When I was young I was picked on quite a bit. The usual set of circumstances, I was an easy target (smart, quiet, odd, insecure) and once the kids found my buttons they didn’t relent. For a long time I tried to ignore them. I spent a lot of time reading because I thought that with a book in front of my face I would blend into the background. And, for a while I did. From behind those first books I developed my love of the written word. Beginning with the marvels I found in the library and then later the stories I found in my own head. My need to escape elementary school torment helped foster my imagination, I suppose. I need to thank those kids for that.
So anyway, a few times the kids pretended that they wanted to be my friend. A kid would ask if I wanted to hang out on the playground either at recess or after school. The first couple of times I bought it. It was a pathetic display of desperation that, looking back now, makes me laugh. You can see that kid, right?...very awkward, over-filled book bag, disheveled clothes, greasy hair, hopeful smile. I would wait for my friend to show up and of course they wouldn’t and I would eventually trudge home. Sometimes they would gather somewhere along my route and give me a hard time shouting “Who were you waiting for back there?” and “Did you really think we’d be friends with you.” It was worse when they would wait until the next day bringing my humiliation to school to share with the rest of the class.
Why am I telling you this? Well…insight I suppose and also to offer some context that you may draw from for those times when I seem a bit vague (yes, really). I have had to overcome and still battle with some pretty substantial trust issues. Always present in the back of my mind is the voice telling me to watch out for anyone who gets too close because they probably have an ulterior motive that will leave me in a rut. It has taken me a long time and years of therapy to be able to ignore that voice and share even my more simple weaknesses with friends (without the guise of fiction). And, so I share this piece of myself, my past with you.
p.s. I am not sure what you will glean from my palate but my gut holds plenty.
(Not at present: soon and I'll let you know when.)
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4,973 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 2401 – 2600 of 4973 Newer› Newest»Anonymous said...
" Selection" is about sex. Marriage happens when you can't stop.
i know you're not talking about sex
with the "can't stop".
sex usually decreases significantly after the first six months of marriage.
even more after the first kid comes along.
xxxx you know over here you are a beer
Some marry because others expect them to do so. Even if the marriage won't work, or make THEM happy, they still do it. Or they feel obligated to someone.
Some marry to get away from their parents.
Some marry because that's what you do when you grow up, get married and have kids.
But some shouldn't marry at all, and some more shouldn't have kids.
well depends on the couple really you may not have quantity but you can sure get quality
God, I'm glad I'm not married!
Anymore...
Darn! It may have helped me though.
I always say, there are people that shouldn't have kids that do, and lots of them. And then there are people that SHOULD have kids, but can't.
-A
I have to be honest, I got married because the person I had ascertained I should be married to was moving several states away, I was done with college, and it seemed like a convenient time. Given my kids, I do not regret my decision.
1:15 is Mel, anon.
And that should matter, because..?
Anonymous said...
No one knows who you are anon at 1:15, so how do you know who agrees with you or not?
July 31, 2008 1:19 AM
it doesnt matter no one knows who the other anons are either. take the parts that you think may apply
this is what i mean
if you do not like someone, fine but you dont have to calling people names. It is totally uncalled for
one part ^
you get the idea. not being snarky
just answering
they have to know her or something about her to say the things they are. obvious.
what I was saying is that if you dont like someone, or whatever the beef is. you dont have to insult someone. very simple.
doesnt matter who i am or not to understand that
Carrie, I know a girl who was only dating her husband for three months before they got married. They had been best friends for YEARS, had decided to give dating a shot.
According to her, nothing romantic about it. She loves him, but is not IN LOVE with him, just seemed convenient.
-A
xxxx you know over here you are a beer
That's funny Ergo. I was thinking more porn star.
forget it
There were some pretty good conversations going on in here earlier, I see. I've been trying to catch up...
XXXX must be the kind of stuff they don't let you see without a platinum credit card.
-A
There is nothing wrong with being single. Why make one miserable when...
Hi there mya, xxxx
1:32
No one cares if it is Bi, mel anon or whatever. They have as much right to be here like everyone else.
Why are you so concerned?
Hi, BC!
you can make so many happy.
Well, no... Not really...
Amy, I do have to clarify a bit, I did meet my husband when I was actually dating someone else (who is a band director now, take that for what you will) but I KNEW he was my husband, even though it wasn't all SCHWING. I don't know, it's hard to explain.
1:32 is Mel anon, dont let them fool you
everyone is mel anon remember?
who the hell is this mel anon
and anyone who defends someone is mel anon
and all anons are mel anon
nice anons are mel anon
mean anons are mel anon
she must run the blog huh?
how come i have never seen her
I would like to, come out you mel anon
i remember other people being accused of being someone else too
paranoia strikes again while
twilight zone music plays
I thank heavens that we live in a country where women have the choice. that is a good thing
I need to be sleeping...
1:42 / Mel anon you could not be more obvious unless you were wearing a neon sign saying who you are. Why the lies?
Kind of the same way I know the same thing about Mister. :)
No, with the chick I knew, it really was just convenient. She wanted to get married, he wanted to get married... Not necessarily to each other, but they'd just talked about the topic of getting married.
Apparently, a lot of marriages in my generation are happening like that now.
-A
toujours is mel anon
1:38 is mel anon
I am going to sleep.
G'nite everybody!
Sounds like a business merger.
