or can use because that way, if they had an addiction, they would not be able to use the money for their addiction. So I went into the shop and bought a chicken sandwich from their deli counter and then walked out of the building.
The guy was still sat at the wall drinking his drink so I walked up to him and asked him if he would like this sandwich. He thanked me and said that he was hungry.
I should of felt good after that, doing something for someone else but all I could think of is where his next meal will come from or where in fact he will sleep tonight.
Fimble Star
September 30, 2008 8:08 PM
(Tonight, although I am cold and my feet are sore, my belly is full.)
It helped.
Jennicula,
Thank you for sharing your story. Although it only appeared briefly, I was lucky enough to have caught it.
Once upon a time, for me, that was the best part of this place...having my words related back to me from another's perspective.
And it never mattered to me who said it, just that it meant something to the writer.
Thank you for sharing your story. Although it only appeared briefly, I was lucky enough to have caught it.
Once upon a time, for me, that was the best part of this place...having my words related back to me from another's perspective.
And it never mattered to me who said it, just that it meant something to the writer.
Blog header image by: Anima
I would like to credit the photographer and thank her for sharing her work.
something
Don't let anyone tell you how to live your life. Hold your head up high and be proud of who you are. If you've had a shitty day and you feel like people just don't want you to be happy, and when you find yourself struggling to make it through the day, just keep on believing and keep the faith. Also, from personal experience, don't push people away. When they say they want to help and that they are there for you, let them in. Believe me, I know how fucking scary that thought is, but don't shut others out.
paperheartxx
September 22, 2008 11:07 PM
paperheartxx
September 22, 2008 11:07 PM
Retro-spectacled
Sometimes, when you look back on stuff in your life, you know, the crap that makes you shake your head and say, "Holy shit, what the Hell was I thinking?" it's part of what makes you - you.
I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. I have made small mistakes and really big, fucking scary mistakes. Would I change those mistakes and blunders?
No. Wanna know why?
Because they make me - me. They help make up the person that I am, what I've learned the hard way. Hopefully I've learned from my mistakes and have become a better person for it. And, hopefully I don't repeat those same mistakes. Although, sometimes I repeat variations of certain ones, but I'm working on that. :)
Jennicula
June 11, 2008 11:19 AM
I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. I have made small mistakes and really big, fucking scary mistakes. Would I change those mistakes and blunders?
No. Wanna know why?
Because they make me - me. They help make up the person that I am, what I've learned the hard way. Hopefully I've learned from my mistakes and have become a better person for it. And, hopefully I don't repeat those same mistakes. Although, sometimes I repeat variations of certain ones, but I'm working on that. :)
Jennicula
June 11, 2008 11:19 AM
aloft
Blazing against the sun
like locusts,
samaras swarm the sky
and skitter to an earthly end,
dry
like clever words.
I want to make them fly up,
flip heaven upside down
and dance across the top of hell
and sing your thoughts
to the sound of thunder
that you love so well,
rip open the littered sky
and bathe in the light
or draw across the firmament
the blanket of the night.
In only a day they have
covered the ground,
their brief flight
yielding nothing permanent
on infertile land,
a fleeting moment of swarming glory
that calls to mind our own
short story:
Diamonds and petals,
the loom and the light,
the inkdark moon, foxfire marsh,
an open, waiting hand.
Clever winged seeds
of childhood reminiscent--
and like the idiot grown-up heart,
as stubbornly indehiscent.
Weaver Girl
May 26, 2008 11:27 PM
like locusts,
samaras swarm the sky
and skitter to an earthly end,
dry
like clever words.
I want to make them fly up,
flip heaven upside down
and dance across the top of hell
and sing your thoughts
to the sound of thunder
that you love so well,
rip open the littered sky
and bathe in the light
or draw across the firmament
the blanket of the night.
In only a day they have
covered the ground,
their brief flight
yielding nothing permanent
on infertile land,
a fleeting moment of swarming glory
that calls to mind our own
short story:
Diamonds and petals,
the loom and the light,
the inkdark moon, foxfire marsh,
an open, waiting hand.
Clever winged seeds
of childhood reminiscent--
and like the idiot grown-up heart,
as stubbornly indehiscent.
