Thursday, November 1, 2007

It was the moment when he had the light that it worked.

So you let that go with little debate.
Perhaps it was inserted too late.
Could you please go back in time
just a minute and revisit the rhyme?


The store remains locked.
But the shelves are carefully stocked
with reasons there for all to see.
You are oh so very close to me.




p.s. trust that I try to reflect back to you what you have given to me.

2,117 comments:

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toujours said...

i do hope this blog is a two-way form of communication. sometimes it feels like we're all just your pets running around behind the glass for you.

and hey! thanks for the new poet -- and a local boy, too! i've got him on hold at the library now. still thinking about the poem though. can't decide if it's a good message or an apocolyptic one.

'course, with poetry, there might not be much difference.

Anonymous said...

What the fuck are you blabbing on about now?


Why not just come out with it, dude?

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Anonymous said...

You can not go on living your life within lyrics of songs or the words of poems.

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toujours said...

bc, it was the poem mayo posted last night, at 3:15 am, by joseph mayo wristen.

mayo, looking at your title, looking at the poem -- so you're no longer in the ashes, you feel you're in the fires of darkness?

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toujours said...

no, this is our own dr. seuss here. ^.^

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Original Punk J said...

Okay, Mayo, let's go back to your poem.

"Burn it to the ground..." This feels like the core of the message. The past? If so, what aspect? Internal or external? Personal or professional?

You never answered my other question, by the way.

J.

Anonymous said...

If you want us to play, be somewhat more clear
Come closer and "strip away your hard veneer...."
Your directions, too vague and coy
This looks less like an outlet, more like a toy.

If your "store" is locked then here is your key:
Lord, we know what we are, but not what we may be.
Your "reasons" are the hopeless leading the blind,
but open your own eyes if you're still so inclined.

P.S. You know actually, that's not quite true, Mayo. Your first few posts to us were flippant and rude, and you are either pretending to be Gerard Way which is pretty low because you know that people here are at least concerned for him, or you really are him and you are still treating a lot of people like they are beneath you. So WTF? Can't you acknowledge us, like us or hate us?

Whatever, man, I'm going to bed. Hope you are well and if you are Gerard Way, dude, hang in there or something.

K

toujours said...

lol bc, no it's not actually dr. seuss. i was just tweaking mayo for his simple rhyme scheme, is all! ;D

sorry about the confusion!

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Original Punk J said...

BC,

Stop acting so stupidly. You're not a moron. Get off it.

How did you manage to be the first one to post here, you weren't on the last blog. Makes me wonder.

J.

Anonymous said...

^As well you should. Mayo, a little trite. You can do better.*









*I should talk. :/

Anonymous said...

That comment of mine was to toujours, by the way.

Anonymous said...

Aaaccghhhhkkk! He ain't gonna come out and say shit! He ain't got the balls to! Little sack of shit! I'm fucking tired of this bull.
We all live in a yellow submarine... a yellow submarine... a yellow submarine...






















i killed paul

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anima said...
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Anonymous said...

What rhyme are we to revisit Mayo? You've posted so much cryptic shit, I can't keep up with it.

The "store," you say? Your heart? It remains locked, but all that's in there is placed perfectly where it needs to be, right? To bad we don't get to go shopping in there. Then maybe we'd know what you're trying to say. Isn't it so nice of you to say we're in there? Thanks for that.

Why the hell doesn't it feel like it though?

P.S. maybe you could try a little harder.


Mayo, let me be mad at you tonight. I promise that it won't be that way tomorrow. Oh, but tonight, tonight. (Hmmm...Completely unintentional SP reference there.) Tonight, let me release my ill towards you. It will be different come dawn.

toujours said...

thanks, kapunua, and i agree he can do better (though this is cute, you have to admit). ;)

j. -- actually i probably would have been the first to post if my computer wasn't being a grump tonight. bc probably just got here like i did, checking in by chance.

Anonymous said...

*Too bad we don't get...

That's a pet peeve of mine. I hate it when I accidentally screw that and the your/you're thing up.

Smoke said...

Finally, I can post a fuckin' comment.

I just got a question. Ok, well maybe a few and I know you won't answer me but anyways......

Do you even realize how many people do care? Do you realize that the majority of them don't even know why, but they still do? Can you imagine what it's like for the people who actually do know and love you?

Just a thought. I know what it's like to love someone who is so out of control and to feel helpless because I know that nothing I do or say can change that person. He has to want to change, not me wanting it for him. It doesn't change the fact that it hurts, though. There is someone out there who really does love you. He is hurting. I'm not sure what exactly has went on between you but it is obvious that he is hurting. Just think about it, okay? It's not worth losing that kind of friendship. I can't sit here and judge either one of you. I don't know you. I don't have to know you to see clearly that something has gone terribly wrong and there is still time to fix it.

Don't wait until it is too late and the bridge has already burned.


XOXO,
Not a princess, just another human being with flaws just like everyone else

S&V20

Andrea said...

Mayo, cryptic as ever. When will the cherade end and the truth be revealed? These little games can only hold one's attention for so long...

Anonymous said...

Kapanua races in out of left field and once again flattens Mayo! FTW! LOL

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Anonymous said...

It was just a parry. Awaiting riposte.

But awaiting it asleep, is all. Goodnight, everyone. Goodnight, Mayo. Goodnight, Mom. ^_^

Entropy said...

Mayo,we have given you alot more,our secrets,moments in our life and our thoughts and prayers.
You say you try but you give us these cryptic things on your blog.

Anonymous said...

Mayo:

Did you read my lengthy post of the other blog? It was directed at you. I hope you got the message. This cannot be allowed to go on much longer without some answers. We are looking for them, but obviously in all the wrong places. Is it fun on your end, seeing us run around here trying to make sense of shit? Is it funny to you? Is that why this has gone on for so long? I'll tell you something, buddy, it's not fun being on the receiving it. It sucks. So, if you think this is all fun and games, you have to be, not just a little "touched," but completely "touched." This isn't your regular game of Friday kickball. These are feelings and people.