11:24 is a mel anon
1:45 is mel anon
1:46 is mel anon
Who cares?
anon, drop it.
Why are you so fixated on mel anon? Have they hurt you in some way?
Why don't you sign in, BI? You're talking about people knowing you and everything, but don't sign in?
Hell, I might even be mel anon for all I know!
1:42
Hahaha, at first, I thought those were song lyrics, until I saw mel anon being mentioned
Maybe they are just curious as to why she continues to lie her fucking face off.
11:30, 11:41 is mal anon so is 12:54, so is 12:26 and so is 1:14 and here we go round the mulberry bush
see the pattern
who is mel anon? *scratches head*
the beer
Mr fourex
I used to drive past the brewery to get to Uni
it's nice beer, pretty much one of the biggest brands here, with Fosters
anyhoo titoring time
catch you all next time :)
♥xx♥
OK, g'nite now for sure.
lying about what 1:50?
Anonymous said...
Why don't you sign in, BI? You're talking about people knowing you and everything, but don't sign in?
July 31, 2008 1:48 AM
dont know them
why dont you tell every anon to sign in from today and tonight
oh, is that because you know the ones from this afternoon?
say it signed in yourself
Goodnight mya.
Lol, I'm sorry, I think this mel anon thing is absolutely funny :D
Wait!
Sort of like...
I'm a mel anon
You're a mel anon
He's a mel anon
She's a mel anon
Wouldn't you like to be a mel anon too?
I know... I'm going to sleep! You don't have to say!
Our hops plants are flourishing, they have grown all the way up the side of the house! Should be time for harvesting soon.
It is, isn't it BC?
I must have missed something, because I don't understand all the fuss.
Enjoy titoring Ergo.
I haven't laughed this hard in quite a while :)
1;46 it pretty much is a business merger, you need to be compatible about so many more things than just being in love
Being In love is a very different thing to the romantic Hollywood notion, it's about making a choice and growing together, it's a lot more complicated than a feeling
can I be mel anon too/
sorry my boy is having a relax and something to eat before we start, he comes straight from school
Anonymous said...
lying about what 1:50?
July 31, 2008 1:52 AM
dont know them
That's funny, anon 1:52, how did you even know I was talking about you unless you were them? Hmmm. Funny.
ok, this is too much.
I'm going nite nite. nitey nite
sleep tite
dont let the mal anon, or alie or lombard or promethius' bite
Isn't Mel that bald guy on the Dick Van Dyke show.
mya is funny
Ergo, when I get married I'm having a contractual agreement drawn up between my boy and me.
Things like...
- must put toilet seat in bathroom down after use.
- must realize that women are always right
etc
Mya, lol. It sure is 1:55.
As soon as I read the "you're mel anon, she's mel anon" comments, I couldn't help myself. It was funny, so much that I have tears in my eyes lol
2:01 I wish you all the very best of luck with that!
lol
make sure you add
3/ things may be behind things or turned around in fridges or cupboards so LOOK PROPERLY
4/ I will read instructions
etc etc
it saves years of torment :)
1:58, you lost me
I just asked 1:50 a question. And no, I'm not mel if that's what you are implying.
it reminds me when some anons say people on the blog are Mayo
that i never get
they have said things to miranth, martha etc that they are someone else too
i read the blogs so of course am familiar with most
I am Mel Anon.
No, Mayo is Mel Anon.
No, SS is Mel Anon.
You wouldn't be so alone
if everyone just got Mel-anoned
2:07 anons say a lot of things if you try to understand it all your head will explode
I will read instructions
That's a good one, Ergo. Next to that should go:
- must not ask location of items directly in front of me :)
i think some people get married too quick thinking they are in love when it is merely lust
what happens after that starts to dwindle and it does
Water mel-anon
Rock mel-anon
Honeydew mel-anon
we could have a fruit salad!
- must not ask location of items directly in front of me :)
that directly relates to :
the answer is No I do NOT know where your (enter name of obvious object here) is
another one:
- must not hit on me if unshowered
2:07
Yes, unfortunately, that happens a lot.
2:09,
So... how do you get Mel-Anoned? Do you have to be initiated into some secret ceremony? ^_^
2:10 or they marry not realising that it will change.
Lust is nice and great to have for each other but it's not enough and it will fade, but should be replaced by something deeper
unfortunately some see the change and think I'm not IN love so therefore it's not working
it's a decision and a partnership, not a feeling
- foot/back rub requests are not automatically an invitation for sex
yes Ergo, too right!
or kisses on cheeks, foreheads etc
Ergo, lol
- accept that putting my cold feet or hands on your back to warm up is a real sign of love
- shave, seriously, pash rash is not a good thing
- deodorant is not optional
- if you love me you will let me have the remote
haha
oh I could go on for hours lol
but mine is pretty good, have to give it to him, he puts up with me!
ok am going lovely to chat
byeeee ♥
Hahaha. Bye Ergo :)
BC you have to have the "right" mayo induct you if you can find him/h what have you
I heard that is mel anon too
you are on your own :)
Aww..Gretchen Bonaduce is on TV and she said her reality tv show did not destroy her marriage it was going down on its own
She said she was upset that her kids were being verbally attacked on youtube. she didnt expect that on the internet and about her kids no less. bothers me when they hurt kids.
so sad when people do that especially to kids
what is wrong with this world!?
or this blog at times
it amazes me and mystifies me
probably always will
sitting and reading.
