I have not yet entered into a static free zone. Buzz, buzz, buzz…my head is ready to fucking split. I asked him if it still mattered at all.
I am waiting for his reply.
I have been half way around my brain with this shit, and it just keeps coming up the same. And I am repeating myself, here in the dark, not quite alone.
In time.
p.s. patience please, my lovelies...I am listening.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2,146 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 1801 – 2000 of 2146 Newer› Newest»I think I'll go to bed, it's late here, I feel like shit.
It's no fun being bipolar.
xoxo cupcake.... very frightened.
And MAYO?
*flying bear hug*
You deserve it. It's sweet you see some of us at least.
XX cupcake
Bye Cupcake and sweet dreams!
I suppose you can have a kiss & hug from me too, Mayo, although it remains in my blackened heart to be mean. I'm still not convinced of your benevolence but during the MiracleWhip-gate saga I did write that I was glad you'd assembled us all and I stand by that.
Love,
Kass xx
Hey guys;
How is Mayo land today? I hope that everything is well. It feels weird coming back here after a while and not knowing what is going on. I think about you all constantly, and it's really weird actually how much I miss talking to you all on a regular basis.
Mayonaise, you don't know how happy this makes me to hear that you are happy and fine. Are things looking up for you on your end of the line? I sure hope so. I have nothing much to say right now, nothing useful to offer.. I promise, one day I will. But until then..
Everyone, just please know that I care about you all, and every day, I am sending virtual hugs to you all.. in my mind. *winks*
All I have to say is, stay strong, keep on believing..
& Remember..
Love. Faith. Hope.
All my love;
- 007
wow mayo you do care then.
that was very kind of you and very much appreciated by all of us.
elena you made me so sad reading what you've been going through! keep your chin up and do this for yourself, you deserve it. as mothers all we do is give give give and sometimes you've got to do something for yourself regardless of what people think.
i hope you feel more positive today. i'm thinking of you anyway.
ergo and anima i think i've been going through some similar things as you guys. glad i'm not alone with that anyway!
Gerard discusses PANTS, touring and crushes on Triple J in Australia
And if anyone can't download it, I'll post a transcript very soon (I couldn't sleep and I was bored...)
Goodmorning everyone!
Hi Mayo dear. Thanks again for swinging by last night. It really meant a lot to hear from you and especially what you said about Dominic.
Also just to clarify, I only called you fickle because you had your location on the Lush lyrics then you changed it. It's okay though because I see you are lingering on Sdock's post. Plus, I also like that word 'fickle'... it's fun to say. And I especially like saying 'fickle fuck.' ;)
Oh and I found the Messiah I was referencing. It's not the thrash metal band as someone posted.
They are from during the rave/techno days. The song I remember most has this sample: 'Who loves you, and who do you love?'
About them
The song
Here's a fun fact too. "The Messiah, Messiah!" is a sample from Monty Python’s 'Life of Brian.'
.
.
.
.
Elena, I really wish I had the right words that would make you feel better. I love what Ergo, SC, and J had to say to you. Maybe cut and paste what they said and print it out. Save it and re-read it when you are feeling down. Maybe that will help give you strength when you are having trouble finding it within yourself and also to know that you are not alone. My mom spent most of her life pleasing everyone in the family. I never saw that as a good thing. It made her miserable. She needed to take care of herself first. It is not selfish whatsoever. In order to be the best person you can be you need to look out for numero uno. Otherwise you are no good to the people around you. I pray that your family will come around and support you. Maybe if they knew how you felt they would try to change. I'm sending you lots of hugs. Take care of yourself.
TripleJ: Hello there, Jared.
G: Hi, how are you?
TJ: I'm good mate, how are you going?
G: Very good, very good.
TJ: We're getting told that you are a little bit exhausted at this stage considering you've been on the road - well pretty much for the last year or something.
G: Yeah, we've had like little tiny breaks, like one week here, 4 days here. But we've been out for over a year now.
TJ: I know. 'Cause you were here the beginning of this year?
G: Yeah it feels like we were just here but that was a year ago.
TJ: Yeah. But you've been on tour pretty much since then. It must takes it's toll a little bit, how do you keep yourself fresh?
G: Um, I mean the shows are so great it's worth it, you know? And as long as you don't do too many in a row, like at one point we did like 23 in a row and...
TJ: Dude!
G: That was too much. But it's like..the crowds are great. It's really about them..
TJ: I know, Jared, that's the right thing to say, I know. But it must be, bloody hell, there must be nights where you're going, "oh hell, not again."
G: Um, nah, no. It like, honestly, the only time's when you start getting into too many and those are the nights when, you like...you're brain doesn't function properly. Like too many shows in a...like too much of anything, like, is bad, you know?
TJ: Yeah, I know, absolutely. Hey, it has been funny, I've been looking at[..] I've just been looking at some of your interviews and stuff on the internet tonight and it must feel a bit wierd. I know that you've been sober for about three years now, haven't you?
G: Yeah.
TJ: But there's still videos of you pissed on stage and you know, playing soccer pissed inside stadiums and the like. As a man who hasn't touched the booze for a few years what's it feel like to know that there still out there?