Weaver Girl
May 26, 2008 11:27 PM
Electric Blue
…today I saw a ulysses butterfly it was in our yard and settled to feed on our hibiscus. They really are fantastically beautiful things, the electric blue is amazing, however as they sit with their wings closed they are rather nondescript and dull. Sometimes people are like that, from the outside they seem unappealing but within there hides an amazing beauty for those lucky enough to see it. I hope you appreciate beauty in all things, and look for it perhaps where others miss it.
ergoproxy
April 29, 2008 4:45 AM
ergoproxy
April 29, 2008 4:45 AM
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL.
I read your post again and suddenly without warning memories of construction paper filled my head. I remembered all the lop-sided flowers my girls made when they were young. Bright blue, yellow and pink flowers that were cut out with blunt end scissors would fill the windows to decorate for Easter. An occasional bunny was attempted but those usually ended up looking like creatures from a horror movie. Flowers were so much easier. I can close my eyes and hear the paper being cut into petals. I can smell the Elmer’s glue squirted on in huge blobs to attach each misshapen petal to form the flowers. We had a huge arts and crafts box full of wonderful items just waiting for their imaginations to turn into something wonderful. In my mind I see my daughters, as they once were, small, blond little girls sitting on the floor surrounded by scraps of paper and other art supplies. They would create their masterpieces then proudly show each other. Oh and Lord the messes that would ensue if the glitter made an appearance. Now, the box is forgotten. I’m not really sure where it even is anymore. The few flowers so lovingly created that survived are faded and dusty and high on a shelf they sit. Time marches on, so many things get left behind.
Today was the first Easter I spent alone. I don’t think it really upset me until I remembered the construction paper flowers. Of course I understand that my daughters are growing up and have lives of their own. But understanding doesn’t make it any easier to accept. I miss my little girls in their frilly Easter dresses. I miss the laughter that filled the house when they found what the Easter Bunny left for them. And I miss making the damn flowers.
Elena
March 24, 2008 3:57 AM
Today was the first Easter I spent alone. I don’t think it really upset me until I remembered the construction paper flowers. Of course I understand that my daughters are growing up and have lives of their own. But understanding doesn’t make it any easier to accept. I miss my little girls in their frilly Easter dresses. I miss the laughter that filled the house when they found what the Easter Bunny left for them. And I miss making the damn flowers.
Elena
March 24, 2008 3:57 AM
From the corner.
I wonder if you noticed
all our friends playing
Some had never tried before
and the result was amazing.
Poems from the corner
from the left and right
We did our best to keep them flowing
Late into this night.
If nothing else was accomplished
I hope we made someone see
How truly beautiful and amazing
a poem can be.
Sdock10
March 13, 2008 11:36 PM
all our friends playing
Some had never tried before
and the result was amazing.
Poems from the corner
from the left and right
We did our best to keep them flowing
Late into this night.
If nothing else was accomplished
I hope we made someone see
How truly beautiful and amazing
a poem can be.
Sdock10
March 13, 2008 11:36 PM
Thank You. Truly.
"This little world has grown around us, out of nothing, and it is a remarkable thing. Even the dark and dirty parts, the violent parts. Humanity will not thrive without passion."
Redrum
March 1, 2008 3:13 AM
Redrum
March 1, 2008 3:13 AM
Uncondensed
Your words are what give value to this space.
Never do that again.
Yes, I am aware.
Character Advocacy.
"Don't ever pretend to be something you're not. You are who you are, and no one can change that. The people who don't like the real you are just gonna have to suck it. Don't take shit from anyone. Don't crumble. Throw a few birds, and walk on.
I'm still trying to do this, so maybe we can work on it together."
mustardisbetter
January 16, 2008 4:48 PM
I'm still trying to do this, so maybe we can work on it together."
mustardisbetter
January 16, 2008 4:48 PM
Art by: Toujours
“I decided to stop pitying myself. Other than my eye, two things aren't paralyzed, my imagination and my memory.”