Poor Gerard and his life or bad choices. Dont feel bad for the man, no, pick on him,names called about many different ones here. dont like my name brought into things but I guess it happens to all of us as I have seen
Mayo,no wonder you gets nuts with it all
I initially came to post lyrics a little while ago but got caught up in reading.I am not leaving lyrics tonight
Yep some of you are cheering. Sticks tongue out yous :p
maybe I will. muwahaha
Goodnight Ergo, I mean good afternoon! Oh, whatever. :D
Ok, you want the truth?
THERE IS NO MEL ANON. It's an urban legend.
Or, we all take turns being Mel Anon. That's always possible.
Or, Mel Anon is the ghost of Sammy Davis Jr.
Or, someone from Reprise is Mel Anon.
Take your pick! They're all true. ;)
Aw that sucks :/
and no I wasnt here that early tonight. If you must know, fell asleep after GHI and scare tactics. Woke up to my period all over me! Gross. I was cleaning everything and had to shower. Nothing like taking a shower at 1:00 am to wake you up. o_0
oh, sorry for any visuals. It happened and I hate it! I wish there was a valve to turn it off when you dont want it.
BI...TMI, girl, TMI! Other than that, how's it going?
I love when anons start fussing at each other. It's so entertaining.
Damn, I missed ergo.
Hi J if we know someone from the record company, free stuffs?
yay! just kiddin
funny Op J
Hi BC, if you are still here
.... And with all that wacky, I'm off to bed.
Well, actually to the couch.
Goodnight Lovelies, Mayo and SS!
*looks under the computer desk*
=A
Mayo
Holy crap, I’m tired. It just sorta hit me all at once. That ever happen to you? I got out of the shower and BAM. – just exhausted. So I’m just gonna say to hell with all the paperwork I’m supposed to do, ignore the book orders I need to fill and go to bed.
Sometimes you just gotta crash. I just hope I’m not too tired to sleep. Lord, I hate when that happens. Although I have to admit sometimes when I’m so tired and can’t sleep I get wonderful story ideas. Now if I’d just write them down. No, can’t do that. That would make too much sense. I’m not big into making sense. Oh, before I go I have a question. (No I really don’t think you’re gonna answer but I just thought I’d throw it out there.). If a book was written about your life what would the title be?
Night Mayo
Elena (and no “Mayo – Spread the Word” isn’t an option)
It makes me nuts. I'd rather stay away. You had an episode the other night.You handled yourself well.
I think that is what I will call them from now on. Episodes, like on a soap opera.
Hope you had a good day J.
I would feel bad if Gerard ever did read this. he would be scared out of his wits! :)
Hahaha. Or mel anon could be santa's little helper
Goodnight Amy, goodnight Elena, hope you both can get some rest tonight.
Amy, thanks for the sketch!
Elena, talk to you tomorrow! (I'm telling you, MAKE her clean the house.)
I has a blog now.
Goodnight A
Goodnight Elena
The Devil, who is kinda cute and used to be blondeish but she won't send me a new pic so who knows what the hell color her hair is now, made me do it.
Goodnight Elena, Amy, sweet dreams. Hi J, B
Hi Carrie. What is on your blog may I ask?
BC said...
Hahaha. Or mel anon could be santa's little helper
What, the dog on "The Simpsons"? HE CAN TYPE??!!
:D
BI, thanks for that. What they try to do is get me angry, cause that's when I lose my cool, and they can twist what I say more easily and make me look bad.
I've got a few things that run through my head that help focus me at times like that. They're very beneficial.
"Episodes," I like that. Kind of like saying "They had one of their spells." :D
I'm doing pretty well, BI. Ankle's swollen and hurting a bit, but not too horribly. Thanks for asking.
Carrie, you have a blog! Yay for you! Let me guess: the Devil you speak of, she be Entropy, yes? ;)
Op J and BC can i ask you a question? Dont get all bent out of shape.
I know your gonna laugh. Who is or was Mel or Mal anon? I have to know. I cant find things. Not that I look that hard.
i am not trying to start anything.
I need to know. I am curious.
If you dont want to say I understand.
I dont know who SS is either. I was assuming Frank only because I read it
Sorry about your ankle J. Hope you are better soon. Can you take ibuprofen? It might help.
Yeah, Entropy talked me into it, not that anything interesting will be on it, just like, words, BI.
Nobody knows who SS is, BI, but we DO know he's a really kind, caring, compassionate guy who visits periodically and says inspirational things. He and Mayo know each other, but how well I'm not sure.
Mel Anon was someone who came on here a month or so ago, maybe longer?, who got her name b/c she likes Mel Brooks movies. I didn't talk to her very much. There seemed to be some idea that she was pretending to know somebody or other. I don't know for sure what happened.
Stop perceiving everyone here to be so stupid.
BC, if you put the B before the J, that would be hysterical! I had to.
Was funny, Is funny. Hello B,J.
I have a strange sense of humor I know
Words carry alot of weight Carrie
BI, yeah, I take ibuprofen or tramadol and orphenadrine (pain pill and muscle relaxer). I take those last 2 for my arthritis, too. I think it's been swelling b/c I sit at the computer too long sometimes. Cuts the circulation off and all that.
Carrie, it doesn't have to have anything profound on it. Just whatever you want to write. Sometimes I put song lyrics up. Whoopee doo!