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Entropy said...

Goodnight Kapunua!

Anonymous said...

Sweet dreams, girl. You win.

elena said...

A kind person would tell us just what it is we've given to you.

Have we given you love? Have we given you pain? Perhaps hope, anger, or something just fucking mundane?

Just what could you reflect on? What are we to you?

Anonymous said...

Are you envisioning yourself as a timeless classic? My, but you dos so carry on and on and on and on...

anima said...

Goodnight everyone. Love to all of you!


P.S. I think we may have mistaken this identity. Or I have arrived at the Crazy Train Station. The latter may be true.

Anonymous said...

Oh and I am not Mayo! Just a lurker who was saying sweet dreams. Dont' every one get excited. ;-D

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Original Punk J said...

S@V20,

Beautiful words, Princess. I agree wholeheartedly.

L. says ditto.

Its all about the love.

J.

Anonymous said...

No, not mayo! I just like the girl. (I am a girl too.....) Mayo might be crushing though. heehee

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Anonymous said...

Elena, we are NOTHING to him!
And yet, he is NOTHING without us!
Problem is, he just doesn't realize that!

Entropy said...

Goodnight Anima.

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Anonymous said...

I'm really beginning to think that Mia. Sucks for us, but not for Mayo. I hope he's happy.

Anonymous said...

BC, Nah.. I'm beginning to be very repelled by this whole thing

Anonymous said...

So you let that go with little debate.
Perhaps it was inserted too late.

(We didn't spend much time wondering what Mayo was really going through. He's thinking he should have spoken up about those feelings a day or so sooner.)

Could you please go back in time
just a minute and revisit the rhyme?
(We missed something. There's more to his last post than what we discussed, then glossed over.)

The store remains locked.
But the shelves are carefully stocked
with reasons there for all to see.
You are oh so very close to me.
(He's not letting everything out. What you see is pretty much what you get, but we know him better than we think we do.)

p.s. trust that I try to reflect back to you what you have given to me.
( He's trying. He reads our comments, good and bad, and he's really trying to reshape himself into the person we see him to be.)

-Amyranth

Anonymous said...

In fact, here is a big FUCK YOU! for Mayo.

See ya in the discount bins, baby!

Smoke said...

Thank you L & J!

I just don't like to see people hurting. Especially when he has such a sweet spirit. I don't want to see that part of him disappear. It's not right.

elena said...

Myalyas - I truly do not believe we are nothing to him. He may want to believe that but it isn't so. He needs our attenion, he needs our compassion. He NEEDS.

and so do we.

Anonymous said...

Amyranth, I think you hit the nail on the head. I agree with everything you said, or typed!

anima said...

Mayo, or whoever you are....
goodnight and happy dreams.

Anonymous said...

What else are we supposed to gather Mayo? Seriously. I can't account for all of these guys, and I know we're all very intelligent people, but sometimes its excruciatingly difficult to "get" what you're saying.

What?

Anonymous said...

No doubt that HE NEEDS! and needs and needs...
Fuck! I got my own fucking needs! And I sure ain't gonna listen to some sawed-off somabitch blabber on and on, without really ever saying anything of any real importance except maybe to him.
This has gone way the fuck beyond ridiculous!

And by the way, Kapunua, I think you'd have an excellent future in the legal profession.

elena said...

And yes Mayo You are the kinda human wreckage that we love.

Original Punk J said...

Princess Smoke,

I'm not sure how many people realize the depth of emotion that exists in his heart. He adores that man. You can see it in his eyes when they're on stage. You can hear it in his voice when he talks about him. This whole summer, it seems, has been both blessing and curse. Huge highs and crushing lows. How many more roller coasters can he ride before he breaks down himself?

J.

Anonymous said...

But, the question remains, what the fuck does he need? I'm not a fucking mind reader Mayo! What do you need from us, from your real friends and family? Do you even need us at all? Obviously you do, for some reason unknown to us lowly ones.

Anonymous said...

May I offer you this...Know that I hold you all in high regard, and that this place is very important to me. I have little time and I give what I can. That is not to excuse my behavior, it is simply fact. I am here, by choice.

Smoke said...

Mayo,

I'm glad that you are here by choice. I just hope that you listen to what we are trying to tell you. We are on the outside looking in. I don't know anything about you. I believe in my heart that your reason for being here and staying here is because you know there is a problem and you know it needs to be corrected.

Now, IDENTIFY and RECTIFY.

Anonymous said...

S&V and J:

Yes. I see it as well. They have, or possibly had such a special bond. I didn't see that tonight. I want them to have it back if it's been lost.

Shame in me said...

I hope you are ok mayo :/

Anonymous said...

Glad to know you don't feel like you have to remain around here. I'm happy to hear you actually want to stick around with us. We're trying our fucking best, you see that don't you?

Anonymous said...

check the time, and goodnight.

Anonymous said...

Mayo,

You claim to be reflecting back what we have given you.

Oh, I see, the shelves are still carefully stocked for that rainy day. Advice has been stored but not yet accessed. Why?

I think you need us now. No, I KNOW that you need us.

It's just too lonely without us. We insult you, we humor you, some praise and offer love, a sometimes love/ hate relationship.

Thank you for making US so special.


You are no blood donor, we are here by choice too.

Entropy said...

Well, that kinda makes me feel alot better knowing that you actually want to be here.

Entropy said...

Goodnight Mayo,hope everything is OK.

elena said...