Jean-Dominique Bauby
Jean-Dominique Bauby
3,282 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 601 – 800 of 3282 Newer› Newest»Lord/Lady Mayofeetz
haha that comment seemed out of place
MAYO IS NUMBER 1!
oh yay smoke!!
*happy Mayo dance*
*pets SS Phantom Kitty, wherever you are*
I miss Mustard too. ♥ Where's Fimblelina?
Mayo you got shoved out of the top spot by a slightly "special" cat who sorta is named after you.
How does that make you feel?
A little weird, I'd guess.
Whooohoo! MEOW!!!
Fimmy is somewhere in England, I'm guessing in a pub, drinking some bears, and driving the boys crazy.
Oh, Phantom is here!
They are kind of special. O_o
Oh and yes, please come out and visit me!!!! I would love you forever and ever. (well, I already do, so...)
Mayo likes to be number 1 and on top...I have a feeling. ;)
Smoke,
Can we go see Anima? Can we please? Please?
Ummm, hellz yeah!
Smoke,
Please repost the pic of the "special" kitties again. I need to show Mama so she can put a face to the name.
Bwah!
I suppose Bryar is MIA.
Did I just say that?!
Where the hell did that come from?!
Sorry Mayo, my bad.
Fim's in England at the pubs?! No fair!
She's definitely in England. I'm just guessing about the pubs. I miss talking to her on a daily basis.
:(
Da Speshul Kittehs
Muwahaha.
Yell yes. You chickies are coming up to visit me next year! And if I go visit my brother in Florida (not sure when), I will swing by to say hi and hit up Fimmy. For sure!
Awww, those are very special kitties! I like the ass lean. Too cute. Animals rule.
anima!! I'm shocked...well not really ;}
Sounds like a great plan, Anima. I have a feeling there are going to be lots of shows that Smoke and I will get to go see so I can't wait to see what the next year is going to hit us with.
Ludo, The Killers, TBS, The Used....awesomeness!
Smoke,
That pic just makes me laugh so hard. Those cats are crazy, crazy, crazy. You can see that little bit of wildness in their eyes.
But the way they just struck the pose for the camera is brilliant!
I know right? They was Mayofeetz is like, "Feed me bitch!" and Phantom is all like, "What? What the hell are you looking at? I iz gonna run away! But I'll be back!"
Wtf did I just say? O_O
OMG. I iz cezy.
Be back in a bit!
Well, I guess I am gonna go chill and prepare myself for the horror that will be Crossroads with Taylor Swift and Def Leppard.
Have a great night, guys!
*macks Anima on the way out*
I love mango!
Hello
Anima I am shocked...you know I don't drink! LOL
dey iz hansom kittehs
Oh "Happy Dance"
Smashing Pumpkins are coming to town!!!
Wat.
Elena.
St Elena The *giggle* Pure?
Doesn't drink?
Wat.
WAT.
*weep*
Hi elena!
Ergo
Thank you, thank you, thank you for my package of goodies.
I love each and every item!!
Amy I hope you are not implying anything bad about the Saint.
I only drink natural beverages.
you are very welcome elena!
so glad I can share it with you, and I have started "Boys Life" and Hubby is intrigued by the sea killer book
lol elena
natural ingredients, naturally brewed.....
Ergo
You will love "Boys Life".
*glances around* Uh, so will Mayo.
I'm not implying.
Alcohol is a natural substance.
It's fermented grapes in a bottle.
Da Pumpkins?
I WANNA GO SEE DA PUMPKINS, TOO!
Have a great night Mayo, SS and errbody! See you guys tomorrow!
goodnight smoke, sweet dreams
Solly, I know you do!
*macks right back*
Hi Elena!!!
Well my friends I gotta go. Just finished primping and it's off to work I go!
Thanks for hanging out!
Mayo, love the new post. Very sweet. The P.S. of course, is my favorite. But whatever!
♥ you guys!
night Smoke
Anima
I'm gonna try to call you tomorrow. We have so much to catch up on.
Alcohol is a natural substance.
You are so correct Amy.
Elena, I just wanted to be sure you had that out, you know?
goodnight Anima sweet dreams and have a great weekend
HI AMY!
HALLO ERGO!