B, well, we still don't know who SS is, but with mel anon, many anons assumed she was another blogger that goes by the name Alie, but you know, anons like to create conspiracy theories and such.
J, yep, the dog ^_^
Entropy is *still* the Devil? Doesn't she ever take a vacation? Lol
Hi BJ, hehe
Oh, thanks J, I see.
Thus the connection some make that Gerard may be Mayo and SS may be Frank.
Anon @ 3:03 who are you directing the qiestion to? If its me. Sorry if you dont like it you dont have to read. Scroll past.
I do not percieve anything of anyone. However, you do for some strange reason
it doesnt sound as if that Mel anon did much of anything then.
People can read whatever they want into things and obsess about things and run with it and assume things that are not true.
What if they did know someone? Who cares. I have seen many say they know this one or that one. I never cared or questioned them.
Anon do not question me anymore. It is not appreciated. i ahev answred and will not answer you anymore
Please do not percieve me as stupid either
Wow J. I hope it helps. Pain sucks.
BC, you naughty girl. Too funny.
Hey dogs are nice,no? They make loyal pets I think anyway.
So, my dears, it's after 3 and I need to sleeeeeeeeeep.
Goodnight BC, BI, BJ (oh wait, that's partly me!), have a good night. I'll see you tomorrow, probably.
love, faith, hope, peace, happiness
I must succumb to the Sandman. Night, blog denizens, can't believe you finally sucked me into the quagmire of blogdom.
Aw, there you go assuming I was talking to you again. How do you do that unless you didn't know? So weird.
What if they did know someone? Who cares. I have seen many say they know this one or that one. I never cared or questioned them.
How did you know she hinted at knowing things if you have never heard of her?
Anon do not question me anymore
So you know this wasn't the first time I questioned you. You were the anon that went "nite nite".
I think you think everyone here is stupid. You are way obvious, but still think we don't notice or able to read.
Ahaha. Whats on your mind J?
Have a good night ladies.Sleep well
Mayo,
It's a quiet night, only the scratch and buzz of the insects in our "backyard". No rain, no thunder, no wind, no nothing. Just the dark, the insects, the cats, and me.
Lot of Vultures saying I'm angry with you for not talking to me. Nope nope nope. I'm not angry with you. You know what I was talking to you about.
Remember who your friends are. That thought will help you more than you believe.
Goodnight, Mayo. Take care, and rest well.
mayo,
we had a rainstorm today...well, properly, a thunderstorm. but the minute i heard the rain, i found myself heading outside.
i stayed under the eaves of the house, no need to court electrocution, but i needed to hear the rain. i needed to be out in it, even if i wasn't getting drenched.
so i sat on the doorstep, on heels and haunches, and watched the rain. the air was thick and hot, not fresh like it ought to be, but otherwise, it was perfect.
i truly, truly love the rain. it is comforting and nourishing. i even enjoyed it back in may, waiting all day in it drenched through and through in front of madison square garden. i was cold and miserable, but there was a part of me that relished having a reason to not listen to common sense and come in out of the rain. it was delicious freedom to just allow the rain to soak me to my skin and even to my bones.
i guess i really am an earth witch...i need to be watered at regular intervals. *grin*
all this is good as i am probably heading back to seattle. if i had returned to the pacific northwest earlier, it would have felt like a defeat. but i've been looking at all the cities were i might live, and tallying up the resources available to me in each, and seattle is looking like the winner.
maybe not forever, but i need to get my feet back under me.
and i do so love the rain.
next time it rains in your area, mayo, go out and just open yourself up and really feel it. smell the water in the air, allow the energized ions to draw a smile from you, listen as the droplets hit every surface like a soft secure blanket of sound. rain's a good thing.
and after all, i'm the one who should be worrying about melting, so just try it. rain softens the boundaries between you and the world, i promise.
and now, just as another storm rolls in, i'm going off to bed. zeus will sing me my lullaby tonight. (go, zeus! *grin*)
good night, mayo. i am imagining that you will have a smile tomorrow, if you don't mind my presumption. it gives me a smile of my own just thinking about it.
:)
Carrie! I'm sorry, I didn't say "goodnight" to you!
GOODNIGHT CARRIE! I left you a message on your NEW BLOG!
See you tomorrow. :)
Anon, just lay off. What would you do if you found out BI IS Mel? Then what? Tar and feathers? Run off the blog on a rail? Firing squad? SO WHAT? We don't know who YOU are, either...and if we did, what would THAT matter?
Goodnight B, Carrie, J, sweet dreams
P.S. Dogs are indeed nice.
I'm off to bed as well. Goodnight to anyone here
This is not intended for anyone, but for all who enjoy the power of words
Hard to notice gleaming from the sky,
when you're staring at the cracks.
Hard to notice what is passing by with eyes lowered.
You... walked away, heard them say
"Poison hearts will never change,"
walk away again.
( not 3:03, or 3:19 )
Anonymous said...
Aw, there you go assuming I was talking to you again. How do you do that unless you didn't know? So weird.
Please read properly, i said If you are talking to me
here, let me help you:
"Anon @ 3:03 who are you directing the qiestion to? If its me. Sorry if you dont like it you dont have to read. Scroll past."
No one likes anons who try to taint another's name or twist what they said or cause problems. Please dont. I do like all of you here. Not the anons who try to berate everyone at the drop of a hat.
To think I prayed for some of you here,cared when you were ill.Sent well wishes and posted some lyrics for you.
