I am fueled by provocation, currently deliberating my constitution.
The witness having brought to light new evidence, the accused pleads guilty on all charges pending. The defendant has been bound over for sentencing.
p.s. judge and jury, impartial. injunction exempt.
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Hawt.
You on, Mayo?
Oh, and uhh, I hope by "bury the hatchet" you don't mean like, in someone's skull.
Hello Mayo.
I've been getting a complex about you never posting whilst I'm around.
Nice to finally meet you.
why?
so good evening. blah blah blah
yeh dont you know it
I am fueled by provocation
Most people use food, you should try it some time. I hear it's good for you.
OP's could you post your post again please
Looks like it's just us for now.
So, can you say what it is that you've been accused of doing, that is so off-color? I know what you're getting at, or at least what we're supposed to gather from this. This "behavior," is it something we'd know about?
I understand if you can't be totally forthcoming but, i think you know where I'm headed with this.
I will delete this if the need arises. I can do that now.
Say what? Legal speak. Where's John Grisham when you need him?
Bury the hatchet?
Yeah, I'm with K. You don't mean in somebody's skull, right?
Right?
Come on Mayo-naze. Talk to us. Pretty please?
I've been pouting all night and I can do it here, too.
Hi, Mayo!
Yes, I'm back from the dead...
What is this all about?
What is going on?
Who is the accused? Are you prosecuting or on the defense?
Good to hear from you, Mayo. Did you get your riddle from the previous post?
Love ya,
L.
maybe the characters are the characters in his life. but who would they be.
witness?
defendant?
accused?
You haven't been on to talk with us in a while, Jason Bourne. Come on, quit lurking for a sec.
"New evidence"?
ohhh mya. could you email please. my emil is on my profile
Am I too late for the party?
Happy Birthday Pixie. Best of life to you!
You know what movie this made me think about?
Primal Fear.
Edward Norton playing Richard Gere for a fool.
I don't know why.
Anyhooo.....
injunction exempt
So does this mean the ghost imposed gag has been removed?
er...this is good, i think.
is this good?
jury duty is not helping me with your post tonight, i'm afraid, mayo, but i'm glad to see it nonetheless.
The party is still going on, Mayo. ^_^
Not at all, Mayo. I saved you some cheese dip.
Please excuse the wool...
Guess you can't answer the question here in public? I hear ya.
Offer still stands to answer your question though. Kapunua@yahoo.com. I doubt it's important to you anymore, but maybe.
Am I too late for the party?
That depends on how good you are at party games ;)
Mayo grab a sheep and join the fun.
MAYONAISE
i am sure when pixie reads your comment she will have a huge smile on her face
thank you so much
Elena said...
Mayo grab a sheep and join the fun.
There's something you don't hear everyday.
...Right? ^_^;;
Elena said...
Mayo grab a sheep and join the fun.
There's something you don't hear everyday.
Or do you Mayo?
ok, so we all had to bring something for the party -- what did you bring, mayo? ;D
Hi Mayo!
Come back!!!
So things happened and stuff. Cool.
You should join the party, you're not too late at all. We can always use some Mayo.
Thanks to Miss T. for her email earlier today. I'm a bit behind...
He's probably rendered speechless by the antics next door.
mayo would bring a whip.
crack that whip baby.
you know you like it bitch
Hang on a minute, Bert isn't still next door is he? Oh, blimey!
Mayo....
Are you still here?
that's so cool that you went next door, mayo.
Fimble Star said...
mayo would bring a whip.
crack that whip baby.
you know you like it bitch
See Fimble, and this is why I *heart* you.
Did I mention that the princess practices law at night????
Yep. I've watched enough Law & Order and CSI over the years, I've earned myself a law degree.
Let me know if you need some royal representation. I'm pretty expensive but I'm well worth it.
Trust me. ^_~
Mayo, that was just darling of you.
But why is there wool stuck to your pants? And is that lanolin on your hands?
Hello Mya, how the devil are you?
Long time no speak.
Damn Lil' Fim, you show him.
Kapunua said...
But why is there wool stuck to your pants? And is that lanolin on your hands?
Oh hell I just spit coffee on the screen.
"as your lawyer I'd advise you not to answer that question"
oh jules. you know i heart you to. its all about the love and he aim.
mayo i hope you took a sheep with you when youshut the door after yourself in dm. did you have a wee chat with bert when you as there
sdock10 will be so happy.
Hello everybody!
I'm doing much, MUCH better! Thank you!