G: It actually doesn't bother me. In a weird way, I don't know if this is unhealthy, but I get a little nostalgic for it. I never wanna be that way again but...and there was some definitely pretty awful nights, but..but um. I had some really rough times, but there were some things that I still find pretty funny. It's not like I was, I wasn't the type of guy..I wasn't jumping through plate glass windows and being a jerk to everybody.
TJ: No, you look like you were actually a pretty happy drunk otherwise.
G: I was a pretty happy drunk.
TJ: You did look pretty pissed.
G: Yeah, yeah. I was a pretty happy drunk, so, it just really ultimately took it's toll on me.
P.S. Mayo, I'm glad you are listening you silly fickle fucker.
SS, I miss you. Just thought you should know.
This should link to the interview this time
Thank you Insomniac for posting. :)
On second thought, I don't want to upset anybody by posting the transcript, so if you want it, you can email me at eloise101@comcast.net
three hours of sleep, not enough coffee (in the whole fucking world!), and a bad dream about someone maliciously cutting off my cat's belly fur.
t.g.i.f.?
not bloody likely!
later, mes amies.
That was a nice interview. It may upset some people because he talks about MSI, but it doesn't bother me. (I've said before that I own MSI albums, and I like them; so him talking about them doesn't phase me.) Just a warning though for those of you who don't like them. You might want to skip this interview.
FASC and Anima thank you for your words. I am feeling better this morning. I think letting all the things I said out last night helped.I was always taught to keep things inside. We never discussed personal problems. I am so touched by all the support I've found here. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Mayo sorry I didn't say hello first thing this morning like I usually do. Just wasn't feeling it. Better now so - Hello much happiness to you.
I'm at the store today and hopefully I'll be able to comment but with dial up I'm not sure I'll be able to pull this page for much longer.
Once more - thank you my friends.
Hi Anima!
Talking about MSI doesn't upset me - it's being forced to pay to listen to them that I object to!
Kass xx
Hi Elena,
I'm glad to see you managed to scoop up all your daughters. Honestly, this place is brilliant for venting worries, heartache, frustration, etc... and you sound like you've had a lot on your plate recently!
I remember when I crashed my car - my Mum is pretty highly strung at the best of times, but when I called to tell her I'd been hit by a truck (thankfully at low speed) she was serenity personified on the phone to me so I wouldn't panic, but completely mental with worry at home.
I'm just glad I don't have to worry about any kids for a few years yet!
Love,
Kass xx
Elena, I am so happy to hear that you are feeling better today. We are always here if you need us. I was always taught to keep things inside. We never discussed personal problems. I know exactly what you are talking about. I am happy that you can come here to let some of that off of your chest.
The people here are so damn awesome. We are a lucky bunch to have found each other.
Hi Kass! I agree with you.
Hey Kass - Don't hurry to have kids. I wouldn't trade mine for the world but once you have them the world becomes a very scary place.
Anima you're so right. We are lucky to have this place. It's a lovely warm port during the storm. Speaking of storms we are supposed to have another ice storm today. Well crap!
Damn awesome
Yes we are, and it's a fab thought to kick off the weekend 'cos I'm free in 15 minutes!
Kass xx
Anima where are you in Missouri
Kass, we get a mixture of everything. I'm in same jetstream as Elena (that sounded kind of funny)...
Snow.
Ice.
Sleet.
And sometimes it just mixes all together.
Sometimes the snow stays on the ground for a couple days, some times it only lasts for a day. It will do this off and on for then next few months. Then spring!
St. Louis. Where are you in Kansas? I was born in Blue Springs (just outside of KC).
Kass we get a lot of snow. Too damn much sometimes. If I had to pick between ice or snow I would take the snow. I don't like either. So why am I in Kansas?
Right now I'm in Leavenworth at my book store.
I prefer snow over ice/sleet any day.
I'm not sure where Leavenworth is located. I'll have to look that up.
I haven't looked at the forecast for tonight, but I'm sure if you are getting a storm, we will too.
bye Kass
These are from Kapunua on DM.
She asked that someone post these here.
k said...
Hi guy I just wanted to let you know, that the results weren't good and it's probably cancaerM not suure what I shoul do from here but I wanted to lwt you know and say thank you.
Fri Dec 07, 12:32:00 PM EST
k said...
No they are pretty sure. They just don't know which kind yet. There's a kind you. They can treat and a kind they can't. But I've been having a bad feeling for a while and that's why I was rushing and getting so stressed. So they're going to try and determine which kind it is and then from there, I have to. Try to decide how much I want to do. But I don't have a llot of options.
And I know that to a certain kind of person it's just a dog but you know, not to me.
I guess I just want to make the right choice and not do anything wrong but no matter what I do, it's not going to be easy.
Thank you all again.
Fri Dec 07, 01:15:00 PM EST
k, jules, whichever said...
Thanks guys. Nothing can make it actually better but you guys are here and it's good to know that. One thing you can do if no one minds though, is if one of you can post it at Mayo's . I know there are a few people there who don't come here, so. And I know I don't feel like typing it out all over again later. And then just tell them I said thank you over there as well, for all their support.
Love you too sdock
Fri Dec 07, 01:33:00 PM EST
Let's all keep Trisky girl and Kapunua in our thoughts.
And the thing K was the most worried about, the echo test for Trisky's heart?
That came back normal.
Cruel, bitter irony.