Maybe I am a fool. I dont really care. May be you are the fool? I dont know. I dont care.
I will not go on with you. I will feel sorry for you
3.31, powerful words, to be sure. Thank you for giving them to us.
Walking away again.
Goodnight. Rest well.
Goodnight BC. Sweet dreams
*yawns* strecthes, getting sleepy. Good about time.
Any Noise / Anti-Noise
It's gracious of you
to hold your arms
throw your charms around me
it's gracious of you
to lead me by the hand
i really love you
it's gracious of you
to be by my side, rolling wild
reeling thunder
it's gracious of you
come again, come again to me
and save me the need to say goodbye
and why would i ask of you, need to say goodbye
say it, say it, oh, i don't know how to say this,
please, here leave me warm, hollowed and open.
(yodeling.... ) one more.... (more yodeling)
and then leave, yeah.
it's gracious of you to hold me while
i don't want to say goodbye, yeah...
oh goodbye...... it's too soon for me to
say goodbye, say goodbye hey, it's warm here
say goodbye leave it cold again, cold again.
say, say goodbye.
Bi,
I almost hear you in two voices
Thank You OP J
Thank You all for an experience I
can say that much.
Triston You will be missed.
Wendy, I miss you and love reading you and you knows it!
A- you are too funny
BC, you are genuine as I said before.
Ergo, sorry I missed you
You're reacting the same way you did when you were under the "Mel" name.
Don't feel sorry for me, I see. I feel sorry for you, though, for thinking you can fool us, but fail. Epic fail.
Hi Precious,
The sky here is covered with clouds, and the ground is waiting for the rain that's coming. There's literally no traffic noises, no dogs barking, no stray neighbors coming in late from a party, no one leaving yet for work.
Just...almost complete silence. It's quite peaceful.
I hope that, wherever you are tonight, you're peaceful too. Maybe it's quiet there; maybe it's raining. Whichever it is, may you find some comfort in the night's darkness.
Today I felt my strength returning. I looked at the issue I'd made for myself (i.e., it wasn't a real issue), and realized I'd let my nerve slip. No more of that. I can do ANYthing, and you know why?
Because I'm strong. You know what I'm saying.
Take it easy tomorrow, honey, it's Thursday. Good cartoons on Cartoon Network in the PM; yep, that's what I said. :D
Goodnight, baby. I love you.
My heart to yours, always.
"Epic fail"?
Anyone here?
Mean anons - please, don't bother to respond.
For the anon who said the following:
It is an unalterable law that people who claim to care about the human race are utterly indifferent to the sufferings of individuals.
July 30, 2008 6:59 PM
Truer words were never spoken.
(But I saw it attributed to this dude : Quinten Crisp, Resident Alien, whoever that may be.)
Hi J! I hope you are well?
Just trying to catch up...
Anon @ 3:13 are you really not there or something. They told me, I asked. You need to read more and do less talking. You are making yourself out to sound silly at this point.
Mel Anon was someone who came on here a month or so ago, maybe longer?, who got her name b/c she likes Mel Brooks movies. I didn't talk to her very much. There seemed to be some idea that she was pretending to know somebody or other. I don't know for sure what happened. By OpJ
and two
Bleeding Chaos said...
B, well, we still don't know who SS is, but with mel anon, many anons assumed she was another blogger that goes by the name Alie, but you know, anons like to create conspiracy theories and such.
poor thing. get some sleep. it will do you well
Maybe we're different, but we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden, running through our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You come between just who you are and who you wanna be
If you feel alone, and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning, is some beginning's end
[Chorus]
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are
When everybody's in, and you're left out
And you feel your drowning, in a shadow of a doubt
Everyones a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself, not what other people say
When it seems you're lost, alone and feeling down
Remember everybody's different
Just take a look around
[Chorus]
Be who you want to, be who you are
Everyones a hero, everyones a star
When you wanna give up, and your hearts about to break
Remember that you're perfect, God makes no mistakes
[Chorus]
Hey Miranth, you just caught me.
Quentin Crisp is an English essayist (I think so, I know he's a writer of something or other) who lives in NYC. The only other thing I can tell you about him is that Sting wrote a song about him called "Englishman in New York." Pretty puny bit of info, but there ya go.
Goodnight!
Are you serious? Yeeeeaah, right, your nuts are showing.
Thanks J!
An anon quoted him, but without attribution, and I was curious, as its a truth I've only recently come to accept. While no rules are hard and fast in this world, the truth in that seemingly hypocritical statement is hard to deny at this point.
I'm still trudging through comments.
And what the hell is up with all of the hate?
Uh, I don't have any nuts... well walnuts and almonds, but almonds are actually a fruit.
:D
Crazy, well, then, yes :)
IB - Are you leaving? Please don't let the anons get to you. They want the control that they claim mayo has.
I do amuse myself greatly :D More wine for everybody! The Ukuzala is actually pretty good...
Have you burnt them yet?
Anon fails. says the same thing all the time. you can all go read, this fails, that fails. epic fails.
Mayo, you have my sympathies and you know it. I like some here that will not change. Makes you wonder of the state of the world why it is the way it is. Rotten people are in it. There is no happiness, just an empty shell, a hollow hull.
Why people are nasty, accusatory, even paranoid. Puffed up with pride. trying to look "cool" in front of peers. isnt that what you wrote about. Yeah, I thought you did. I mean I read it.
