I am sitting at a table with friends, it is dark and loud. I am bored. I am absently searching for something affecting to distract me, when I spot myself sitting across the room. I am at a table with some friends…and I am staring right back at myself. I am unable to look away. The gaze between us has me transfixed. Then he, the other me, shuns me with a smirk and joins the conversation at his table. He is speaking, and his hands are gesturing along with his alluring tale. His friends are captivated by the unconstrained other me. I envy his ease. Now I am alone at my table and I am singing to the other me. My song is pleading for him to hear, to once again find me, but he does not. And just as I am about to stop singing, you grab my hand and pull me up from my chair, and I wake up.
p.s. it is because the light reflected from painted glass is ambiguous. mirror me in your words, and that is where I find clarity. as do you, in each others.
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2,692 comments:
1 – 200 of 2692 Newer› Newest»Hello Mayo. How are you today?
Thanks for the new blog.
Do you crave to be this other more confidant you? The you that you catch glimpses of occasionally.
We all feel this way honey. Only you can make it so.
It's hard when we see in others what we so desperately want to see in ourselves.
I can't offer a cure for that, or even a mild sedative.
-Amyranth
Hopefully the two Mayo's will join and there will be an end to all this drama.
Sister Midnite said...
Hopefully the two Mayo's will join and there will be an end to all this drama.
Or, we'll have a horrible blob-like creature.
Hrm.
-Amyranth
And just as I am about to stop singing, you grab my hand and pull me up from my chair, and I wake up.
Are we the one's that are leading you back to reality?
mayo, do you envy that other self? which one do you think is more real?
regardless, the you that we meet with here is a treasured friend, whether you are regaling us with tales or sitting silent and grinning along.
this is the table you built, but together, we have all made it a place for feasting.
(back to work!)
Mayo, I definitely know how you feel. The duality in us all can sometimes surprise and confuse.
I often feel as you do in this post. Sometimes I look at pictures of myself a few years ago and remember someone so different. I miss that person and envy her. I wish I could be her again. I marvel at how fun and full of life she was.
I would do anything to be that person again. I would love to have those goals, dreams and lust for life once more. These days feel trapped and I don't know how to get back to the other me. But at least I realize that I have changed.
It seems like you have as well. Do you miss the old you? You may not be that exact same person again but you can always try to get some of that back.
Are we the ones who wake you up, take you by the hand and lead you to these realizations? If so, I'm proud to be someone who can help you. If it's someone else, I'm glad that you have that person.
No matter who you are, I have come to love you, mayo.
I think...
I think he wants to be that confident person. I think there is a co-dependency that is not assisting that self-confidence he needs.
I think Mayo needs to break the mirror.
-Amyranth
Mayo,
Our own voices are the easiest to drown out, but they ring the loudest in our own ears. Sometimes I want to make myself shut up. Most of the time I am wandering aimlessly and I want myself to find me. How did I get here? Where did you go?
But most of the time, I convince myself that everything is going to be okay. Do I believe myself?
Yeah, sometimes I think I do.
Love to YOU Always,
S
p.s. Can I sit at that table with you? We could make beautiful music together.
Good for you, Mayo, you are trying to find your inner-strength. It's a tough journey, that self-awareness. All the obstacles found are usually yourself. Keep singing, at some point the other you will hear the song and join in.
Alright, time for me to run.
Mayo, check out my livejournal. There's something there for you.
Everyone else, I'll be back later tonight, seeing as I don't have tickets to the DKM concert. Fufufu.
-Amyranth.
I really wish could come up with something meaningful to tell you, Mayo. The old "hang in there" phrase seems trite and doesn't help much too much.
But, the fact that you can see the difference between the two is something that many people are never able to do.
Self awareness is a blessing and a curse.
I have a new interest.
Oddly enough, the more Mayo posts, the more I realize that we are very alike in many ways.
what is this new interest anon?
Hello dear Mayo, I am happy to see you are still with us.
Your blog seems troubling. Yet familiar, I too have experienced this situation. Many times.
anyone notice this on Mayo's profile?
Interests
Why do you think we have all assembled here? -Amyranth November 8 2007 5:00 PM
Mayo,
I hope you know how much you mean to all of us here and how much we have come to mean to each other.
Please don't ever forget that you have a crazy, beautiful bunch of messed of individuals who love you dearly.
Anon at 5:54....or should I say Mayo since you have put that on your profile....are you saying that Amyranth is your new interest?