He needs what everyone needs. Simply sit back a moment and think. What do I need in my life? Those things that you need he needs too. He's just a man. Just a human being like the rest of us. He has dreams and nightmares, hopes and fears. Good days and bad. He just needs.....

Anonymous said...

Blood donor, eh? Gallons of it right?

Me too. Right along with sweat and tears. We're in the same boat Mayo. We all have to be willing to cooperate. You just make it hard sometimes. Accept my apologies, will you? I didn't mean to be so hard on you. You just frustrate me to no end sometimes.

Sleep well. And thank you for explaining what's in your heart. I heard truth tonight, and I'm so thankful for that.

Anonymous said...

Goodnight, Mayo.

Anonymous said...

Mayo rectify something for us

Is your union, YOUR CHOICE?

Anonymous said...

Damn, dude! Just act like a real person for once! If "we" are so fucking special to you, why treat us like this?

Smoke said...

Elena, exactly.

Mayo, Katerina is right. We are all here by choice as well.
Hope you think about what we said.

SS,

Don't ever let that spirit die. Your honesty and loyalty inspire me. I would love to have a friend like you and would love even more to be able to BE that kind of friend to someone else.

Night everyone. It's like WAY past my bedtime down here in the boonies.

S&V20

Anonymous said...

Night, sweet S&V20! Sleep tight!

ergoproxy said...

Hi all

Mayo , if you are Gerard, and hold us in high esteem just one thing, one little thing, just as a start..

STOP...WRITING...ON...YOURSELF !!!

please.

it is old, it is boring, it is juvenile.

Then sort the rest of your life out!

elena said...

I don't feel mistreated. Since coming here I feel connected.

Entropy said...

Goodnight S&V20!
that was greatly said by the way.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you, elena.

Martha Smith-Jones said...

He probably treats us like this because in a way it is therapy for him.

Anonymous said...

He needs what everyone needs. Simply sit back a moment and think. What do I need in my life? Those things that you need he needs too. He's just a man. Just a human being like the rest of us. He has dreams and nightmares, hopes and fears. Good days and bad. He just needs.....


I know. I know he needs, we need, everybody needs. I hope he finds what he's looking for. I can't give anything to him except my words. Neither can you. Neither can any of us. They're just words. But, I hope he finds what he's looking for in these words. And I hope he finds what he's looking for in his real life, too. I hope he finds it all.


*psst...Mayo! Maybe you should take your own advice and count every fourth word ;)*

Original Punk J said...

Hello Anonymous.

Welcome to Mayo's space. Or maybe it's your own space.

We all would like an explanation of certain bizarre behaviors that have evidenced of late. L. and I watched video of Gerard and the band from the EMAs. To quote L, "FUCKING HELL, GERARD!"

I, too, would like to make that comment.

Where's the man who said he can't handle alcohol and drugs, and would never do them again? Did G's new personality kill him? I wouldn't doubt it.

This coy Mayo person that comes out occasionally doesn't really help to answer questions. Often he raises more. I know Mayo enjoys a verbal challenge, but sometimes we just want plain talk.

I accept that you hold us in high regard. Otherwise, you wouldn't come back to us. Hopefully we make a good substitution for people you can actually see. But, do you still see all those people around you? Like the cute little guy who stands on the right hand of the stage? He's been trying to help all this time. He looks so sad, though. Like his heart's been broken.

So. There ya go.

J.

Anonymous said...

May I offer you this...Know that I hold you all in high regard, and that this place is very important to me. I have little time and I give what I can. That is not to excuse my behavior, it is simply fact. I am here, by choice.

(He likes us. ;) )

-Amyranth is listening to Aqua

ergoproxy said...

which are the pictures people speak of, and how far into EMA's was teenagers ( I taped it)

Anonymous said...

But, do you still see all those people around you? Like the cute little guy who stands on the right hand of the stage? He's been trying to help all this time. He looks so sad, though. Like his heart's been broken.


Oh, J. The picture you paint.

There's a somber mood in my heart tonight. It's lingered and followed behind me, keeping march with my every step. Kinda like the way Stage Right follows Center Stage. It makes me sad to know you're probably right J. I just don't have many words to say. You've said it all.

Anonymous said...

catholic, blood donor, martyer.

elena said...

Mayo - What we have in common is our need to be here. I'm pleased we both now admit that fact. Goodnight
I wonder if we have someting else in common.
Everynight I say to myself "Tomorrow will be better."
Sometimes it is, often not. But the hope, well that's what keeps me going.

soulconnector said...

(((p.s. trust that I try to reflect back to you what you have given to me.)))

mayonaise,
you either do or you don't and if you dont.well...that is up to you.

regards to all
`sc

toujours said...

i want to be mad, like the others. i want to turn my frustration against you, to turn the knowledge that i'm nothing inside out and make it your fault -- but then you post, and everything i felt is flung away at the sight of your new words.

"blood donor", eh? you know, don't you, that all you have to do is ask, and we'll fill you back up beyond measure.

and maybe, you don't even have to ask.

Anonymous said...

For some reason I don't understand, I don't get mad or frustrated when he posts. I just feel sad, and wish I could help.

Anonymous said...

But the hope, well that's what keeps me going.


I know that's all I have left. That, and a smidgen of faith. And I've got you guys, probably the most important part of the equation, to listen to me and vice versa. We're a family now, and by God, that's what families do.

Anonymous said...

Very true, MIB.

ergoproxy said...

sorry he can't have my blood, unless he gets it without a needle.


I am skipping through EMA's and I ave to say I love Ray when he smiles, and Dave Grohll rocks!!

Anonymous said...

From someone the band and Gerard has gained inspiration from:


"There is more to life than trying to find your way through self-destruction or throwing yourself into the fire all the time."

I hope you're reading this Gerard. I'm calling you out on your shit by using someone else's words.

Anonymous said...