They are still out there. Waiting to jump on anyone they can, even you Mayo. I do not need you to talk to me as others do. Have never expected that. Not saying it wouldnt be appreicated, but not needed.
Do you ever feel sorry for them?
They jumped all over OP J the other night for a couple of DAYS.
Then it was pick on Gerard (that goes on frequently)
Then it was pick on Elena for a tiny bit.
Then pick on other anons. Which arent always other anons we all know this. they have even said it. Yes, it has slipped every so often. Oh, that was just me they say.
Then it was a pick on someone I dont know,dont even know if they
were here or not
Then my turn. Whatever. It goes in cycles it seems.
Yes, the bullies are out in full force. Maybe they arent getting enough lovin. Who knows?
Most bullies do not like to be ignored. Mayo watch the bullies. Watch the corners, they are hiding everywhere.
I say it like it is, some dont like it. I say too bad. Sometimes things need to be said.
I will not continue to fuel their feeding frenzy.
Some do not know what to think. That is ok.
This blog goes back and forth. Warm, cold. Thus so do I. I dont know who to trust or care about anymore. Others have said it. I feel for some of you and then you try and aggrevate or taunt me.
(and others)I care, I dont care, I care. I try to care. Always hoping others will "get it". That when there are special times here, we should embrace them. People are too quick to cut that down. Some people are downright mean and you may nevr change it. Stop it in its tracks. Stop Love or caring in its tracks?! Will never happen. Should never happen. Think about it.
Goodnight to you all
Miranth, I am here. Only for a few. No one makes me do anything I dont want to do. Remember. We are all strong women here? How are you?
I would love some wine if you are offering.
How are you? I hope well.
Here's a glass, BI, I chilled it for you.
I am fine, just not cool with the hate around here. I know that there are people here, there and everywhere with whom I disagree, but I do try to understand them, even if I can't 'get' their point of view.
Life's a bitch/bastard :) and everyone deals as well as they can. *shrugs* And, yes, this includes rock stars and whomever...
Anyway, I know we are all strong women. That doesn't worry me at all! :)
How are you?
3:31 said...
Bi,
I almost hear you in two voices
July 31, 2008 3:40 AM
thats not me.
thanks Miranth. the chilled wine is delish.
That will surely do the trick an put me to sleep fo real.
:)
I am fine. Thanks. Tired.You are up late and I havent seen you in quite some time. the question is how are you?
Hate is never cool Miranth. You are so right.
Dont mean to drink and run but my eyelids are heavy and closing on me fast!
Nice to see you again. Thanks for your words.
Words do have an impact and can hurt or heal.
Goodnight Miranth. Goodnight all
You know, BI, I think they're frustrated that they don't know who mayo is. I thought I knew, but I am not sure now, and it doesn't really matter. It didn't matter in the first place, at least until mayo made it my business.
Anyway, I am no fan-person, in any case, so it matters not, to me.
I do like to meet people 'of good character' and I think that's what counts. I sound so silly, but whatever...
PS - Just refreshed - I am good, just having trouble in real life with the above (meeting people of good character.) I used to have a sixth sense about people - and lately it has failed me. And I am friendly, so I have to be careful. At least I am aware of the problem!
Sorry - It took me a long time to type that - and now I am not sure if I should leave it?
Goodnight BI - and Sweet Dreams :)
Angel, angel or so
Wherever you may go
Hmm, yeah...
I'll follow
And always will I be there
Shake worries from your hair
Hmm, yeah...
I'll be there
Always, wherever you may go
Thank You Miranth. I know what you are talking about.I am a good "read" of people. I do not like to say judge at all.
Do not question yourself. Go with your first instincts as they are usually right.Use your sixth sense.
I should live by that more often.
Why shouldnt you leave that there? Why Not? Who cares. I care. :)
Very nice about angels anon.
:)
Will you? Always?
The mean anons may feed on it! I am not here during the day, but others may suffer.
I do trust my first instinct, but it hasn't been entirely correct of late. Growing up in Detroit, I really did have a supernatural ability to read people - to protect myself - even from a very young age. Lately, the charisma of some has sidetracked me. I meet some of the most unusual people - and its hard to tell beyond the showmanship. If that makes any sense.
:)
Hi angel :) You're back!?!
I miss your beautiful words...
Thank You Miranth for your kind words. They are appreciated more than you know.
Try and look at things in your life from above as if you are a bystander looking on. That may help give you more of a perspective on who and or why your senses may be off lately.
Take care. Be well. Sweet dreams.
I must get some sleep.
Hugs Miranth.
Always
you do talk in two, despite what you say, some things cannot be hidden
angel said...
Will you? Always?
July 31, 2008 4:55 AM
me? care always? always. I cant help it. Its in my blood. Makes a fool sometimes? Sometimes but I take my chances. :)
Nice to meet you Angel. If you were speaking to me or not. I think you were. Sorry if you werent.
thank you always, now it is quite clear
Only briefly, friend Miranth, and quietly. I trust you are well. Now I must take my leave. Until we meet again...rest well.
A fair evening to you as well, my love, my heart.
*Hugs* BI - Thank you for your help - and I shall do as you suggest!
You take care of yourself as well, though I know you are a strong person. And we are all here for each other, at some time or another. :)
Your kindness reminds me of someone else, as well, but I do not hear you in two voices. :)
*hugs*
I am now delerious thanks to you guys.