THIS SONG IS STUCK IN MY HEAD AND I CANT GET IT OUT. get it out, get it out! im zlowly turning frensh, oh noooo!
Oh 12 Monkeys is brilliant!!
plus in it they walk past a wall with MUSE posters on it
I have this stuck in my head.
wooo!!
TMBG!!!!
PARTICLE MAN LOL
ergo and amyranth watch this! I laugh so hard! best commercial ever
anon that is bizzare!!!
lol
did you guys watch rugrats?
....and now that song is in my head O_o
I did watch rugrats! I didn't like the grown up one as much though
Im so excited for madagascar 2.
used to watch Rugrats all the time with my girls.
It was funny
ergo me too same! remember reptar? and how shy chucky was.
and how awful Angelica was!
zombie kid likes turtles. ergo watch you will love it!
LOL i still laugh at it!
hey everyone
Ergo,
Just had to run in and tell you that I was so very, very wrong. Def Leppard and Taylor Swift is awesomely great! I can't help but fangirl just a bit over those guys!
I'm sorry I doubted them!
Okay, later guys!
hahahahaah
best "reporter has no idea how to respond" moment!!
HI BC
thanks sdock!
I'll have to try and hear it somehow
Hey BC
How are you?
Hi and bye Solly. Hi ergo, are you the only one here?
Hallo there Amy, if you're still around. Did you get lost in the tub last night? ^_^
amy is having supper
and elena is here too
I think we have a storm coming
DAMN YOU CONFLICTING EDITS.
Okay, I really didn't think that would go through.
So, BC, I just went for a really long swim.
Also, I feel bad for that bunny.
Hey elena. I'm hanging in there, just making some tea.
How about you?
Amy, about the bunny, why?
Been under the weather today, BC.
Okay that is really a weird saying, isn't it? "Under the weather"
no wonder I felt like we had a storm coming!
BC, the bunny in the SKittles commercial. It was traded for a bag of skittles, when all it wanted was love.
You could FEEL it. :(
Ergo, that is the coolest thing I've seen so far tonight.
thanks amy :]
I am about 2 inches down the coast from the point of Qld on the right
there is a severe storm warning for the districts west of us
Just thunderstorms Ergo?
Do you get Monsoons or Pontoons or Typhoons?
I hope you feel better soon Elena. Amy, aww poor bunny. I haven't seen that commercial yet.
Ergo, is that storm heading your way? If it is, be careful.
Thanks BC
How are you feeling?
we have a monsoon season, we call it the wet which is starting now
and the worst storm is cyclone (which is a typhoon but anticlockwise) but they develop over the ocean
this is just good old summer thunder storm, hope it brings some rain
That bunny sure knows how to hold a tune.
thanks BC we're pretty used to it, but always careful
Well I better go tend to sick people.
Talk to you all later, maybe (hopefully)
Take care.
oh elena hope you are all better soon!
love to everyone
see you later
♥
Take care Elena. See you soon.
The new post is a METAPHOR.
How is that not obvious?
Obviously anon
Elena, don't get sick.
Metaphor, Similie, Oxymoron, Onomatopoeia, sometimes I don't know how Mayo writes, and sometimes I don't get him.
But hey, it's fun to read anyway.
Mayonaise: He's like a comic book sometimes.
Mayo Man - The Superhero
SS - The Bookworm.
anon I don't think anyone seriously though he was just standing at a pool
Elena, yes, OBVIOUSLY.
But, yet, it seems to have flown right past a lot of people here.
amy I just had a vision of this little SS bookworm peeking out of a hole in a book
ergoproxy, the chatter here (not at this precise moment), would seem to prove otherwise.
Oh I don't know about that anon.
I think most of us got that, really we did.
It's always interesting to read Mayo's words and run with them.
So many different ways to look at what he writes.
I felt it was saying anon, he is willing to stand by someone or something despite the fact it may hurt, and that he hasn't always done that in the past
but to talk about swimming is fun and I know Mayo likes to inspire thoughts and memories of all kinds and I'm sure he enjoys seeing where his posts take people in their own minds
So, let me get this straight - when you are given a poem with metaphorical meaning, you instead decide to discuss the shallow meaning at the surface?