Ok, you can see how messed up I am that I can't even type messed UP!
All of us have another "US" inside. The way we are and the way we want to be. Sometimes the way we want to be was once the dominant one. But somehow that person gets shoved back deep inside. Remember the way you want to be, the one you want to be, is still there. You just have to listen to your heart cause the heart is the keeper of all our wants and desires. We hear you Mayo, we understand. You are trying to find that person and so are we. Much love to you.
Amyranth, excellent!
Mayo, I can't speak for anybody else here. I can only say that I'm drawn here. In the beginning it was your words alone. Now it's your words and the comments that follow. It's a weird little e-family full of funny, crazy, angry, lovable creatures that I like to call my friends. For that, I thank you.
Amyranth asked:
Why do you think we have all assembled here?
Well Mayo, I came here through worry regarding the behaviour of a certain individual. I came here in the hope of understanding a little about what was occuring within my favourite band.
It's been an interesting journey these last couple of months. I can't say I'm any the wiser on my initial interest but during my time here, I've met some wonderful people. I guess that is why I keep coming back.
Thank you for that Mayo.
Honestly, I come here because it makes me both sane and insane. I need to be both in order to survive.
Mayo Mafia??
Do you like our name or could we do better?
Amyranth, just so you know, I have added you as a friend on LJ
I orginally came here because I think you're a great writer, Mayo. Seriously, I'd read your shopping list for Target. I stayed because everyone else was so warm and welcoming. I feel like I'm part of a little gang that may disagree, but ultimately cares about each other.
Mayo, may I ask why do you come here?
I came for love
I stay for friends
m.
Hello m, How are you today?
It's very nice to hear that you stay for the same reasons many of us here have stated.
It's nice to make new friends isn't it?
miss t
i sometimes believe friends are more important than lovers
m.
hello everyone,
hello mayo,
Your answer to your interest is the p.s. isn't it? I have always loved your p.s. and I think I finally have figured one out.
-VM
m,
lovers come and go but good friends are here forever.
I come here because I enjoy websites like rotten.com.
m. I agree.
I totally agree m. The qualities that we find in our friends are usually very different than what we see in lovers.
MissT: I'm trying to slide in that sentence at work today, so far nobody's provoked me. Dammit. I'll probably have a great day and not need it. Damn my luck.
Star, I was lucky. I married my best friend. He makes me laugh, rubs my back, runs away when I yell. He knows all my shit and loves me for it.
To Mayo:
Don't lose sight of who you want to be, but make sure that it's what you want, not what others expect of you. You don't need anyone's approval - not even ours. Yes, sometimes you can get a clearer picture of who you are by seeing yourself through the eyes of others, but, ultimately, it is yourself that you have to live with. You are the only person who can never, ever leave you.
To the others:
I've been lurking for a while but have been hesitant to post. I hope you don't consider this an intrusion.
Don't worry Jen, you'll get a chance.
You can call it me if it makes you feel better ha!
Good afternoon Mayonaise. How are you? I have to admit, this new post reminds me of one of SS's blogs before he deleted them a while back.
Could this post be a resemblance to it?
Mayonaise, it appears to me that you envy your other self, supposedly because they appear to be more confident and outspoken than your own self. Sometimes I struggle with that part of myself as well. You know that.
No cure or medication will cure this. Only you have the power to find the confidence deep within yourself once again. Find it.
As for why I am here, my reason is similar to everyone else's. I care about you.
m, it is so good to see you again. How are you?
Jen, you are very lucky.
Hi nimble_soles, how are you?
Bleeding Chaos said...
Good afternoon Mayonaise. How are you? I have to admit, this new post reminds me of one of SS's blogs before he deleted them a while back.
How so? I see no similarity, please would you be kind enough to elaborate further?
Yes, MissT, I am very lucky. He even asks me "So, how's Mayo today?"
Jennicula,you are totally right! My husband is my best friend too. We just really genuinely liked each other's personalities when we met, and then everything else fell into place. He is my favorite person ever to hang out with.
M, I really hope that you do think of us as friends.
Jen, star, you two are truely blessed. I am envious.
m,
maybe you just haven't found the right lover.
I come here for diversion. Life can be awfully consuming at times. The people here have so many thoughful things to say. I don't post often, but I am here alot.
This is like therapy for me.
Thnaks to you and everyone!