To what, Elena? What do you feel connected to here? If this blog were to dissappear tomorrow, how would you feel? Would it really, honestly, take away something vital in your life?
No. Or at least, I hope not!

I'm really beginning to believe that he WANTS to go down as a long-suffering, sad and tragic figure of his time. Well, ain't that fucked up? You people keep talking about Cobain, like he's the only poor pitiful talented soul that life ended for way too soon. Guess what? The majority of people do not even know who the fuck he was! Nor do they care!

But, hey, I'm beginning to think that maybe Gerard has a good idea. He's at the top of his game (the highest he's ever gonna get anyway) so maybe it is time for him to check out - while the checkings good. Sure would beat the hell out of playing VWFs again in about 2 years!


Yes, I'm fucking pissed and I'm fucking tired of kissing this mother-fucker's ass! So...


Fuck you!

Anonymous said...

It's okay Mia. Seriously, let it out. I've done my fair share today.


When I think about Kurt Cobain, I become sad. When I think about John Lennon, I become sad. When I think about Gerard Way, I become sad. It shouldn't be this way.

I find it funny (not funny "haha," but funny as in ironic) that when Gerard was asked by an interviewer on how he felt being this generation's Kurt Cobain, he responded with something along the lines of, "I don't consider myself the Kurt Cobain of this generation, but I definitely know where he was coming from. I definitely sympathize with what he felt."


Maybe I should post here what I posted at BC's.

elena said...

Myalyas such anger. I'm guessing you are much younger then me. With age comes more acceptance of human nature. If this blog ended tomorrow life would go on. Would I miss this place? Of course. I would miss all these wonderful people who are here by choice. I would miss Mayo who is also here by choice. People come together to feel a part of something that is bigger then just their own little world. People come together so that they don't feel the emptyness of being alone. We are need.

Anonymous said...

Gerard should pull his head out of his own ass instead of trying to be some bloody suffering matyr and make a real difference in the world.

Anonymous said...

Star said...

For some reason I don't understand, I don't get mad or frustrated when he posts. I just feel sad, and wish I could help.


Agreed. I don't know what the frustration is over. Maybe it's because I haven't been here since the very first post, so there must be something I've missed.

Maybe I'm a little more blind than the doctor tells me I am.

-Amyranth is looking up old music from her childhood.

Anonymous said...

People come together to feel a part of something that is bigger then just their own little world. People come together so that they don't feel the emptyness of being alone.


I'll be the first to admit it.

ergoproxy said...

HI amyranth I don't get that het up either, I just want him to perform properly and then get on with his life.
I actually thought the EMA performance was good, at least he was dressed nicely, and I didn't see hissy fit, but act at the end of the song, to me it fitted the song, goodness some bands smash guitars and amps, dropping a mic isn't that much of an issue

Anonymous said...

Gerard, if you really are that fucking egotistical to think that you are anywhere near the league of some of the late greats (and don't even hallucinate that I'm talking about Kurt Cobain) then I insist that you do it now! I double-dog, no, TRIPLE-dog dare you!
You ain't got a hair on your ass if you don't! No one will remember you if you don't! Do it! Let us see how truly sad and twisted and pitiful you really are and how stupid we were to not have seen it and helped you.

Original Punk J said...

I think it's time for this punk to head for bed.

Goodnight to all my fellow posters. See you tomorrow. Mustard, thanks for the good words.

Shitsubou, I left you a message on the previous blog, in case you didn't catch it. Sneak on back there, honey, I want you to read it.

Mayo--nice talking with you. Will you for God's sake listen to us? We love you, motherfucker, and want you to be well. L. is ready to beat your ass for your stunt earlier. Please don't piss her off anymore, she scares me. (this is sort of a joke, but sort of not)

Night all.

Its got to be all about the love.

J.

Anonymous said...

Oj, Elena, you're funnier than hell! No, I'm the fucking oldest person here! Meaning, I don't have much patience for this bullshit!

Anonymous said...

Night, OPs. Thank you for being so positive all the time!

Anonymous said...

Just a question Mia, and this isn't meant to be derogatory or anything of the like, but do you not think Kurt Cobain would be considered a "late great," as you said?

Just curious.

Entropy said...

Goodnight J!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Gerard should pull his head out of his own ass instead of trying to be some bloody suffering matyr and make a real difference in the world.

November 2, 2007 5:17 AM



Thank you! I hear music all the time that has such a better message but it is MCR that is getting the "awe" because of pretty boy and I think it absolutely sucks!

Anonymous said...

Mustard, no, I do not.

elena said...

Myalyas
Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.....

Do you fear for Mayo? Do you fear you care? Do you fear he doesn't?

Perhaps you have no fear. In that case I envy you. I have many fears.

Tonight you have much anger.

Anonymous said...

ergoproxy said...

HI amyranth I don't get that het up either, I just want him to perform properly and then get on with his life.
I actually thought the EMA performance was good, at least he was dressed nicely, and I didn't see hissy fit, but act at the end of the song, to me it fitted the song, goodness some bands smash guitars and amps, dropping a mic isn't that much of an issue

November 2, 2007 5:21 AM

Anyone got a vid of that?

-Amyranth is on Youtube anyway.

Anonymous said...

Mia:
Well...I guess that's good enough for me.


Thank you! I hear music all the time that has such a better message but it is MCR that is getting the "awe" because of pretty boy and I think it absolutely sucks!


Yes, but I don't believe it has always been this way. There was a message. It just got buried. I, for one, have never been in "awe" of MCR because of Gerard's looks, if that's what you mean by that. It's never been about superficiality for me. It's been about the lyrics and the kickass composition of their musical talent. Never once has it been about any of the guys looks.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I have much anger and much fear. Probably much more than our dear Mayo, because I am just an ordinary person, not a rock star, selling albums, winning awards, and packing stadiums.
But what you really want to say is that I have much hate, is it not?
What I hate is this bullshit! It is a game and I don't think anyone is ever going to pass Go or get out of jail! I think Mayo owns all the blue property and has about 4 hotels on each of them!