OMG help me.... please help me... You have no idea!
That was me. I'm just playin' wityoo boy.
Good to hear Mya :)
Mayo,
Are you ready to tell us who you are?
mya. are you still here?
but..but..he swore I was the only one. he told me he'd never felt this way about any other sheep!
Men..only after one thing!
Tell us Mayo's sheep. Please tell us....
Mayo,do you think we throw cool ass parties?
I think we do, who else gives away sheep at the door?
I have just another moment or two before I have to go...
I wanted to thank you all for your time. You have all been an incredible source of insight. Might I say that I have come to rely on you?
I have.
Take your riddle with you, Mayo.
We feel the same for you, my dear.
We love you.
L.
.
is that a fairwell note?
I can hardly speak about it, it's too traumatic!
The...the things he makes me say! With my limited vocabulary! I don't understand... The metaphors! *whimpers*
THE BELT BUCKLE!
Mayo, where is it that you going?
Are you ready to tell us who you are?
Is he heck as like!
I hope you don't intend to leave indefinitely Mayo.
We all care for you.
Do you know how much we have come to rely on you?
Still getting hugs and kisses from me. Do I get any back?
XOXO,
Princess
im sorry things arent going well for you mayo
Mayo you may say it and may I say that we are very happy to hear it.
Could you please answer one little question?
Truthfully How are you feeling tonigth?
Aww FImble, everything Mayo says sounds like "goodbye," but I don't think that it is. ^_^
Mayo, I think it's fair to say that we rely on you in some weird way, too. And not just because you give us a nice cabana to hang out in, either. But I guess, I dunno, we like you. Well, I don't want to speak for everyone, but you know.
I suck at this niceness stuff. >_>
He says:
Do you like that sheep?
Fuck, yeah you do!
and I do.
Fimble, yes, I am still here.
Might I say that I have come to rely on you?
That's what families are for poppet.
cool mya.
could i ask you a favour could you email me please m address is in my profile
its important. please
Dependence isn't a good thing, Mayo.
Maybe you should just be?
Just be with us.
Mayo
doesnt matter who you are
you are part of the family
you are welcome in all of our houses
please take care. we look out for our family. Please look out for us
have a fantastic rest of your day, mayo. it's so good to hear from you.
it's so good to know a bit of what we mean to you.
Mayo, that was quite nice of you. It's nice to hear that.
Thank you for this place. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have made these amazing friends.
I actually have come to like you so it's been nice of you to stick around.
I suck at this niceness stuff. >_>
I swear, were we separated at birth, Jules?
It makes me feel icky.
smoke&venom20 said...
I suck at this niceness stuff. >_>
I swear, were we separated at birth, Jules?
It makes me feel icky.
I know, it's like drinking a quart of Hi-C, eating a whole bag of cotton candy, throwing it up, and then eating it again. Sweetness! Ugh! ;D
The witness having brought to light new evidence:
I say there's a third party we've not been informed about. Just a thought, though.
the accused pleads guilty on all charges pending
The accused, I assume, is Mayo.
The defendant has been bound over for sentencing.
It's out and on the table, perse. Something's coming out maybe. It's almost done. Maybe?
judge and jury, impartial
Um, outsiders. Outside of the inner circle. "Glassed eyes and lighters."
injunction exempt
"an equitable remedy in the form of a court order, whereby a party is required to do, or to refrain from doing, certain acts"
^^^That. It ain't happening.
Well goodnight Mayo, I really must away to my bed.
It's been nice to meet you in the flesh so to speak.
Take care lamb.
Good night all.
TTFN
I emailed you, Fimble!
Hey you guys, check out this guy trying to jump ut of airplanes without a parachute, but with a FLYING SQUIRREL SUIT, and land safely.
Sweet! Except that he's probably gonna die.
'Night, GS :)
Okay, so I've been ill nearly all week, and I just woke up now, in the middle of the night because I had a 'weird feeling.'
So, as strange as it sounds, I somehow new Mayo was going to post. Shame I missed him though, I've never been around to meet him before.
mya. i replied thank you sooooooo much
Good Night, Mayo. or Good Day, depending on where you are.
And if you ever wonder if this blog has made an impression on us, know that today I accidently asked for "Mayoflex" instead of "Myoflex" muscle cream.