Anonymous, well, a while back, SS had posting a few blogs, and I came across one that was somewhat similar to this one where the discussion of friends were mentioned. This post reminded me of it
My husband knows entirely too much about My Chem from me. We got lost and ended up in Belleville the other night.
He turns to me and hands me his phone, which has internet on it, and says "Go to you pal's blog and ask how we get to Route 21."
Star, I think that's great. People look at me weird when I tell them that I love to hang out with my husband. While I joke constantly at his expense, I really wouldn't trade him for anybody else.
Good afternoon/evening everyone. How are you?
SS always speaks highly of friendship.
Mayo,
Before I go into anything else, please take a moment to notice what used to be OUR tagname. L has decided to stop writing here, because she feels she has not made any kind of impression. She says she can see no difference in your words, actions, nothing. She feels her presence here has been fruitless, even after all the personal things she has revealed. To you, and to everyone. She says she still respects the band and will support you all. She still loves you, Gerard. But she feels like you've ignored all her advice, her concern, anything she's ever tried to say to you. Apparently, since you haven't done anything to make yourself better after reading everybody's heartfelt words, we could all say that nothing we say or do will impress itself upon you.
And now Frank's had to sell his soul to the Devil in order to keep you happy. ARE you happy? Getting everything you want, are you?
Don't expect ME to leave you alone, because I will not. I will nag at you day and night if I have to, if only to get you to hear that the people you call "friends" just are "not feeling the love".
Prove to me that you love us. Prove to L she hasn't been wasting her breath. Talk to us, straight up, no more bullshit about sitting at tables and looking at yourself. We are all around you, talking to you, and you are fucking ignoring us to look at your own face.
I'm not even going to try to decipher what you wrote today. Where were you yesterday when Frank needed you? Did you come here and defend him? Hell no. What kind of friend lets his friend go under three times?
I will never give up on Frank. I'm going to be here, talking to him, even if I choose to ignore YOU. But don't think I'll completely ignore you, no way. I still love you too, but right now I could beat you and feel good about it.
L says that you will still be in her prayers every day, that doesn't change.
By the way, L was not chased away. She walked away of her own volition.
J.
I'm good BC. Are you more chipper today?
How are you doing, BC?
I am doing much better today Miss T. Thank you. How are you? Last night at Mayo's I did something incredible. I was talking to myself! :D
I am doing pretty good Star. How about you?
m, are you still here?
BC
I am well, thank you for asking
lovers and friends
two different entities
unless you are really lucky
m.
Well said m,
some of us have never been that lucky.
That is good to hear, m. Are you going to stay with us for a while?
I'm good, BC.
Yes m,
hang around.
We are all friends here.
Hi, misstottenham. I am very well today, albeit a bit bleary-eyed from a bout of insomnia last night. Thanks for asking.
dear BC
i shall observe
carry on.
m.
That's good to hear star.
Urgh nimble,
I hate not getting enough sleep.
Thank you m.
Mayo,
I come here for you and me. Plain and simple. I hope that what I say can somehow help you or provide you with a different way of looking at things. Clarity? Perhaps. I just want you to know that someone does understand.
I come here to find myself. When I talk to you, I always feel like I trying to speak loud enough for myself to hear. Above all my own bullshit. You make me look at those deep, dark corners of my soul. You force me to look in the mirror. And I'm figuring out, that sdock10 is not such an ugly person afterall. And I have found the BEST people I have ever met in my entire life. I love them all dearly.
Thank you...I will be forever indebted to you for allowing me to come here and release.
Love to You Always,
S
p.s. You're never alone.
Miss T, your time just hasn't come yet. My husbnad and I both thought we'd
be in our parents' basements forever, then we met. I got married when I was 33.
My cousin is 37 and just met someone and it's going great.
WOW. The basement comment is so Jersey isn't it?!
Ha star! Does everyone in Jersey live in a basement?
Miss T, rahaha!
Yeah, honestly. The oldest or only child usually gets dibs on the basement, cause it's bigger and a cool hangout.
I still can't adjust to windows and sunlight in a bedoom after my basement.
My husband says we're used to sleeping in a crypt!
My ex-boyfriend set me up on a blind-date with my (now) husband. Sparks didn't fly. It was a slow burn. Come to think of it, we did meet in a basement. hmmm.
No daylight eh? I hope you don't smell all musty ha!