Anonymous said...

Myalyas

Why do you care so much?

If it pisses you off this immensely then why read it? If you're the older person here, then why haven't you realized, like some of us, that Mayo=/= Gerard, and treating him as thus is probably not making him any more likely to tell us who he really is?

While we're at it, why is it just Mayo's identity? Be logical. You don't know any of us from a hole in the ground, and I don't see you tossing your shirt because we haven't revealed our personages as well.

Just sayin'

-Amyranth

Anonymous said...

Yes, the smashing of equipment - it has all been done before. Nothing new.
Wearing make-up, cursing on stage, masturbating, throwing up, ripping a chicken's head off... it's all been done before...
How you gonna top that, Mayo?
Ooh... I've got an idea...

Anonymous said...

You ain't got a hair on your ass if you don't! No one will remember you if you don't! Do it! Let us see how truly sad and twisted and pitiful you really are and how stupid we were to not have seen it and helped you.

That is fucked up. You want this man to kill himself just to prove your point?
I don't think you should go about daring him to do such a thing,you have no idea where his head is at.

Anonymous said...

While we're at it, why is it just Mayo's identity? Be logical. You don't know any of us from a hole in the ground, and I don't see you tossing your shirt because we haven't revealed our personages as well.

Just sayin'

-Amyranth



Hmm.... Quite honestly... probably because I don't know any of you from a hole in the ground... and I've never heard you sing Disenchanted. Tell me, can you carry a tune?

elena said...

Myalyas said...
Yes, I have much anger and much fear. Probably much more than our dear Mayo, because I am just an ordinary person, not a rock star, selling albums, winning awards, and packing stadiums.

I don't believe that being a rock star, selling albums, winning awards of packing stadiums suddenly makes you immune to fear, regret, anger, hatred or any other emotion for that matter. Do you really believe the beautiful, the rich people of the world have it so much better than the rest of us? Look at the celebrities of today. They are as fucked up as the rest of us. Gerard Way is no better, no worse than anyone. He laughs and cries. He fucks things up and sometimes he gets it right. Just like the rest of us. At the end of the day, like ever other person on this earth he just needs to feel a part of something.

Anonymous said...

Hmm.... Quite honestly... probably because I don't know any of you from a hole in the ground... and I've never heard you sing Disenchanted. Tell me, can you carry a tune?


That depends. Can you hand me a basket?

-Amyranth

Anonymous said...

I honestly don't think I want to be here right now. Although I respect all of your comments, I don't like where this is headed. I'm bowing out now. Safely argue your points ladies.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, dear, you clearly don't get it! Both Mayo and I are fucked up in our thinking! Neither one of us really feel that way, not when it gets right down to it. Do we, Mayo?

Anonymous said...

Okay, forget it.


Myalyas:
How certain are you that Mayo doesn't feel this way? And how can you be so sure? You either think about suicide or you don't. I don't see where there's a middle ground.

Anonymous said...

It is all a game, you twits! And I'm just calling him on it!

Anonymous said...

Oh, darling... There is a middle ground. Trust me...

Anonymous said...

Wow. Myalyas, maybe you should take a step back from this before you completely regret something you might say. Maybe a chance to cool down would be best?

I appreciate your fervor, but there's no indication either way that this is or isn't a game. It could be. Then again, it may not be and there's someone on the other end of our screens seeking something. We don't know.

soulconnector said...

Sometimes,I see people as a kind of good or bad smoke that drifts in,around and possibly out of our lives.

For no apparant reason,their essense remains on your skin.Then oneday,it no longer lingers,with no answers and it seems gone forever...

but it is never truly forgotten

In the future, something will trigger your senses,their essence floods your memory...

and you take in all the pleasure and or the pain once again and finally understand the reason they were here.
`sc

Anonymous said...

Just how is there a middle ground between saying, "I want to die. This isn't what I signed up for" and "I don't want to die. There's more out there for me than this"?

Is the middle ground the battle waged between the devil on your right and the angel on your left?

"Do it."

"Don't do it."

Is that what the middle ground is?

Anonymous said...

I don't know... You'd have to ask a Catholic

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
elena said...

Then again, it may not be and there's someone on the other end of our screens seeking something. We don't know.

Well said Mustard. But really you have to know. Whoever Mayo is he is seeking, no searching for something. We all are.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Well, that poses a problem because I don't know a Catholic. I know not one fucking thing about Catholicism.

Here's a guess.

Purgatory?

Anonymous said...

Well, in that case. I'd say we're all living in our own purgatory. Would you agree?

How are we to say that Mayo, or anyone for that matter, isn't too far to one side of this middle ground? How are we to know?

Anonymous said...

Purgatory? What is purgatory?

Anonymous said...

Myalyas said...

I don't know... You'd have to ask a Catholic

Okay, now you're just babbling.

Really, Purgatory isn't a place where you go to contemplate bad deeds, it's where you go when you haven't been baptized, or you go against God's Will, usually through something they outlaw in the bible. That can be suicide, abortion, or divorce among other things.

So... I see zero connection between this blog and Purgatory really.

Although if I could see any connection between this blog and any other literary works, I'd have to link it with The King In Yellow.

-Amyranth has H.P.L on the brain.

Anonymous said...

correct

Anonymous said...

Well, maybe it isn't purgatory, but a constant state of unrest. A constant battle with yourself. A fight between good and evil. How are we to know the difference?

Anonymous said...

Correct

Anonymous said...

"Correct" in regards to which question? Elaboration is necessary, especially when dealing with such a heavy subject.