J
kapunua, just read your news -- so awful, so frightening!
all i can do is send you some strength, so consider it sent.
keeping you in my thoughts.
OP's
I just wanted to thank you both again for your kindness towards me last night. Your words made me cry, I did a lot of that last night. Thank you guys it makes me happy to know I have friends here who care.
I'm sending love to Kapunua. This must be such a hard time for her. I wish there was more I could do.
Elena,
You're welcome, darlin'. I just hope you feel better about yourself today.
Remember this quote from the late, great Katharine Hepburn:
"As long as you always do what you want, at least one person is happy."
love you!
J
Marthajones, this is way late, but the name of the song with "I'm a hypocrite I dish it out but I can't take it" is called 'Hypocrite.' (I am terrible with remembering song titles. I had to look it up.)
hello everyone!
hope everyone is good today/tonight??
Rawr!
I am sneaking online from school! =]
How are we today?
Okay, so apparently I have cleared the blogs.
I shall be off to finish my Geography assignment.
Hugs&Kisses;
- 007
k said...
MissT, I thank you so much. I don't believe in those though, because in my experience everything has an explanation based in science, regardless of the type if science--that leaves it open ended. But I know even as I sit here that I will be without my bedt friennd in a very short while. I just. Have to le t that settle in. Thank you though, for that really thoughtful sentiment.
Randomly, my friends at work just started singing Hey Jude to me. I don't even know if they're aware that that is mine and my Mom's song. Little known factN my other nickname that only my immediate family and oldest friends call me, is Jude. Long story. But anyway, I have no idea why I just wrote all of that.
Can someone tell the others over at Mayo's in case they are interested or whatever? Thanks.
You guys are getting me through the day in a weird way.
Fri Dec 07, 03:49:00 PM EST
posted on behalf of K.
Hello Mayo, how are you? Still happy I hope.
I can't begin to tell you how glad I was to see your comment last night. I was so pleased to see that everyone took as much pleasure as me out of what you said. It was very touching and I'm glad that everyone felt the same way.
I was so happy to see all the people (you included) who spoke the word Dominic, it made me so proud to have such wonderful friends.
Once again, I want to thank everyone for being truly amazing wonderful people. I have written a new blog which says it all.
I want to say to Elena that you are a beautiful person and don't ever change into something you are not to make others happpy. You are perfect as you are. If your family memebers don't like it, well, that is their problem cos you have to make yourself happy as long as you don't hurt anyone in the process. And you are not hurting anyone being your new self. Don't feel bad about what others say because you are doing nothing wrong. I wish I were still online for you in your hour of need, I hope you feel better today.
Jade, I hope you are having a better day today. let's face it, it couldn't be any worse sweetie.
Kass, I hope the funeral wasn't too daunting. It feels good to say their name aloud, like you are helping them in some small way.
Hello All.
MissT, I've not been able to come on the last couple of nights; I've just caught up!
I'm so sorry I wasn't here for you. I'll e-mail you something when I get a minute and use it anytime; I love ya,sweetie!
K: my thoughts are with you and Trisky. Stay strong!
Elena: I hope you're daughter is okay!
Last but not least, Mayo!
It was lovely to see you amongst us, you should do it more often.I feel sure you have a lot to offer; I suspect you're quite the sweetie on the quiet.I'm sorry I missed you!
Thanks for supporting MissT.
I'm glad you're well and happy, that's what I wish for you. Keep working through it, we'll keep filling your pages here.
Much love!
How is everyone?
Ha! DG sweetie. You were worried about me, I was worried about you.
I have honestly just emailed you to see if you were OK cos I hadn't seen you for couple of days.
Hey MissT, sweetie!
I'll go check.
OK.
MissT thank you. I am better today thanks to all my friends here. All of you give me strength.
Hello DG
I'm here at the store dealing with people who are slightly strange today for some reason. One just asked me who wrote Gone With The Wind. I tried not to roll my eyes. Okay so I guess not everyone knows. I'm so book snobby sometimes. Its very busy today because we have another storm on the way. They want to have books to snuggle up with. Sounds good to me.
Elena, I'm so glad to hear that you feel better today. I am always here to rant to if you need to. It's funny how I bottle my own troubles up but I'm all ears and hugs to other people.
I love to snuggle down with a good book.
Hey Elena,
How are you feeling today?
Everything was said so well last night....don't know that I could add anything!
I'm here if you need to talk.
Lot of love.
I have been thinking all day about what song makes me cry like a little bitch...
I have a lot of songs, but this one just gets to me. It's by a band that was pretty big in the post-hardcore scene back in the day.
This is their one and only acoustic ballad.
I hope this works.
Endpoint 'Survival Song'
DG, got your email. Thank you so much.
I bet you looked wonderful in the dress but I bet you look wonderful anytime.
MissT, thanks sweetie!
I've gotta pick it up tomorrow; it has to be altered 'cos I'm a short-arse!!!
Have my works xmas 'do' tomorrow night and for once I'm actually looking forward to it!
Snap DG, tomorrow I am going on my "old" works xmas do. I'm looking forward to it, they are a lovely bunch of girls and we have such a laugh.
One of them has beaten breast cancer but recently needed a mystectomy but she never lets it get her down, she is such an inspiration.