My Gran had a cellar at her house which was SOOOOOOOOO creepy. I would never go down alone.
I come in peace as well.
Wishing you all a great day and good mental health...
Rose...
Jennicula, did you really meet in a basement?! That's fantastic! Was it in Jersey?
Hello Rose, how are you?
What is with all the basements ha!
Miss T, I did develop an allergy to mold from living down there!
You don't paint a good picture of your basement days star.
“mirror me in your words”
See, Mayo, I knew you liked mirrors. Yeah, I just had to go there.
No, but seriously I get it. We have so much more in common than you realize.
sdock10 said...
Mayo,
I hope you know how much you mean to all of us here and how much we have come to mean to each other.
Please don't ever forget that you have a crazy, beautiful bunch of messed of individuals who love you dearly.
November 8, 2007 5:57 PM
This is the truth.
Hello Princess Smoke! How are ya?
No, Miss T, it was pretty nice. I used to sleep like a rock down there because it was so quiet.
Hello there smoke. How are you?
How is everyone else doing?
That's good star. Sounds like I could do with a basement myself. I could do with some good sleep.
Last night was soooooo windy. It rained too and the wind blew the rain against my window so hard it sounded like someone was shooting bullets at my window.
Original Punks J just told us that L isn't going to post anymore, and no one seems to care.
You know what? I DO care.
In fact, I think I'll follow L out.
Hello MissTottenham...
Hello all...
R.
do it then bye bye
Sis M, don't leave.
I hope L changes her mind and comes back. I guess right now she needs a break away from here.
Hello there Rose. It is good to hear from you again.
Sister M, you bet your booty that we do care
R, are you Rose?
Anonymous, what is your problem?
Sister Midnite,
L and I both thank you for your notice, and your support. We love you dearly, and invite you to our blog any time you want to come.
Miss T, L isn't taking a break. She's gone.
J.
BC
Pay that anon no attention
it is a shame indeed that 'L' has decided to leave
sincerity is hard to come by,
hopefully she will return when the time is right.
m.
Hi R.
I really didn't know how to respond to J's post.
I felt awkward,to be honest. When that happens, even in real life, I just don't say anything, which is probably not right.
Sis Midnite, do not leave. I hope L returns. We DO care!
And Anon at 7.01pm,
Fuck you, and the weasel you rode in on.
J.
Hi everyone.
Sis Midnite, I do care. I hope L. comes back. I hope you stick around.
Don’t give up just yet.
Will be back later,
S&V20
Im so sorry J,
Send her all our love.
Let's hope so m. It's a shame but she has given her reasons.
Thank you m. Yes, it is sad that L decided to leave, I wish her the best of luck, but at the same time, it is difficult to keep the faith going.
Why did L leave?
I agree BC. Sometimes you get the feeling you are just flogging a dead horse.
Oh Mayo!
That man in the mirror is you!
I believe that he will find you and so must you.
Keep singing and I will keep praying.
Lots of Love.
Hi, I haven't been on in like a week cuz my internet service was down. I know I've missed a lot...
Rose
Hi guys!
Going back to catch up!
See you later!
Read what I posted initially on this entry. That's all the explanation needed.
J.
Yeah it is, Miss T. It can be quite daunting.
Mayo, the other you, the one you envy, is surrounded by friends and is confident in manner.
Maybe you need to acknowledge your friends more. Absorb their company. Then maybe, you might find a little common ground between the two you's.
Hold on here. No one is leaving here. Not if I can help it.
We need you here. I need you.
You are all so very important to me and I love you all so much.
Just take some time and think about it, please.
J, tell L that Mayo may not be heeding her words but we are. We want her back. We miss her.
We love you too sd10. Miss T, I agree. Mayonaise is revealing his feelings, but yet, he does not allow himself to take his own advice. A two edged sword, perhaps? Friends are more infinitely precious than gold, my dear. Allow yourself to learn how to make amends and find redemption.
damn it!!! i just wrote a fucking long reply and this goddamn stupid blogger fucked up and its lost. ohwell back to try and write it again grrrrrrrrrr
I'm going for now, I have errands to run. I'll be back later tonight.
Shitsubou, if you decide to come back, don't leave until I get here.
Mayo, whatever.
L says she, too, will be with us in spirit.
Maybe Sister Midnite will be, too.
Me--I don't know what to say. How about...
Motherfuckin' sonofabitch.
J.
Take care J and I wish L the best of luck. She is always welcomed here.