Anonymous said...

Damned if you do, damned if you don't

elena said...

Mustard you do know a Catholic. I've been one for 45 years.

Anonymous said...

I can tell you're speaking from a personal viewpoint. It'll always be like that though. It's never going to change. For anybody. No one will ever be satisfied with what they have. No one will ever be satisfied with the amount they give. Such is life.


The middle ground is complacency. A stagnation of sorts. I know. I've been there. Quite possibly may still be there. The place where you aren't quite sure if you're good enough to stick it out. The place where you aren't quite sure if there's enough good in you, but you're pretty sure it still resides there. A back and forth. A see-saw. I know.

Are you okay?

Anonymous said...

Oh, shit! I nearly forgot my political correctness! We must not speak of religion! Lest we be accused of trying to push our views and beliefs on anyone else!

Anonymous said...

Well then Elena. You're my first Catholic encounter. Very nice to meet you!

Anonymous said...

Oy Vey.

As usual, this isn't going to be resolved in one night so I'll depart, but leave a little reading for all of you.

Camilla: You, sir, should unmask.
Stranger: Indeed?
Cassilda: Indeed it's time. We all have laid aside disguise but you.
Stranger: I wear no mask.
Camilla: (Terrified, aside to Cassilda.) No mask? No mask!

THE KING IN YELLOW: Act I Scene 2


Food for thought.

-Amyranth

Anonymous said...

Yes, a nice little fictional piece from the late 1800's

Anonymous said...

MAYO

How dare you lie to us!!!

You two-faced hypocrite.

Vultures, is that what you think we are?

You are so disgusting. People here are so frustrated by your stupid childish behavior, You bad mouth them on another site, and yet you post that you hold the people here in high regard.

My ass!!!

This is such typical crap by you, just like the way you treated your girlfriend(not Eliza) before doing your disappearing act, and marrying that whore.

Oh Mr paranoia plus, you are so convinced everyone is trying to bite a chunk out of you, or trying to possess you in some way.

Unbelievable delusional FUCK!. You deserve no respect whatsoever.

Zorro go shove it up your ass!!!

Anonymous said...

Well...hello there.

Anonymous said...

Now, that, my friends, is one who has issues...

Anonymous said...

Oh, dear...
I have found myself out of wine...
I'm so sorry, but I must log out for now...
I hope you'll understand is I miss the "kickball" game tomorrow...
again.

elena said...

Anon - Wow take it down a notch.
and please I so hate it when people pop in and talk about those of us here like we're invisible....

ANON
You are so disgusting. People here are so frustrated by your stupid childish behavior, You bad mouth them on another site, and yet you post that you hold the people here in high regard.

Sitting right here...thank you very much.

Anonymous said...

anon at 6:30 AM

Yikes. Just.. Yikes.

-Amyranth

elena said...

Mustard....
Here is just a thought about Catholic on his neck..
Nov 1 is All Saints Day....in the Catholic church.

Could mean something, could meean nothing.

Entropy said...

People here are so frustrated by your stupid childish behavior, You bad mouth them on another site, and yet you post that you hold the people here in high regard.

What? Another site?

Anonymous said...

Oh.....we're discussing purgatory tonight, are we?

Okay, here's an explanation of purgatory:

A state or place of purification after death; according to the Roman Catholic creed, a place, or a state believed to exist after death, in which the souls of persons are purified by expiating such offenses committed in this life as do not merit eternal damnation, or in which they fully satisfy the justice of God for sins that have been forgiven. After this purgation from the impurities of sin, the souls are believed to be received into heaven.

I was raised Catholic :)

Anonymous said...

Entropy said...

People here are so frustrated by your stupid childish behavior, You bad mouth them on another site, and yet you post that you hold the people here in high regard.

What? Another site?



Internesting.

-Amyranth

Anonymous said...

No, Entropy! I will a tie a rope around your waist! Do not go anywhere!

Anonymous said...

anon616 - Okay, so I haven't been to church in awhile and it shows.

But yeah, you're right. However, stating that is just re-stating what's been said. Coming here makes the poster feel better.

-Amyranth isn't that blind after all.

Anonymous said...

Give me a Biblical reference to purgatory.

Entropy said...

Oh don't worry I'm not going anywhere.
I was just asking what that anon was talking about.

Anonymous said...

Good! One bullshit cryptic blog is enough, don't you think?!

Anonymous said...

Myalyas, if you're reading this, I'm concerned about you. Tell me not to be, but what the fuck do I have to lose? I am. My outburst this morning and evening was prompted by something completely different from what Mayo has posted. I have the same feeling this is what has happened with you. I could be wrong. But, I hope you're okay.


Elena:

I have no idea what goes through his head when he wants to pretend to be a coloring book. I thought this Sharpie shit was for shows. Now I guess it's for award shows as well. Must want his words to be seen by millions of viewers. I don't know what he meant by "Catholic." Lyn-Z probably had "Church" or "Pope" written on her tonight, and he just felt the need to support that. Yeah. Probably.

Anon:
I don't care who you are, or where you came from. I've said this so many times before and others have as well. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. We don't need your condescending posts around here. You'll be respected when you post something respectable. Calling someone a "whore" falls short of that mark. Try again.

Anonymous said...

OK, Gotta go! I know you all just hate that!
I may or may not be back in the next day or so.
Think happy thoughts ;)

Entropy said...

Myalyas,goodnight.
I hope everything is okay with you and you return soon to let us now that.

Anonymous said...

Mustard,


Thanks for your thoughts.

Anonymous said...

You too, Entropy!





You too, Mayo!








Goodnight, John Boy!

Anonymous said...

You're welcome. But, are you okay?

elena said...