Hi DG, sorry for not saying hello. :)
This may be a really random question, but does anyone know about Frank's old tattoo, the flame on his chest? I think it's the one he covered up recently.
The flame is remarkable similar to the logo of a Chicago band that I love. Well this band broke up a while back, but they are playing 3 shows in January/February. One in Jersey, one in Florida, and one in Chicago (I already have my tickets!). I thought maybe he was a fan of them, so I thought I'd ask.
Okay, that was probably a silly question. But you never know what people know about these guys. Right?!
Anima, I'm sorry but I don't know. If you are lucky you may see him there.
I'm sorry guys. I thought that link was the whole song or at least most of it. That sucks. The lyrics are not written anywhere otherwise I would have just posted them. I think I know the whole song, but I don't want to embarrass myself.
Thanks MissT. Maybe some anon poster will know.
I would love to see Frank there. But I think MCR is touring again around that time. Bummer.
Hey guys. What's new?
So Mayo, I see that you joined in on the conversation last night, eh? Nice to see, my friend. What you have said has touched many of us here. You did a nice thing, love. And really, I'm delighted to see that all is well and that you're happy. That's what matters. And thank you for putting a smile of my wifey's face.
*hug for Miss T*
How are you guys?
*A big hut back to my beautiful wife*
How are you sweetie?
I'm well, love. It's a bit cold here. Just returned from the library.
Wow, it's slow today, huh?
Hey, do you happen to understand what the whole 'Fluid' thing is about in Mayo's about me? He deleted the best line, eh?
Sorry CTV, after the last couple of days the fluid thing kind of passed me by.
And yes, it is slow here tonight.
"The one thing I refuse to talk about is my personal life."
Bullshit, Gerard.
Bull fucking shit.
And that's all I've gotta say about the new interviews floating around.
CTV, I wish someone would surgically stitch his lips together cos every new interview is so depressing.
Hey CTV, you okay?
I'm not sure about the 'fluid'.
I read it as 'painting shit' 'fluid' meaning like metaphorical diarrhoea. It's flowing freely, he's 'filling the page' working through stuff/shit.
Good Luck with it Mayo, sweetie!
Oh no DG, painting with poo *sniggers*
What a shitty image to picture *sniggers again*
Maybe he is saying that the 'reality' is fluid as in 'changing.' That's what I thought, but who knows what goes through our dear Mayo's head.
Mayo,
Going along with the 'squits' metaphors.
Of course, you can get meds to stop it but ultimatly it's healthier not to stem the flow, you know; get the shit out,so to speak!
Love ya, dude!
Hey guys!
How is everyone?
I know, right? I wish I didn't read the interview.
He was the one that brought up his wife too. Surprise, surprise. The interviewers were told not to ask about Marilyn Manson, but they were free to discuss his personal life, which would have been on the "Things not to ask Gerard Way" list two years ago as well. But now? Now it's just different and it makes me sad as hell.
dei gratia, how you doin', doll?
Hi PH. I'm good. How are you?
Hey Anima!
I am good. =]
*HUUUG*
I'm sure I missed out on a lot the past few days!
You're probably right, Anima.
I just have a toilet mouth and mind.....it's kind of always given me the painting with poo image!
Yeah, I probably do need help.
I feel sure that somewhere in the art world it has been done, though.
Well, my dear friends. I must go. I will be back hopefully in about 4hours. I will miss you guys!
Hey paperheartxx. How are you?
Hi everyone, how are you?
Miss t and Elena good to see that you are better today. Elena and its good to hear your daughters are safe. Anima thank you for getting the name of the song for me. My dumb ass didn't even think to look it up.
Kapu I'm so sorry to hear about Trisky. My family went through something similar with our dog last year. I hope it ends better for you than us.
I wish I could think of something to say that could make you feel better.
DG, I have a toliet mouth and mind too. We are all good like that around here. ;)
Thanks for the hug PH. *Hugs* to you too.
Bye Anima!! =]
*HUG*
Hey CTV! I am great, how are you? I'm trying to catch up on this blogs events from the past 3 days. =[
*HUG*
Not too bad, CTV,thanks!
Have self-inflicted ills as the result of pre-festive celebrations, I'm afraid. Feel like a pig crapped in my head, but otherwise okay!
Hey Hugmeister....how are you sweet blog angel?
Hey Martha =]
I think I figured out the secret to saving money.. act like you don't have any, then you can't spend the money you "don't" have. =]
Elena, I read your comment. My school and my sisters situation was in a similar situation this year. At my sister's school, they had bag checks for a week and a bit after the threats. At my school, the kid was arrested who made the threat.
I can't even imagine what you are feeling right now about everything in your life. All I can say is, be strong. =] *HUG*
Bye Anima, take care!
Hi Martha.
Hi guys, thanks, and thanks for everything all during today too. I wish I could say it would end well, but it's not going to; I know that. There's no way we have more than a few weeks left together. I get it. I'm just trying to square with it, is all. It's going to take me a while.
Mayo, I want you to know, Ihekoa, you can't bury despair. It is what it is, you just have to ride it out.
Thanks everyone, for hearing me out.
K;
You are one strong woman.
*HUG*
Hello Ph, DG and CTV I'm alright. Bye anima.
Please for the love of God someone shut Gw up.
Hello Martha and paperheart, how are you?
See you later anima.