Enjoy your day.
See you later J.
I think Mayo not only listens but he takes more advice than some give him credit for.
Let me again remind you all that this is HIS blog. He allows us to come here express, vent, reply, and release.
Sometimes you just have to believe...
Sister Midnite, You are not leaving.
L & J, We need BOTH of you, so you are not leaving either.
I'll be back later to sort this whole mess out.
Love,
S
Take care sd10.
'
m, are you still here?
What is this about people leaving?
Shouldn't this new blog be making people want to stay? This is a positive blog!
Hello again, M.
I see you DID catch me.
Sis M says:
Sorry to barge in, but could one of you do me a favor, please?
Tell the Anon @ 7:01 to go fuck a donkey.
What's the matter, Miss T?
It feels like we are on a downer with people leaving.
What is your current mood m?
What do you mean star?
I thought Sis Midnite's quote was under your last post was yours.
Can I just say one more time that I love you, Mayo?
I just feel the need to say it today.
I know I'm not some crusader like some of the others...but I'm still here for you.
MissTottenham said...
CTV, the message I was trying to get across too was that, everyone discovered this Frank interview and was sooooooo pissed at him.
SS appeared (rolls eyes) with another apology. Everyone went gushy with the "AW, we still love ya Frank, we knew it wasn;t your fault".
That was what I was nagging about.
I do lilke it when ss offers us messages of support and tells us to be nice to each other. I like it when mayo does that.
We could do with less "oh, I didn't speak up over this problem but sorry again" stuff.
Last night his location was 'a town called hypocrisy' so I think he is fully aware that he is a liar and a hypocrite.
He posted his message yesterday because people were directly asking what was going on. He could have just pressed the 'off' switch on his laptop, ignored the heartbreaking messages, and sloped off with his tail between his legs, without as much as a goodbye.
Instead he chose to face the music, tried to explain (as best he could under the circumstances)that there were other motivating forces at work and acknowledge and apologize for his actions.
Now he is gone, I suspect he feels that he betrayed the trust that had been placed in him and irreparably damaged the relationships he was beginning to forge.
He never intended to stay, I think he was surprised and drawn to the traits displayed in abundance on this blog. Warmth, energy, humor, wit, intelligence, empathy, compassion, generosity of spirit, honesty, camaraderie and friendship.
The moment he realized his presence here had actually damaged and perhaps even destroyed something pure, was the moment he knew he must leave.
One thing is certain, the loss is his.
Wow!!! This post is by far my favourite one so far mayo!!
Reading your dream/vision took my breath away in a weird kinda nice way if im honest.
Do you feel you are missing the better half of yourself?
Who was it who took your hand and pulled you away at the end?
Depending on who this was the meaning behind it all could be very different.
Was it someone that you love? Could it mean that this person is pulling you away from the real you? from the you, you strive to be? Is this person making you forget the better half of yourself in someway? Are you clinging desperatly onto the real, good you only to be pulled in every other direction?
I hope with all my heart that the person who pulls you away loves you greatly as you should be loved and that they are only pulling you away because you no longer need the other you.
Even if the other you is at ease and is confident, maybe those surface qualities hide something more sinister behind them and you are being pulled away because there is a greater you to be found? Maybe the other you is yourself from the past? a past that is too dangerous to step back into?
What is the song you are singing to the other you? Is it filled with sadness? Is it a song of goodbye?
Maybe its the other you that grabs you at that crucial moment when you were going to stop singing?
If that is the case i would hope that to mean that just as you were giving up on ever having a part of yourself back you were complete again. I really do hope thats the case. With all my heart
Thankyou so much for sharing this with us.
Im not entirely sure why but this post really struck a chord with me in ways you may never know, or maybe ways you already do know but either way you have inspired me and for that i thankyou greatly. You are beautiful :)
No, sis m just asked for the message to be passed on.
I guess she doesn't feel like being here herself.
Anon, SS isn't gone. He was here earlier today.
I suspect he was tying up loose ends, Magic Pie.
Is this where you all start cutting yourselves?
Anonymous said...
MissTottenham said...
CTV, the message I was trying to get across too was that, everyone discovered this Frank interview and was sooooooo pissed at him.
SS appeared (rolls eyes) with another apology. Everyone went gushy with the "AW, we still love ya Frank, we knew it wasn;t your fault".
That was what I was nagging about.