Why?
(I'm not trying to be rude, I'm truly just curious)
Anonymous said...
Anon 4:55, of course she does but she will just lie. Why do you think they all posted their Leathermouth reviews here? For Frank to see.
November 7, 2008 5:00 PM
Why do you think they all added Leathermouth to their favorite music on their profiles? They would never have listened to a band like Leathermouth if Frank Iero wasn't in the band. Didn't even know about the genre of music. Yet some of them have no problems calling people who still like the music of MCR Gerard fangirls. Amusing and interesting.
I wonder if Frank is going to get called all the names Gerard was called
by the people here who accused GW of being those things? You know
racist
pedophile
bigot
sexist
liar
fake
Prolly not.
Oh and I actually did address this post this morning.
My take on it anyway.
He hasn't dived into the deep end yet.
10:38
I can't tell what side you're on.
Elaborate?
10:38, I haven't shared my thoughts on one of Mayo's posts for a long time. I like coming up with my own meaning, and keeping it to myself because then nobody can tell me whether I'm right or wrong.
Besides, sometimes what strikes me as "the meaning" isn't always something I can put into words.
But that's what's precious to me, is that feeling. I guess I'm selfish.
So, let me get this straight - when you are given a poem with metaphorical meaning, you instead decide to discuss the shallow meaning at the surface?
Why?
(I'm not trying to be rude, I'm truly just curious)
November 7, 2008 10:38 PM
Sounds pretty rude to me. Why don't you share your take on the post?
Anonymous said...
He hasn't dived into the deep end yet.
or perhaps he's gone off the deep end in some way.
well actually anon, and this is just for me, I missed the post and by the time I got there it was late and I wasn't sure how long I'd have on and by this morning the moment had passed, but I did ponder it
and keeping it to myself because then nobody can tell me whether I'm right or wrong
That would be silly of them. The meaning of all art forms is subjective and changes from person to person.
My guess is that the P.S. at the end of the poem is the clue to the whole piece.
You?
I'm on the side of the goose and the gander 10:41. One size fits all. Fairness.
Tonight
I call tails.
I have to go get my daughter I'l be back in a while
10:38 talk about exaggeration, no one called him a pedophile. Don't remember bigot or racist either.
The talk was specifically about the lyrical content of some songs.
"I wonder if Frank is going to get called all the names Gerard was called
by the people here who accused GW of being those things? You know
racist
pedophile
bigot
sexist
liar
fake"
Quotes please where he was called a racist sexist or pedophile. Liar and fake yes.
Goodbye, ergoproxy. And thank you for at least playing along.
The PS was a reference to what he said on the previous post when he told nasty people to go masturbate and leave his friends alone.
p.s. all that stuff about going blind is a lie.
As in - pleasing yourself never hurts?
Anonymous said...
I have no idea why you continue to harass these good people.
If your intention is to provoke some rock-star, you need to look elsewhere.
I know that there are so many out there who would welcome the attention.
Or, you could turn your energy towards something a little more positive.
For instance, you could masturbate. Not only would that kill some time, but it could improve your demeanor, substantially.
November 6, 2008 6:39 PM
Anonymous said...
So, go on now...put a smile on your face, relieve some of that pent up frustration and make this world a better place.
Believe me, I know first-hand it works.
November 6, 2008 6:43 PM
I don't like pork Kapunua, but I like the porch.
November 6, 2008 5:26 PM
See you in a bit Ergo.
He was defending the people who were getting picked on and his PS took credit or blame depending on how you look at it for the remarks.
I'm not going to the work for you 10:50. Read through all post. You'll find them. They may be easier to find at Verita Venom's blog or at discussmayo.
As in relieving your frustrations in a more "positive " way, and not attacking others, elena.
Then if you can't back it up by doing the "work" it's obvious you're making it up. That's a pretty big chip you have on your shoulder. As Mayo would say...... Go play with yourself.
10:53
All of that doesn't prove anything. It could contain a double meaning.
Or, it just further proves my point - the whole post could be a response to said "frustrated" people.
lol Mayo told the bad people to go fuck themselves!
He stood up for people. I'm proud of him.