Mustard I luv ya. Keep the faith. We know why we're here. Even if by some chance Mayo did think this all was a game here the joke would be on him. Cause he needs to be here just as much as we do.

ergoproxy said...

amyranth, I don't know about youtube I watched it on MTV (aust)

Anonymous said...

Yep, Elena. I believe you're right. We wouldn't keep coming back if this place wasn't providing something. Same goes for Mayo. He wouldn't keep posting and reading if wasn't doing anything for him.

And as you know, I'm trying my damnedest to keep the faith, but it's proving more difficult each passing day. I'm going to hang in there. Tomorrow is a new day. Then there's a new one after that. And, then a new one. And you get the point. It's all that can be done right now.

If I disappear, I've fallen asleep. Don't worry.

Anonymous said...

Myalyas said...
Give me a Biblical reference to purgatory.

I don't think there are any Biblical references to purgatory. It's a creation of The Roman Catholic Church. The term purgatory is based on the idea of a purification by fire after death. Actually, it's a very old pagan belief......

Entropy said...

Goodnight everyone,talk to you all tomorrow.

I wish you a goodnight too Mayo.

ergoproxy said...

There is no real biblical reference to purgatory however it comes from the interepretation that hell remains closed until the second coming when God shall defeat Satan,as he was banished to earth, not hell after the dispute in heaven.
Purgatory I believe began as that place for souls dying in a state of unforgiveness to atone for sins prior to the ascension to heaven after the final battle.
It is though a Catholic concept.

ergoproxy said...

you do know though that catholic can mean "broad" as in "I have very catholic tastes"

here is definition from dictionary .com
1. broad or wide-ranging in tastes, interests, or the like; having sympathies with all; broad-minded; liberal.
2. universal in extent; involving all; of interest to all.
3. pertaining to the whole Christian body or church.


maybe it's nothing to do with the church, just suggesting

Anonymous said...

Clarification:
"purification by fire after death" is the old pagan belief.

Boy, we Catholics, practicing or not, stole doctrine from everywhere ;)

Anonymous said...

Oh darn! I ran everyone off with my "religious speak". Well, we WERE asked about purgatory. And I was in such a chatty mood this morning. :(


Sweet dreams for those going night-night! For those just waking, have a great Friday!

ergoproxy said...

haha anon 616

pretty much every christian holiday had a pagan equivalent !

Easter,christmas included. Steal the celebration and make it your own.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, if you have proof that Mayo was badmouthing us, I would like to see it for myself. Nothing Mayo writes surprises me anymore.

Anonymous said...

BC You have such little faith

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ergoproxy said...

BC what is he lying about?

If I could sort the lies from the truth the extent of my faith would be easier to determine.

Anonymous said...

Mayo,

You have requested us to revisit the poem you belatedly posted on your previous blog. Why does this hold so much significance to you?

I thought this one more appropriate:

Joseph Mayo Wristen - An Epithet for the Dead Poet

The voice of a dead poet
calling out from his grave
asking me to follow his visions.
Once a spirit he is now just
one of the many souls
who have remained here to
be with the living.
His passionate thoughts.
His causes.
The moment in his life when he failed
to realize who he was.
His fears preventing him from
finding his place in the afterworld.
the dead poet has awakened from his death.

The beating that comes from his heart.
The pounding of the drums.
The tribes of commerce
who call out to his dream.
They recite his name in prayer,
looking to find the means to combat
the oppressors of their different societies.

I dance to his testimonial
in the heat of the night.
I dance to his living death.

No,
he was not a Saint
and some say that he was
not even a considerate man.
But he was a concerned individual
one who was aware
of what was happening
around him,and what the world
would be like if humanity did
not take care of the land.

The beating of his heart.

I can hear his cries of
suffering.His words of pain.
He is asking us to fight
to take arms against
the establishment of social
injustices.To take down the walls
of religious prejudices.
The words of his revolution
playing on vinyl spy recording.

His verses ingrained in the minds
of those who are out there
looking for Nature’s truth.
He is the messenger
of a concerned sect.
His death, the signaling of
the second coming.

The figure of the dead poet,
a voice of enlightenment,
a symbol of man
standing against ideal empires.

The full moon casting a spell
over our consciousness.
The poet’s ghost dancing under the stars
his soul looking to be freed.
The blood bleeding from his heart
his visions staining my mind.

The beating of the drums.
His poetry tapping the injustices
of a free enterprise.
He is crying out to us.
Shouting out to us from his grave.
Burn it down. Burn it.


Burn it to the ground.

The dead poet has returned and
there is no way I can escape his voice.
He has taken me to his grave
shown me the emptiness of the next world.
Shared with me the plans of the deceiver.
He has witnessed the repeating death
traitors of God receive when found guilty.
He has returned to show us the way
of our salvation.
He is here right now. He is inside my mind.

Realities madness taking me beyond reasoning.


The other one smacks of Joan of Arc fantasies... don't you think?

Now this one describes your situation...so perfectly.

Oh, and another thing,..no more riddles, their so passe.

Anonymous said...

Mayo,
I have a few choice words for you this morning, but I am going to take some time to think them over and write when I am not as angry/upset as I am at this moment in time.

Everyone else including MissT,
I promised yesterday that if I found the EMA interview I would post a link, so here it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2XvF72417Y

Anonymous said...

I've got a secret.

No, not about that, sorry.

If you want to get under Mayo's label,

If you want him to give up the goods,

Then everyone has to stop posting.

Any regulars here, must go somewhere else to talk and discuss. Coordinate amongst yourselves and occupy another space.

It's the only way you're going to have a chance to get him to say anything.

Old fashioned Silent Treatment.

farawaysoclose said...

hi everyone.
hello mayo.

right when i first read this new one and read about the shelves being carefully stocked, the first thing that came to mind was the blog about putting things on a lower shelf.
i checked back and that one was posted on 10th oct:


In the future where directions more difficult than it seemed.