I do lilke it when ss offers us messages of support and tells us to be nice to each other. I like it when mayo does that.
We could do with less "oh, I didn't speak up over this problem but sorry again" stuff.
Anon, I did say that. My point was that ss talks about defending (enabling) his friend and he always apologises for not doing more.
I just wish he'd stop apologizing. Either do something or not but there's no need to keep apologizing.
I complained about ss appearing then everyone going gushy over Frank because let's face it, we have no proof about who these people are.
Wow, this post in particular is an incredibly interesting read, but I have to sign off for now. It was nice hearing from all of you.
Take Care,
Rose...
Hi! Everybody, how are you guys today?
No one is leaving you can have a two day vacation but you must come back.
To bye bye anon go fuck yourself.
Hey MJ! How are you?
anon at 7:46, you'd like that wouldn't you?
I love life way too much to even think that. And I believe we're all stronger than that. MCR is about hope, not hurting yourself.
See you later Rose.
Anonymous said...
Is this where you all start cutting yourselves?
November 8, 2007 7:46 PM
We don't cut ourselves we cut down those people who come in here and try to upset us. If you have anything positive to add here you should be quiet.
Hello star I'm okay I oversleep today so I missed work. But its okay it appears that I need the rest more than the money. how ABOUT YOU HOW ARE YOU
I'm good, MJ.
I'm off from work today and tomorrow, so I am just relaxing!
Anon @ 7:46
Is this the time for you to go fuck on a fire hydrant? ^_^
Anonymous said...
Is this where you all start cutting yourselves?
November 8, 2007 7:46 PM
I think you're confusing this blog with Buzznet...and yes, some girls on there actually said they were going to start cutting themselves when Gerard starting dating Lindsey. I know this proberly seems funny to you but it's not, it's very serious.
Miss Monster (Usual lurker. I lurker everywhere)
Hello hello martha. How are you?
Anonymous, cutting is definitely not funny. I heard a similar thing when Mikey married Alicia.
Anonymous said...
'Is this where you all start cutting yourselves?'
An irresponsible, petty minded thing to say
anon, you should be ashamed of your comment
m.
"Last night his location was 'a town called hypocrisy' so I think he is fully aware that he is a liar and a hypocrite.
He posted his message yesterday because people were directly asking what was going on. He could have just pressed the 'off' switch on his laptop, ignored the heartbreaking messages, and sloped off with his tail between his legs, without as much as a goodbye.
Instead he chose to face the music, tried to explain (as best he could under the circumstances)that there were other motivating forces at work and acknowledge and apologize for his actions.
Now he is gone, I suspect he feels that he betrayed the trust that had been placed in him and irreparably damaged the relationships he was beginning to forge.
He never intended to stay, I think he was surprised and drawn to the traits displayed in abundance on this blog. Warmth, energy, humor, wit, intelligence, empathy, compassion, generosity of spirit, honesty, camaraderie and friendship.
The moment he realized his presence here had actually damaged and perhaps even destroyed something pure, was the moment he knew he must leave.
One thing is certain, the loss is his.
November 8, 2007 7:39 PM"
Don't you DARE fucking bail on us, SS! Don't you understand, we love you and NEED you.
You are willing to give Mayo chance after chance, but you are not allowing us to give YOU another chance? Do you really think that what you did would make us hate you forever? Do you think that less of us?
If you can forgive and not give up on Mayo, why won't you let us not give up on you? Why can't you stay and be our friend? Just as much as you enjoy talking to us, we enjoy talking to you, and would miss you beyond words.
Give us a chance. PLEASE! You need us as much as we need you. I beg of you, SS.
We love you.
Do you guys wanna hear something awful.
I went to see MCR in Manchester in March. As we were filing out of the venue,I had to do a double take at this girl.
My sis said "oh dear, look at that poor girl, she cuts herself".
There were red slashes all over her arms. But as I got closer, I noticed that it was make-up and they were drawn on.
I was so shocked that she thought that was a good look, it was just an image to her.
Some people ......
Nice to see you are still here m.
Anon @ 7:59, SS was here earlier today.
Hello bc I'm good nice and rested how are you. By the way I meant haven't.
Hi BC,
Well, the Gerard/Lindsey cutting thing was more about that the teenagers on there had believed in the message of MCR and then he started dating her and then there was the whole MCR/MSI message contradiction blow up. Then the rumours Gerard getting drunk and doing drugs again upset alot of them. I wasn't that he had a girlfriend/wife like Mikey but the fact that everything they had been fed by the band had been fabricated when they had made themselves out to be so genuine.