Thanks. Goodnight.Falls on the floor from shear exhaustion.
I care but I dont like mean people.
What is so hard to understand about that?
Goodnight! ♥
out cold
goodnight bi/always
goodnight Miranth/angel
Lovely to see you, angel. And I hope you are also well... and your love, too.
:)
Anon at 5:02 - I think its BI's sweetness that you are reading as someone else. And yes, there is more than one sweet person on this blog.
Of that, I am positive.
Anon 5:10 - Its miranth AND angel, as we are not the same. Though I do thank you for your goodnight and wish you one as well.
To my love, my heart -
You know where to find me. I shall be waiting for you there. Soon we shall be together again, one day never to part.
I think you two are quite cute.
Sorry angel, you just missed bi, sweet dreams
Why would BI and Miranth be flirting with each other? That's ridiculous.
Correct 5:23. We are not.
I am neither angel, nor her love. I am glad, though, that they still visit here.
:)
goodnight bi/always
Sorry, but we are two different people. Thank you for the goodnight though.
I don't think so. It's just as ridiculous as Angel coming here to talk to her love, when she can email them.
Anonymous said...
I love everyone here!
Does that make it true? No matter how many times I say it, it doesn't.
Thank you, person who has their head together and doesn't trust an anonymous blog person.
Just because he says it doesn't make it true.
Yup, it's all too easy to talk the talk...
"Strawberries, cherries and an angel's kiss in spring
My summer wine is really made from all these things...."
Good morning/afternoon/evening SS, Mayo, Miranth, Ergo, Amy, J, BC, Elena, Carrie, Beloved....everyone I missed last night; the possibly soon to arrive Kass, FASC and Possum; various friendly/fun anons, watchers and lurkers; all squirrels and nuts in the land o’blogbelieve!
How are you all today? Well, happy and still pain free, I hope! Me? Well, my mouth pain is nearly gone; but, my stomach does not seem to like this fresh, new course of antibiotics - at all. Oh well. I suppose I shall just have to guzzle tons of Pepto again!
MissT: Snogs right back at you! Did I read something about you putting your head in a bird cage? Okay, what were you drinking? ;) Congratulations on the success of that endeavor! Bigger congratulations for getting your head out! *wink again*
Ergo: KISS, KISS, KISS and *smooooch too*!!!! Oh no, you forgot to add Kill Hannah to your list! I suppose I can forgive you, this time. ;)
I can honestly say that no band or song has ever transformed or “saved” my life. I can, however, say that I love music and music has made some tough times a little more bearable. Sometimes, it’s a song from an artist you don’t usually listen to. Sometimes the words seem as though they were whispered by your own soul, bled from your own heart - born of your own tears.
Such was the case with Bette Midler’s “Wind Beneath My Wings”. In fact, the words “The wind beneath our wings” are engraved on my dad’s ‘tombstone’. That song will always be very special to me.
And, of course, music can make good times even better!
Now, if anyone asked for a list of my favorite bands, that would cover everyone from AC/DC and Black Sabbath to Yngwie Malmstrom and Zebra (and back again - maybe thrice- with every stop at H being HIM)! :P
Speaking of lyrics, I spotted AFI lyrics two nights in a row. Good choice anon! Thank you!
For your pondering consideration today:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“The language we use to communicate with one another is like a knife. In the hands of a careful and skilled surgeon. A knife can work to do great good. But in the hands of a careless or crude person, a knife can cause great harm."
Exactly as it is with our words.”
Source Unknown
And
In childhood, the rule of behavior is "If it annoys people, keep doing it." In adulthood, the rule of behavior is "If it makes people happy, keep doing it."
J. E. Brown
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wishing everyone a day filled with non annoying adults (and only mildly annoying children).
Hugs and Love,
~Namaste~
6/Wendy
PS: Miranth, I would really, really like to take you up on that gracious offer of wine. Unfortunately, I can not.
*le sigh*
I'll be ready to grab that glass on the 12th. I hope! :P
5:28 words are too important to be frivolously thrown around.
People can say anything, whether you believe it, is another matter...actions speak louder than words in a lot of cases.
...and I will keep on believing what I will until I see otherwise.
5:28 - occasionally, ...very occasionally... it is true, though.
And if it is the anon that I think it is who did say those words, it may very well be.
I am not quite so generous with my heart, but I can understand the impetus and the understanding that would make it so. Anyway, I am prob. wrong on all counts, but I could be right...
Have faith.
:)
Pardon me, I would just like to answer before anyone asks:
I am not ANGEL, ALWAYS or MEL ANON (any of them).
Having said that, Hi Angel! Nice to see your wings and your words again.
Hi Mel (if you lurk).
Always: Hello to you as well, whomever you may be.
Miranth: Mail is on the way!
Goodnight everyone. Sweet dreams to one and all!
*blows kisses*
Wendy, I'll keep it chilled for you!
And I never did receive my email... in fact, I prob. wrote you another in the interim.
Little guy keeping you too busy? :) I understand.
:) Take care
What is going on in here is a fantasy...maybe some get their emotional rocks off in this place.
So, it's 4:33 am, and I'm still awake. It's been hard for me to sleep lately, Mayo. Insomnia? Maybe. lol. That's what my friend tells me, because he has it.
Anyone still around?