K, my heart truly goes out to you. Anything you need sweetie just ask.
Hey K!
Much love to you both; treasure the time you have left together. Spoil her rotten.
Thinking of you!
K, I'm so sorry. I really wish there was something I could do.
*tapes GW's mouth shut*
That should do for a while Martha. =]
Hey Miss Tottenham! *HUG*
I am good how are you?
I'm a lot better paperheart, thanks.
I'm so sorry Kapu. I was hoping it wouldn't end this way. My heart goes out to you.
Paperheartxx aka hugmeister blog angel.
Hello!!!!
Miss T, that is good to hear.
I am still worried.
Hey Dei Gratia!! *HUG*
How're you? =]
Not too bad, sweetie!
Flagging a bit now....bed is in order.
Goodnight guys,have a good one!
Goodnight Mayo, sleep tight.
Sorry for all the crap talk....one might say I'm full if it this evening.
Sweet dreams DG!
*HUG*
Love you.
hey did you guys that Mayo change part of his location to almost ready are you.
Goodnight DG, sweet dreams.
paperheart, you don't have to worry about me sweetie, I'll be OK.
Bless you though.
Goodnight DG
Martha, I just saw that.
What is up Mayo's sleeve?
Miss T, I can't help it! *HUG*
*huge hugs for paperheart*
Do you know how amazing you are?
Martha, mayo changed his location last night shortly after his last location.
I get the feeling he is going to tell us who he is or reveal something of important to us. It scares me a little.
Thank you for the info miss t. I'm still worried about this. I'm probably over reacting.
Martha, don't be scared. What if he is going to throw a party? If he does drop some bomb on us, then we have each other to virtually hug, right? =]
Miss T, I'm pretty sure you are amazing-er.
good morning everyone, I won't be onmuch today, saturday and stuff to do
hope you are all well,
really sorry to hear the news Kapunua, thoughts are with you.
I'm sure you'll do your best for her
and MissT after talking yesterday, there is a fucking huntsman spider in the dining room behind me!
ewwwwwwww
Hey Ergo! =]
*HUG*
Hi Ep how are you, besides the spider.
Ph I'm a worrier. I can't help myself. I always think something bad will happen.
Awwh, Martha.
Soon we will find out what Mayo is talking about. =]
*HUG* right back at you.
I'm good thaks MJ the spider unfortunately is going to meet his maker, he'll be pushing up the daisies, off to join the choir invisible
Guys;
Question;
What happened to BC's blogs?
Aw Paperheart, I wanna pinch your sweet little cheeks ha!
Ergo, bash it with a broom!!!!!!!!!
Apart from the huntsman how are you?
Martha, I was a little worried too with the mayo location. I hate when I don't know what to make of it.
Good I hate spiders once they have entered my personal space they are dead.
Well I hope its good what mayo has planned. My mind is running wild. Maybe he will give us each a jar of mayo. with a picture of himself on it. Okay that is really lame.
Paperheart, BC is taking a break from the blogs. You can email her if you like as she posted her email further up the page.
I would cherish that Mayo jar for all of eternity.. =]
missT he has been sprayed, but he kind of fell/ jumped off the wall toward me and I screamed
Thanks Miss T!
I got worried. When I tried emailing her earlier, it wouldn't send. Did she change her address too?
Oh God I know what it is. He's going to write more soft pore corn.
By the way Ph is it still raining men. and miss t I like being your new friend. ere withI have a good time h you guys
Yes paperheart, she changed her email too.
I could email it to you if you'd like.
Oh god Ergo, how fast did you run.
Yes it is Martha.
&& that would be lovely Miss T! I am having trouble finding her address! Then I can email BC. =]
I must go for dinner, I will be back later on.
It is Friday after all!
*HUGS*
All my love;
- 007
I love you Martha.
Martha, more soft pore corn?
^_^
Haha, again, I am off!
xoxoxo
- 007
Party later? ;)
See you later paperheart. I'll get that email to you.
Kapunua,
I wanted to share something with you that I hope helps in some way.
About 5 years ago, I found this not-so-little baby bunny at a flea market. I had two bunnies then, and really didn't have any plans to get another. But this one was different than the others in the cage, he wasn't "cute" or fuzzy like the lops. I have a New Zealand and knew the bunny I was looking at was one of the bigger breeds (he turned out to be a Florida White) and that no one would want him. When I took him out of the cage, he snuggled up under my chin and stayed there.
That was it. I took him home, and named him Sydney.
At first, he didn't want to be touched, and was really skittish. It took at least a year and a half before he felt comfortable with me and J.
But when he did open up, he was the happiest, sweetest bunny you would ever meet. He loved his baths, playing with a towel, his toys, and most of all laying in my lap and being petted. He grew to an astonishing 15 pounds.
One night, he got one of his nails caught in the cage floor and panicked. He jerked his foot and feel sideways, then screamed. I ran to him and got him calmed down, then he seemed to be fine, but he couldn't stand.
We took him to the ER, who told us they wouldn't be able to x-ray until the morning, but they could give him pain meds for the night and I could take him home. I knew he didn't seem to be in any pain, and I was afraid that I knew what that meant. I gave him the meds though, and sat up that night with him, petting him. He kept looking at me, as if he was asking for an explanation, but I didn't have one.