Miss Monster
Hi there Miss Monster. Martha, I'm doing pretty good. Miss T, that is terrible. One thing I despise is the fact that these impressionable kids think that blood, knives, guns, and other negative influences of violence are cool.
I know BC.
To pretend to self harm.
I just don't know what to say.
Today's funny rumors from INO. They really crack me up.
I've just heard another story about G and Lyn-Z getting a divorce... seems to be the new rumour of choice.
They even used the same old thing of him throwing his ring into the crowd.
Good old myspace.
Mikey said "Recently Gerard and Frank have been acting really odd, yesterday Gerard made Frank lunch which is kinda odd as seen as they were arguing and today Frank is seriously ill. He's in hospital and the doctors say that it's some kind of severe food poisoning. I don't know if it had anything to do with Gerard or not."
wat do yall think?
: Gerard had his broken blood vessel (or Nigel as it is called) surgically removed.
I think the broken blood vessel is the small red thing he has under his right eye.
Frank got his peen pierced because he lost a bet to Gerard.
I really like the last one ha!
Hi m and Miss T,
Miss T, I went to the Cardiff show in March and I saw the exact same thing that you did, but this was real cuts. As dispite the fact it was MARCH and freezing cold she still had her sleves rolled up as if she was proud of it or it made her feel as though she belonged there because she was thought he rest of the people there were doing also and she needed to fit in.
Miss Monster
http://www.buzznet.com/tags/gerardway/journals/1270671/mcr-report-schaarbeek-brussels
/
I was checking out Bn to see if there were any videos or photos and this is what I found: mcr report Schaarbeek Brussels. Its in the journal section.
Here are first things that came to my mind when I read this blog:
1. This almost sounds like Mayo is saying there is someone here that he really likes, but there is so much other bullshit going on in here most of the time that even when he tries to pop in, he is ignored - or his thoughts/opinions are missed, or no one believes it is him.
I wonder who it is?
Or,
2. It sounds like Mayo is talking about his/her blog persona and his/her blog commenter i.d. Yes, split personalities, if you will.
I wonder who it is?
Yep, I'm confused...
Miss Monster, I agree.
It truely is sad when people feel they have to do that to fit in.
Hi miss t, Miss monster, m I don't know who else is here.
Miss T, my favorite rumor is the one where Gerard made Frank sick with the lunch he made. That one is hilarious XD
Hi MJ, how are you?
In the song "I don't love you" Gerard pointed at Mikey while singing "when you get back, I'll be off to find another way" and then he said "get it?"
I wonder what this was about.
I don't know what the matter was with Frank, but he just stood there the whole night, headbanging. He didn't jump around or got on his head like he used to, he just didn't leave this area of two metres from his microphone and didn't do anything silly. I thought this was weird.
Anon @ 8:13 I took this blog as a response to the things we were saying about Mayo and Gerard in the other blog. One night we decide to say what we all like about mayo and Gerard. The Gerard ones were sad because they were in the past tense.
Sister Midnite, L. & J, and anyone else who is thinking about leaving,
Don't.
All of you know that this experience has become so much bigger than what it started it out as. For me, I found a blog. Figured what the hell...I might have something to say. Hell, I even posted a few comments. Then my comments started getting comments and I realized I really liked some of the people I was talking to. I hung out. I lurked. I'd join in occasionally, but I didn't dream of creating my own blog. But something strange happened, I loved this place and the people in it. All the characters involved had such great stories to tell. Then it hit me. I had to create my own blog and I have never had such great therapy in my life. And I owe it all to YOU guys.
So please, I am asking you one more time to reconsider. I know that we all still have great stories to tell and fabulous songs to sing together.
You know where to find me if you need me.
Love,
S
p.s. Faith, Hope, Love
Mayo,I really liked this blog.
We're all here for you to help you find that other you.To complete you. I just hope you take the offer of our help.
Are we your new interest or did you find a new interest besides us?
Why I'm here? Like many others, I was drawn here because I care and then made so many friends.
"With you in spirit - always."
Why does that sound like a goodbye?
I really hope you come back SS.Read everyones messages yesterday and see how we feel.
You made everyone breath a sigh of relief when you actually put something up on your blog,don't walk away now.