Anon616 no need to explain. I think someone said bi is always
That's possible, too, anon at 5:37. I am not privy to most of what occurs here, so I can't know.
I can just conceive of some circumstances under which certain things may be possible, if not probable, though as I am a watcher and not a participant, I cannot know for sure. I only have some guesses.
And, yes, I watch and read too many mysteries! :D
HI P♥
I am afflicted, as well! But I do have some chores to accomplish, but I will check back as I can...
The anonymooses distracted me.
:)
And I still haven't caught up!
I think the correct term is anonymi, Miranth.
The words of love are pretty, but they lack substance.
*runs back in*
Paperheart!!!!! *huge hug* How's your piercing? Is the swelling down? I think it looks great!
Miranth: Yahoo has been doing strange things with my mail. They seem to be disappearing into the vast unknown. If you don't recieve it, let me know. *hugs*
5:39 anon: Thank you! I just thought I would make the public announcement while I was here. ;) and *hugs for you too*
Okay, I really must be off now.
Have fun today, everyone!
Hey Miranth, 5:45 and Wendy!! <3
Wendy, the swelling is still there, and thanks!
So is everyone leaving me now?
lol
Anonymous said...
Anon616 no need to explain. I think someone said bi is always
July 31, 2008 5:39 AM
always said...
goodnight bi/always
Sorry, but we are two different people. Thank you for the goodnight though.
July 31, 2008 5:26 AM
Always said that she is not bi.
No paperheart, I had a long sleep much earlier on, so now I cannot sleep :(
How are you, is anything troubling you?
^ And before I am accused, I am neither bi or always or angel or mel anon.
Sorry, but we are two different people. Thank you for the goodnight though.
People can say anything, whether you believe it, is another matter
Awwh. Well I'm glad that I'm not the only one here then! ^_^
Well, the only thing bugging me right now is the fact that I have 6 shifts next week, and I had 6 this week. So I can't really enjoy my summer holidays too well.
Wendy - I'll go back and check....
Thanks 5:45! 'anonymi' :) And they may lack substance, but they may not. I am in no position to know, nor should I be, in truth.
PH! How are guitar lessons? I was glad to read that things are going well for you, too. You should take the time to relax - don't stress no matter how much others think you should!
I learned that the hard way. :)
My lessons are great! The instructor canceled my lessons for this week, so that kind of disappointed me! We've been working on a couple songs, The Beatles and Green Day (quite the contrast)!
PH-
Green Day for the WIN! My friends HATE the Beatles, but I don't mind them.
I am sorry to hear you have so much work to do! You can always ask them to cut down your hours if it is too overwhelming...
Paperheart, are they pressuring you to work these hours? I think you should be out there trying to have some fun during the break.
I for sure prefer Green Day! I mean, I like The Beatles, but it's definitely not what I want to play personally.
And I don't totally mind it, because my checks will be bigger, and it gives me something to do, I just wish I didn't have to do a ten hour shift on Monday!
Rawr?
Nicee.
And 6:04, it's not that they are pressuring me, it's that the older workers are going on holidays, so we teenagers have to pick up their hours. I want to go out and have fun, desperately, but I don't know anymore. Sadly, my life is consumed by work this summer.
*sigh*
Do you get any spare time to go to the mall, or see a movie with your friends?
At least you do get a bigger paycheck - and get to make decisions about what to do with the money.
DId you do the D and D quiz?
I will post my results in a minute...
You Are A:
Neutral Good Elf Bard (4th Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength- 12
Dexterity- 12
Constitution- 14
Intelligence- 16
Wisdom- 15
Charisma- 14
Alignment:
Neutral Good- A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them. Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias for or against order. However, neutral good can be a dangerous alignment because it advances mediocrity by limiting the actions of the truly capable.
Race:
Elves are known for their poetry, song, and magical arts, but when danger threatens they show great skill with weapons and strategy. Elves can live to be over 700 years old and, by human standards, are slow to make friends and enemies, and even slower to forget them. Elves are slim and stand 4.5 to 5.5 feet tall. They have no facial or body hair, prefer comfortable clothes, and possess unearthly grace. Many others races find them hauntingly beautiful.
Class:
Bards- Bards often serve as negotiators, messengers, scouts, and spies. They love to accompany heroes (and villains) to witness heroic (or villainous) deeds firsthand, since a bard who can tell a story from personal experience earns renown among his fellows. A bard casts arcane spells without any advance preparation, much like a sorcerer. Bards also share some specialized skills with rogues, and their knowledge of item lore is nearly unmatched. A high Charisma score allows a bard to cast high-level spells.
Anonymous said...
I love everyone here!
Does that make it true? No matter how many times I say it, it doesn't.
Thank you, person who has their head together and doesn't trust an anonymous blog person.
Just because he says it doesn't make it true.
Yup, it's all too easy to talk the talk...
Mayo says he loves you but actions speak louder than words.
5:28 words are too important to be frivolously thrown around.
People can say anything, whether you believe it, is another matter... actions speak louder than words in a lot of cases.
...and I will keep on believing what I will until I see otherwise.
July 31, 2008 5:32 AM
6:17 you're a bit late. It was already covered in the above post.
Yes but my point was specifically about Mayo.
Well, I work IN THE MALL. lol. So I'm there everyday. You can imagine how sick of the place I am!
And Miranth, I am bad with paydays. My money is gone within a week. lol. And I get paid every second Friday.
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