The next day, I took him to his regular vet, who did the x-rays. He had broken his back, toward bottom, and he was completely paralyzied from the waist down. He had no control of his functions.
As someone who knows bunnies, I burst into tears when she told me the news. J. asked the doc what our options were and the vet started crying, and looked at me. "She knows what the options are," she told J. I did. There is nothing that can be done at that point. To keep Sydney would have meant he would have infections for the rest of his life plus the fact he would never walk again. He was just a sweet active bunny and I couldn't do that to him.
I stayed with him at the docs and talked to him, J. and I both did. I explained to him what was going on, and that I loved him so much. I didn't cry while I was in there with him, I made myself smile. So did J. But what got me was that at one point, when I told him what was going to happen, he turned to look at me, straight in the eyes, and nodded.
And I knew right then that he understood, and that he was telling me it's ok. He knew.
It's been almost 3 years now, but we still think about him, especially when Logan, my smallest bunny, snorts at something we say. Syd used to do that all the time, and I think Logan picked up on it!
We take more from them than they do from us, that is for sure, and Syd is still with us in spirit and memory, every day. We cherish the times we had with him, and are thankful I came across this big ball of fur at the right time.
I know Trisky will always be in your heart, and you will have those memories. Keep them with you, and she will always be there.
I love you,
L.
I'm off too, we have an engagement party tonight and are into town to get a present and some stuff I forgot yesterday and I found a little coffee shop that does iced cofee in a slushy machine,it's not quite a starbucks frappaccino but it's close!!
catch up later..
soft core porn lol...
She wolf, I am sorry.
"The one thing I refuse to talk about is my personal life."
???
Is he kidding??
Hello to the ops hello rw and later PH. I'm sorry to hear about your bunny Ops.
I love you too misst and I must learn to write in English because I don't know what that alien speak was that I wrote in my last post.
The punch line to the joke is:
I don't like to talk about my private life.
Hello, guys, how are you?
It seems like it's been a roller-coaster of a week around here, good to bad, great to worse. I'm sorry I haven't been around much this week, the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak!
We've had good news for Trisky, then bad, we've heard from Mayo, but wondering what we are in for, we've not technically heard from SS (although I suspect he's lurked and left a comment here and there), we've had our Family in crisis, pulled together, and found that we are more Family then we ever imagined.
I am proud to count myself part of this Family, and grateful that I came across this place. We found each other for a reason; I am more sure of that than ever.
We may be the "Island of Misfit Toys", but we are better than any cookie-cutter toy they ever put out on the shelves. We are unique, we are special, and we are loved.
We couldn't ask for more.
Love you dearly,
L.
Hi MJ :) Hi & bye, all! I am popping out for a bit. Shall be back on later.
Have a good one!
See you later Ergo, run from the giant spiders.
L, I'm so sorry to hear about your bunny. We never forget our loved one's and the happiness they brought to our lives, no matter what form they took.
My first cat snowy was put to sleep when I was sixteen. We had had her since I was a toddler so I had known her pretty much all my life and couldn't comprehend life without her.
She grew a tumor in her mouth and was having difficulty eating. It was heartbreaking watching her trying to eat out of the side of ther mouth. When mum and dad sat me down and told me that the vet had said that it would be the best thing for her to let go as these tumors could be removed but always came back, I knew they were right. That was my first experience of death.
My parents said that they would take her one day but wouldn't tell me which so that it wouldn't be too upsetting for me dwelling on the fact. I spoilt her rotten for the next few days and one day and came back from school to find her gone.
I sat down and cried with mum and dad. I think they were braver though cos they had the hard job of taking her to the vets. I don't think I could have said goodbye there. I'm glad they did it the way they did.
You are very brave how you handled a sad situation with your bunny. I believe animals know a lot more than some people give them credit for.
I don't envy you what you are going to have to do K But we are all here thinking about youand Trisky. If you need anything, we are here.
Hi L, MJ, Miss T, anybody I missed.
Later, RW!
Thanks, anon. That means a lot to me.
L., thank you for that story. I know that road, too. It's especially hard when they've chosen you.
Mayo, I hope your location portends something nice, because please don't do anything mean tonight.Not that I think you will but just, you know.
Hello star how are ya?
Later RW.
Thank you too, MissT. Everyone, in fact, thank you all.
PLEASE also don't anyone post that Rainbow Bridge thing. I hate that thing.
Kapunua, because there's nothing I can say, here's some lyrics. I thought of you because the school radio station played it on the morning announcements today.
"My Blue Heaven"
Two sides twist and then collide;
You're calling off the guards (Am I coming?)
I'm coming through. (Am I coming?)
Adulterous conditioned to a spin cycled submission,
You know, sometimes it just feels better to give in.
(Sometimes, it just feels better to give in.)
And it's all too familiar
And it happens all the time.
All the cards begin to stack up,
Twisting heartache into fine
Little pieces that avoid an awful crime,
But it's you I can't deny.
(You I can't deny.)
Dull heat rises from the sheets.
I'm both a patient boy,
Well, and a jealous man. (Am I coming?)
My double standardized suspicion
Is remedied, oh, my blue heaven,
Sometimes, it just feels better to give in.
(Sometimes, it just feels better to give in.)
And it's all too familiar
And it happens all the time.