This almost sounds like Mayo is saying there is someone here that he really likes
Maybe this could explain why those angry anons hasn't returned for a while. I had noticed that the other day. Whenever Mayo posts a new blog, I noticed that I don't see those angry anons here....
With all the shit that has been going down I forgot to tell you guys that Blackheart13 said hello and that she misses you guys.
MJ, where has blackheart 13 gone?
Hey Martha,
How's life treating you?
Miss Monster
Some need to be reminded:
For those with faith, no explanation is necessary. For those without, no explanation is possible. -Thomas Aquinas
Just one last thought....
...Faith, Hope, & Love
Living this way will probably send me to an early grave, but at least I will have lived. And perhaps on my journey, I will have shown someone else how to as well.
Always,
S
In answer to why am I here. It began as curiosity. I was concerned that something was wrong with GW. But on Bn if you voice your concern about it you were called a hater and attacked. So I came here to see what was going on. After a while I decided to join in because it felt safe and I believed that I would fit in here. I did. I stay because I feel save and I fit in.
Sdock10, you always turn up with such beautiful words.
I don't want any of you to ever feel like what you say isn't important. Who knows who might be listening...You might have the exact words that someone needs to hear.
That's a beautiful thing.
That's a special thing.
m @ 7:58
Thank you for that response.
Miss M life is treating me well. I have good friends here and I am happy. How about you?
Miss t Bh13 I to take a break from here. It was taking over her life and not in a good way. Right now she is busy with work and school.
I am trying to get here to come back more often and to stay.
I'm good too MJ. I agree, it's nice to be here among friends.
(((Anonymous said...
I have a new interest.
November 8, 2007 5:54 PM)))
Hello to all
Geez Mayonaise,
Maybe some of us have not come to terms with all your previous, “interests"
However, I do like the idea of something new!
p.s. hope your friends were not too pissed that you were ignoring them, while all this was taking place.
(I know lame humor)
`sc
Thank you for those beautiful sd10. I hope you know how much you mean to us. You are a beautiful person inside and out ^_^
Miss Monster, how are you?
Hello hello SC. How are you?
Hello SC how are you?
Good evening Mayo.
Good evening everyone.
The past few days have been mentally draining, I am sure we are all in similar positions.
The interview, the anons and the strange conversation that I was involved in the other day have made me feel a great deal of discontentment. Maybe that is the idea - divide and conquer IS prevalent, it is just the instigators we are unsure of. With regards to MY conversation, the possibilities are un-nerving.
Mayo,
We are all split into many and complex personalities, why do you think we all get on so well? As for your ' confident ' other side, his smirk says it all. And you know deep inside that you don't like him, why else would you be pleading for him to embrace you again?!
I am glad we woke you up before you decided to stop singing.
Rub your eyes, stretch and get some air to clear your mind.
And we will be near with a cup of something fortifying to keep you going.
http://www.buzznet.com/tags/gerardway/journals/1271091/my-chemical-romance-avoid-being-sued-by/
mcr not being sued
Martha and BC,
Life's great with the exception of the bitch of a virus I picked up while travelling in the States in October, but apart from that, I can't complain. Thanks for asking.
Sdock10, keep up the beautiful sentiments.
Miss Monster
I don't know what the matter was with Frank, but he just stood there the whole night, headbanging. He didn't jump around or got on his head like he used to, he just didn't leave this area of two metres from his microphone and didn't do anything silly. I thought this was weird.
hmmm...doesn't sound like frank...maybe he was upset about something...what could it be...
I am doing well, bleeding chaos and martha
thx for asking and I hope you are all warm and cozy.
looks like we might have a interesting future on mayonaise's blog.
`sc
That's good Miss Monster, but I give you my get well wishes.
SC, good to hear you are okay.
^Thanks BC.
I'm getting over it now though.
Miss Montser
I am off till later
love to everyone
`sc
Frank has been behaving this way in concert for the past few. So, please do not attempt to analyze his behavior and assume it has ANYTHING to do with you or this blog.
Miss m Its good to hear you are getting over the virus you had. Those thing suck shit.
did i touch a nerve?
I know they do Martha. I've had it for a month now.
Miss Monster
Your welcome Miss M
Anonymous, are you saying Frank's behavior is not relevant to us or the blogs?
Frank didn't do anything especially wacky at the concert I saw back in May, either. It's not a big deal. You can't be 'on' all the time, right?
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