Oh the mind of Mayo...
Yep anon I think you're probably right.
relieving your frustrations in a more "positive " way, and not attacking others
Mayo's a jerkoff champion.
He'll have you know he fucks himself every day.
Well 11:00, you don't really know that for sure.
Mayo's nickname is Turbo Wrist.
^True, but, anyone who claims they don't, is a liar.
I'm sure other people here remember some of those comments. Maybe one of them can help you if you don't want to take the time to look. I don't save comments from this place and I can't look for you. I'm worn out from playing with myself all day. Got even more worn out playing with others this evening. Try it. You might like it.
Sometimes you have to squeeze the Mayo.
I just realized that my youtube is coming from Australia now.
Ergo, was that you?
Anonymous said...
Then if you can't back it up by doing the "work" it's obvious you're making it up. That's a pretty big chip you have on your shoulder.
November 7, 2008 10:57 PM
Obviously.
I'm sure mrs mayo lends a helping hand.
Oh just great..
Now I have the song "Dancing With Myself" stuck in my head.
Guess it could be worse. It could be "Turning Japaneese."
See you in a bit ergo. Hello various anons.
The comments never directly called him a pedophile or racist (sexist, maybe, I'll give you that), it was more like guilty by association - that his behavior had proven he had turned away from working for people and social issues, not that he had directly BECOME bigoted himself.
When i think about you i touch myself......
Mayo's favorite song is "The Stroke" by Billy Squier.
ya know the one with the marriage license...
Sroke me...stroke me..
My-O favorite song is "How Many Licks" by Lil' Kim.
I think everyone has a favorite sex song, whether it's sexy or it reminds them about sex.
oh no you don't!
I like bad company's
Feel like making love!
If we're talking about masturbation making you blind, you can NOT forget "Longview" by Green Day.
Bite my lip and close my eyes...
There's also Orgy's Stitches.
Which is more about bondage, but masturbation is about bondage in a self-love sort of way.
"Tying yourself to me,
Stitch up my emptiness,
'Cause you're the death of me.
(So precious, loving the thrill)"
"she-bop"
and it's such a cheerful song.
:)
Was just about to head to bed because: early, long, pimportant day tomorrow and I want to sleep lots and lots.
But I refreshed and the current conversation reminded me of a web page listing all the vulgar and euphemistic ways of describing masturbation. That one is for dudes. There's another one for ladies.
Assault on a friendly weapon
Badgering the witness
Calling down for more Mayo
(I swear that is listed there!)
Cheating on your other hand
Dancing round the maypole
Giving yourself a dishonorable discharge
Keeping the Optometrists in business
(LMAO)
Manual override
Organ solo
Polishing the Pope
Raising Stonehenge
Reading poetry
(O_O)
Sex with someone you really love
Shooting for the moon
Spackling the ceiling
Spreading the mayo
(SRSLY U GUISE.)
Spurtin' Bert (O_O)
Staff meeting
Target practice with the yogurt gun
Throwing the hamster against the wall
Visiting Old Faithful
Waxing the dolphin
Yank my Doodle (It's a Dandy)
Zipper Olympics
Those are the funniest ones. ^_^
Good night!
Okay then
Nice talking with everyone tonight. Interesting!
Talk to ya all later.
....poor hamster
Thyis is the girls' one, I don't have time to list all the ones I found hilarious but I remember I laughed at "Clicking the mouse," "Reading the Yellow Pages," "mistressbating" and "dialing the phone."
LOL!
Oh sure, it's all terms for men.
What do girls get?
She-bop (Thanks Teej)
Petting the bunny
Stroking the beaver
Flicking the bean
...
And that's about all that I've heard.
ha! those are hilarious. stonehenge. *snickers*
thanks kapunua, good night. :)
and good night elena. :)
Goodnight again Elena!
We'll have a nicer conversation later, I promise, O Holy One.
finishing the job
lol
Oh come on amy, elena is a married woman with children. I'm sure she can handle the sex talk.
lol @ "Electing the President"
back
and amy i didn't alter your youtube - odd O_O
night elena and anon
hi tj k
Roof Raiser
11:33, she is, but she is St Elena The Pure.