'The ceramic virgins for sale on every corner only served to remind me of lessons long forgotten.
I am glad to have put those exhortations on a low shelf. I need them.'

i mean its a reference to catholicism and a reference to shelves.

The store remains locked.
But the shelves are carefully stocked
with reasons there for all to see.
You are oh so very close to me.

do you think he has realised he needs his faith back to sort himself out but he can't get to it, there are barriers stopping him.
but wasn't it gerards catholic upbringing that fucked him up in the beginning...his obsession with death and everything. and after his grandmother died he said he had a lot of anger with the catholic church.

??? does anyone make anything of it. i'm not very good at mayo but some of you are very good. would be intersted in your thoughts on it anyway.

just need to state this is based on the fact that mayo is gerard or wants to be percieved that way. i haven't gone totally mad its just thay mayo wants us to think that so i'm trying to interpret it with that in mind.

happy friday guys. i'm off to the supermarket with my son.
whoopeefuckindoo!

freddycharles said...

The devil was an angel once beautiful like you

I don't care how far you fall I'll catch you when you do

JocelynHolly said...

What the hell?
Silent treatment?
That might work, but he'd probably feel neglected. It seems a little childish as well. Whatever, that's probably what he needs.

Mayo; I know you care about us. Thanks for giving us some of your time though. But seriously buddy, if you want us to figure you out, then give us a little help here!

Hugs and kisses Mayo!

Hugs for all!

Love;
-007

Magic Pie said...

I'm not even going to pretend to know what this means. I'm so tired of the riddles.

I care for you very much and I want you to be happy. That's all I want.

But I don't know how much longer I can take the hidden meanings and subtle admissions.

Loli Lovette said...

Good morning everyone! Good morning M-yo. Light and darkness, good and evil, man's essential illness, the eternal battle. It's almost inevitable that we all face it at least once.

Magic Pie said...

Once again, my head hurts from reading through some people's comments.

Why such anger and hatred?

Anonymous said...

What I would like to know is if the "store" represents the heart or the head.

P.S. Mayo, remember you get what you give in the end......

Magic Pie said...

another Catholic waves her hand here!

Magic Pie said...

to This isn't cryptic, hurrah!,

we tried to do that...it didn't work.

Anonymous said...

Mayo:

Sorry all here did not quite understand what you wrote about in you last blog entry. I still don't get it. What did we miss?

You are like a teacher who gives his student little hints about the lesson and us students are suppose to contimplate and discuss until we find the answers to these cryptic blogs.

Well guess what I graduated from school long ago. Life is too short to discuss poetry especially if the subject matter never changes - been there done that. Come on are you blogging for answers or you do you love to see us travel through the rat maze to find the cheese at the end of puzzle. Are we your psch experiment of the year?

I am so tired!. Whoever you are in real life I really cared in the beginning, but NOW you are just pissing me off!! I feel like I've been in the rinse cycle for too many times here.
p.

Anonymous said...

Shit - oops - I meant "psych"

Anonymous said...

"This isn't cryptic, hurrah! said...
I've got a secret.

No, not about that, sorry.

If you want to get under Mayo's label,

If you want him to give up the goods,

Then everyone has to stop posting.

Any regulars here, must go somewhere else to talk and discuss. Coordinate amongst yourselves and occupy another space.

It's the only way you're going to have a chance to get him to say anything.

Old fashioned Silent Treatment.

November 2, 2007 11:00 AM"


Bingo!!!! This guy has everyone posting, reposting, and lurking like no ones buisness. If we want answers, take to Friday nite footballs games elsewhere

Lets Boycot for non-cryptic answers.

Come on Mayo, I am begging one last time (on knees) post something real, dark and deep with out being crypitc - real words and real sentences. Let go - it won't hurt, I promise.

sdock10 said...

Mayo,

How's life going for you today? I'm not so much numb anymore. The feeling is slowly returning, and I'm agitated and uncomfortable as hell. I do apologize for missing your visits for 2 nights in a row, but that's a price I'm willing to pay to keep my sanity and my life in my small little town. DSL & high speed access aren't available everywhere my friend....no matter what those fucking commercials say.

Now, back to the issues at hand, let me discuss your post. The rhyme...I gave you my interpretation yesterday, but that was a reflection from my point of view with only myself in mind. One line still sticks out "The ashes of light being better than the fires of darkness." Ashes of light...truth, hope, life, and the possibility of a tomorrow. Fires of darkness...despair, death, lies, and the demons of our past. Both are necessary. But you have to decide...Do you want to dwell on the past? Let it rule, control, and destroy you? Or....Do you look to the future with a glimmer of hope in your eye? Let all that shit go and seek the truth no matter how tiny the fragments are? Use the little bit of light you have to find it. I'll be glad to help you search.

Keeping the store locked might seem like a smart and a safe thing to do. Afterall, you can't have looters and theives running around grabbing and stealing from your stock....But, it might be a good idea to get a few spare keys made. Just in case those closest to you, the ones you hold near and dear need to get in.

....Here, I'm giving you a key to mine. If your stock runs low, feel free to let yourself in and take what you need from my shelves.

Blood donor...Can I lay on the gurney next to you? I usually have plenty to give. My IV is still attached, but this time I need to be on the receiving end. Thanks, for the life support. I'll be glad to return the favor anytime.

Love to YOU Always,
S

p.s. trust that I try to always give you what you need.

elena said...

Why would you ignore someone who is speaking? My mama taught me that kind of behavior is rude. Mayo speaks I listen. Perhaps I don't quite understand what he is saying. Most of the time people don't understand what I'm saying. But I do understand how much it hurts when no one listens.

Talk away Mayo

I'm listening.

And deep down I know you are listening too. And fuck it that little thought makes me happy.

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