All the cards begin to stack up,
Twisting heartache into fine
Little pieces that avoid an awful crime,
But it's you I can't deny.
(You I can't deny.)
We swing and we sway
As this tiny voice in
My head starts to sing
You're safe, child, you are safe.
(You're safe, child, you are safe.)
You're safe, child, you are safe.
We swing and we sway
As this tiny voice in
My head starts to sing
You're safe, child, you are safe.
You're safe, child, you are ..
safe (safe), safe (safe),
You are safe.
We swing and we sway
As this tiny voice in
My head starts to sing
You're safe, child, you are safe. (Am I coming?)
You're safe, child, you are safe. (Am I --)
Coming through?
Is this all too familiar?
Does it happen all the time?
I'm just asking you to hear me.
Could you please, just once, just hear me?
More then anything you wanted to be right.
Still it's you, you, it's you I can't deny.
(You I can't deny.)
It's you I can't deny.
Hi L, hi star, how are you?
Martha, I loved that alien speak. You don't have to talk about your private life, not everyone likes to do so. Just knowing you are here makes me smile.
I'm good Miss T, how are you tonight?
How are you MJ?
hello m'loves
Thank you Star, that song is so beautiful in any context.
Hey, bitter revenge, how are you?
Thank you miss t. The private life thing was about what Rw was saying about GW. But yeah i try not to talk to much about my private life too so it works either way.
Star I'm alright, Br how are you?
They do, Miss T, I am sure of that. I am glad you are feeling some better today.
I will be leaving on Sunday to go to my Mum's for a few days again. She is having cataract surgery on the other eye Monday, so I will be with her until at least Wed.
Love ya,
L.
That's cool martha *smile*
I'm good star, thank you.
I'm good MJ.
L,
Is your mom very far away?
Best wishes to your Ma, L.
L, send your mum my best wishes.
I hope we don't have a repeat performance of what happened last time you were away. Though it would have to be a million to one for another house to burn down surely.
Thanks, K.
Star, about 2 and 1/2 hours. Up with the panthers and the bears! She turns 79 on the 11th and her surgery is on the 10th.
Happy Birthday to her!
Actually, she is looking forward to getting this done. She can see much better out of the one they did last month, and she wants to be able to drive again.
At least safely. :)
L.
My FIL finally got his eyes done (cataracts, not plastic surgery) recently and his driving safety has increased immeasureably--he still scares the crap out of me on the interstate though. :)
I hope not, Miss T.!
My niece found a new house and moved last week. She is doing pretty good all things considering.
But no more of that, I hope!
"Nice things, nice things, nice things..."
Love ya,
L.
Good evening Mayo.
Good evening everyone.
I'm not stoping , just a few things to say.
K - my thoughts are with you and Trisky. So sorry to hear the news.
Elena - sometimes it feels as if you are carrying the world on your shoulders doesn't it? Sit them down and talk to them, they may just listen. I'm always around if you need to talk.
OP L - I hope everything goes okay with your Mum's surgery.
To everyone in general, hello and I hope you are all well.
And finally to Mayo,
Your comment to Miss T meant more than you could possibly imagine. A few words can mean the world. Thankyou.
P.S It's good to know that you are well :)
Gadzooks, I forgot ...
good night and...
TTFN
Best wishs to L's mama.
Kapunua, I am so deeply sorry to hear your news about Trisky. I am moved to tears.
The unconditional love and companionship of any animal is a precious gift and my heart goes out to you. Please know you are both in my thoughts during this difficult time.
Thank you, GS, and thank you, anonymous. Everything you say means a lot to me, I hope you know that. I mean I hope you all know that.
I just don't know what to do with myself tonight. I wish someone would punch me in the head and knock me out.
Can I please ask, what happened to Miss T? I appear to be out of the loop.
Anon,
The anniversary of her cousin's death was 3 years day before yesterday. She was really upset and questioning her own life. She had a really hard time.
Do you mind speaking the name "Dominic" out loud for her cousin?
L.
anima said...
This may be a really random question, but does anyone know about Frank's old tattoo, the flame on his chest? I think it's the one he covered up recently.
The flame is remarkable similar to the logo of a Chicago band that I love. Well this band broke up a while back, but they are playing 3 shows in January/February. One in Jersey, one in Florida, and one in Chicago (I already have my tickets!). I thought maybe he was a fan of them, so I thought I'd ask.
Okay, that was probably a silly question. But you never know what people know about these guys. Right?!
Word on the street is they have added another Chicago date, Anima, my friend.
Goodnight GS
SS, is that you?
Goodnight GS, sweet dreams.
Anon, I am here. I had a minor breakdown and suicidal moment but the amazing people on this blog were here for me. I cannot thank them enough. Special doesn't even begin to cover what they are.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Kapu, I... ah FUCK.
Okay, Trisky. Goddamnit, why can't there be a cure for dog cancer?
Fuck, this is like fucking Harley all over again.
Goddamn Christ.
-A
Miss t you are special to us to.
I'm sneaking on really quick. Weird timing considering there is news about the chicago band. Once I got my tickets, I went into a daze. What is the new date they added and where? Actually, I will just go look it up. Thanks for the heads up anon.
*Goes back to catching up as fast as I can.
Hey everyone, L's off and I'm on. How are we all hanging tonight?