Hallo again Ergo! I can't quite figure it out either.
Hee-Haw with wrinkled Mee-Maw
I'm laughing so hard i can not breath!
All I know, is that to me, you look like you're lots of fun...
hi ergo! did you get my text?
*hugs*
:)
The ear-otic energizer
They all must be immaculate conceptions then amy.
oh i didn't TJ i have no service round here
The belly tempter.
muff maintenance
The spine chiller (my fav)
goodnight elena.
Hi there ergo, TJ *hugs*
11:45, I would expect nothing less from St Elena.
Ah ergo! but most don't have muffs anymore all thanks to modern day waxing techiques ^_^
Hay Teej?
Is Mead similar to wine?
I'm drinking some hommeade stuff now, and I'm pretty sure it's winelike.
11:49 only the brave
*eeeyowza!*
I personally like the word muff, sounds cute & friendly
or smoo
Devo, "Jerkin' Back and Forth"
I think this song is self explanatory O_O
ergo, if you want to wear the lacy, sheer, pretty panties (like me) it's a must ^_~
some of those euphemisms just don't make any kind of sense
I mean "drilling for oil" I can see but "drilling for fish?" and "getting mud for my turtle"??
When I was a little biddy boy
My grandma bought me a cute little toy
Two Silver bells on a string
She told me it was my ding-a-ling-a-ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
When I was little boy In Grammar school
Always went by the very best rule
But Evertime the bell would ring
You'd catch me playing with my ding-a-ling
Once while climbing the garden wall,
Slipped and fell had a very bad fall
I fell so hard I heard birds sing,
But I held on to My ding-a-ling
Once while swimming cross turtle creek
Man them snappers right at my feet
Sure was hard swimming cross that thing
with both hands holding my dingaling
Now this here song it ain't so bad
Prettiest little song that you ever had
And those of you who will not sing
must be playing with your on Ding-a-ling
don't get caught mayo!
here's a biggun
;)
I think a lot of them would be what men think it should be called, I'm sure they would spend a lot more time imagining names (and the rest) than a woman would
i'm sorry i disappeared! i had a mission to complete. don't know if i ahve yet.
amyranth, mead is honey wine, basically.
ergo, my text was basically me going: "omg! i just got my pkg!! you are so nice!! the koala id adorable! the other stuff is neat, too! my cell phone looks snazzy now!! thank you!! :D HUGS"
paraphrased, of course.
thanks. i love all of it. :)
♥
Can't forget this from "HAIR"
~
Sodomy
Fellatio
Cunnilingus
Pederasty
Father, why do these words sound so nasty?
Masturbation
Can be fun
Join the holy orgy
Kama Sutra
Everyone!
I don't like the ones that sound like daily tasks. "Going to the Y"? Great. Now when I'm actually going to exercise and get healthy, males will be snickering behind their hands, insinuating that I need to masturbate instead.
I mean if you're gonna do a dirty thing, use a dirty term!
It certainly is a male thing ergo. I mean they name their appendages!
How many women name their boobs?
oh TJ I am so glad it got to you ok!
elena got hers today too, and so wendy and J & L should have theirs too I hope
I sent a lot of parcels!
12:08, I saw a bra once that could print on your boobs, because there was raised letters on the inside.
Nothing good though. :P
typical though isn't it Amy - A woman's work is never done!
anon I don't know of any, some may but apart from being called "the girls" no names
men are just odd, I mean you don't name your arms at all, but then they don't make a huge proportion of your decisions
XD
i had to let my stepdad have the wrapper for awhile, he was very interested in all the tags and stickers.
:)
my comment about my stepdad made no sense in the context of the topic at hand.
:/
sorry about that.
Oh yes, men are odd!
Oh what a different world it would be if their arms did the thinking instead of relatively minute area of the body :)
Lovin' your Orgy Amy. :D
it did take me a sec to figure out what you were talking about
the parcel wrapper you mean
Lovin' your Hair EP. :D
LOLZ with the "relatively minute area"
Actually, toujours, it's quite frightening in the context of the topic at hand.
And the flame still burns...
And forever fades away...
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