J
Hi amy how are you?
Amyranth, there are treatments for a lot of types of cancer in dogs. It's just that this isn't one of those types.
Hello again Anima.
Martha, You know I love you. My arms are reaching out to hug you, I'm having to stand on tiptoes to reach.
K, words can't express how sad I feel for you right now. I couldn't eat my tea cos my stomach was in turmoil.
Hello J, how are you?
Hello Amyranth, how are you?
Here is a hug right back to you Miss t and Kapu her is one for you and your dogie
Hi Miss T, how was your day today? Any better?
Hi K, honey, are you ok? Is Trisky home with you?
J
Kapunua, I am so sorry. My heart is really breaking for you. But PH is right, you are strong. And if you ever feel week, you know we are here and so are friends at home. Give Trisky a kiss for me.
L, I wish your mom all the best for her surgery. Have a safe trip too.
Hey MJ.
Kapu - I know. Harley had a Ceruminous Wax Gland Tumor, which was operable but would have cored out the majority of his eardrum.
It didn't matter, because after we found that out, the lump we'd had removed from his back tested for cancer cells too. He was shot through with it everywhere.
God. What kind of world is this now? Only the most loving and devoted of creatures on this planet ...
-A
Shit! I forgot to say hi to J. Hi J how are you?
Hey MissT, hiya everyone else!
-A
Hey guys, thanks again. Trisky is home with me, J. That's where I plan on keeping her. I'm going to schedule an appointment with a holistic doctor but that will mostly be for pain management. And then I'm going to also take her to the ocean once, like i always promised her I would. But other than that she will be at home.
Anima, L says "thank you", and she will be careful.
She also says thanks to everyone else who gave their best wishes.
J
J, I feel much better thank you. My swollen eyes have even gone down some.
I have sent out kisses to all the people who wrote lovely things on my blog. And I have dedicated the new blog to everyone.
Anima, thank you. Amyranth, I am so sorry. It is the hardest thing in the world. I hate to say this (I don't, actually,) but there are people I'd let go sooner than I would my dogs. I guess I know a few people who feel the same way, but I'm brave enough to say it in public. ^_~
I hope that was SS. That would be really nice.
Hi everyone! I'm all caught up, but I have to leave again. So if I run out quickly that is why.
K - still thinking about you. MissT and Elena too. I just want everyone to be okay. That's why you have to all that faith, love, and hope; it makes these situations a little bit more bearable.
Hey MJ, I see you there. *waves*
K, that's great that she's at home. I love the idea of the ocean. It's so calming; Trisky will love it. Good luck with the holistic treatment.
Wow. What a week.
J
You Know I was just thinking about my family dog and it is almost the same story as Kapu. He was walking funny and having trouble breathing so we took him to the vet. They did x rays found and found a lump. Than we found out it was cancer and that it had spread through his whole body there was nothing we could do.
I'm with you there K. people can be mean and vindictive, animals never are. Animals never set out to be mean to you on purpose, in that respect they are better than people.
Anon, I just checked and that is great news. I feel really happy for them.
I think cancer is the most evil thing in the world.
"there are people I'd let go sooner than I would my dogs." You speak the truth.
I need to run. I will be back later. Love to all of you!
I have always been more fond of animals than people.
Miss T, I have to go with you on that one.
My dad had cancer, acute leukemia; it was actually a form of cancer that usually only young children contract. From time of diagnosis until he passed, it was 5 months. He went through chemo 3 or 4 times but all it did was make him feel nauseous and hurt, and weaken his veins and blood vessels. In fact, it wasn't the cancer itself that killed him, it was an aneurysm that he suffered b/c of the weakened blood vessels.
He was 65. That was 20 years ago. Man, I miss him.
J
See you later anima and thank you for the song title. Helle entropy how are you. Yes animals are way bettter than most humans.
Hey guys, I am back, but just for a bit. I am going with my friend to see "Enchanted" tonight. =]
Hey Entropy, nice to see you.
Speaking of animals over humans, sometimes I get more intelligent conversation from my cats than I do from random people I meet. How ironic is that?
J
Hi Bubbles, you working girl you! How's life in the fast lane at A&W?
J
I'm so sorry J. That's awful. The word cancer, it just makes me cringe and shiver. I wish they could cure it, I wish they could just find the gene that switches it off once and for all.
Hi Ph how are you? That sound like fun.
J I'm sorry to hear about your father. My mom found out she had cancer in February right after my birthday. It was to far along so they couldn't do anything. She died in May.
Hey J! *HUG*
I've missed you lots!! =]
Working is pretty good, except for impatient customers who can eat enough to feed an army!!
How are you? =]
J
My dad died of liver cancer just over a year ago. They had no idea what was wrong with him until it was too late. I was at the hospital every day. He passed when I took a break and went to get something to eat with my girls. We were in the hospital cafeteria when I heard my name paged. I knew then. He left when I was gone.
Hey Martha =]
Guys; I am sorry, but I cannot participate in this whole cancer discussion. It's too much of a touchy subject for me. I shall observe from afar. =]
Oh my god, SS I have just seen your page. Thank you so much.
I am overwhelmed. I can't breathe. You people are amazing.
I love you all.
It was ss
Miss T--
Go look at SS's blogpage.
J
Post a Comment