Pretty deep impression I would say. :)
Love you,
L.
hey jules. cheers for that.
that is some cezy video. i would be to scared to jump out without a parachute.
i would need at least two bottles of vodka
So why is it everytime after Mayo shows up then leaves I suddenly feel like I need to sit back and light a cigarette?
i would need at least two bottles of vodka
One for each hand?
i know what you're talking about, l.
today i was reading a manga, and when a character asked if they should bring along the mayo for dinner, i sat and grinned loopily at the page for...longer than necessary, let's just say. ;)
indeed rw. both at the same time to.
what is your poison
That is the freakiest effin' suit I have ever seen.
WTF would make you want to jump out of a plane without a parachute?
Why?
Princess doesn't understand!!!
Elena said...
So why is it everytime after Mayo shows up then leaves I suddenly feel like I need to sit back and light a cigarette?
Do you feel like you just scored? ^_~
Well I got a call the other day about an account and when I asked the guy his name he said "____ Mayo"
I about fell out of my fucking chair.
I feel...worn out yet somehow satisfied.
Oh yeah......
So you've provoked someone into convicting you on all counts.
If you're looking for a bail bondsman, I know this little place...
Just kiddin', darlin'. I'm perfectly willing to be a witness.
Whether for the prosecution or the defense, depends on the situation.
indeed rw. both at the same time to.
what is your poison
That would have to be tequila, FS. It is the only hard liquor I can drink straight.
Sometimes the whispers cant always be heard.
It would be surprising if that dude made it. I think that is crazy but okay.
Good luck with that!
Are the "accused" and the "defendant" the same person?
Heya dude!
oh my fucking god rw. i love tequila
i cant drink it with the lemon and salt. i have to do it sraight. but i dooo lovvvvveeeee
i could drink it all night
I'm thinking yes to your question, RW.
Hi, Anon! Are you talking about the riddle?
Don't blame you there! I would have never gotten it!
I would not recommend drinking tequila all night long, FS! I had a bad experience with that once in Houston...
Anonymous said...
Sometimes the whispers cant always be heard.
You know what is usually heard though? A chainsaw.
Sometimes the whispers cant always be heard.
I know! Sometimes I whisper and I try to be all quiet and stuff and I just get ignored. So then I yell!!!!
That always gets me some attention.
Are you really talking about the riddle or just in general?
ohhhhh rw.
do tell it sounds fun
Not the riddle Mya. Just the people that come in here to get ignored.
SURE THING, KAP.
Wow, I just got snarky on the wrong blog. FTL!
Yet, posting under an anon does get me much more attention. Which do I prefer?
wow anon. you have come back again
how have you been its been a couple of days since you last posted that.
do you wanna chat this time and maybe other people can hear the whispers
ohhhhh rw.
do tell it sounds fun
Truth to be told, FS, there's not a lot to tell. Just a night out drinking with friends in Houston during spring break. Was a lot of fun at the time, but was deeply regretted several hours later when the dry heaving started. And the hangover the following day was not pretty.
Oh, OK, Anon. Then you're talking about me! HaHa
Okay, I don't get it.
Now I know the Anon's been here before.
Why can't everyone just get along?
Why all the hostility about being ignored? I see every single post. Do I always have the time to reply to each and every one? No. I'm sorry for that.
Real life happens and look what the fuck I miss.
two important words there rw
SPRING BREAK
i have herd what you americans do in spring break.
naughty naughty
Whispers are loud as fuck inside your own fucking head.
i have herd what you americans do in spring break.
Ah, but I am not American, FS, I am Canadian. And truthfully, I did not have as much fun that week as I would have liked to :/
SDOCK!!!!
YAY!
You know, I just realized Mayo is kinda like the Dad that works out of town a lot. He swings by, yells "I'm home! Here's how my week went.."
Leaves the dirty clothes and grabs a Diet Coke and a pack of cigarettes on the way back out the door, yelling "Love ya! See you soon!"
Oh, well. Maybe when you get a vacation you can stay a little longer. See, some of the kids need braces and someone spilled something on the rug and the basement flooded a few days ago and...well, we won't go into that now.
Love you too!
But some of that laundry has got to be burned...
L.
Burying the hatchet? Sure I could help you do that and I could help find a good place to bury the body.
I live deep in the Georgia swamps, remember?
....sdock10 might be kidding or might not be
Can we use handcuffs on the defendant?
...just asking
sdock10 likes to play COPS
Manic much?
Fuck yes I am.
i do apologize rw. u still if you have sring break then you usually have naughtiness going on. hehehe
Mayo, Mayo are you still there?
Answer my questions if you dare.
Step right up and play my game
So that I might know your name.
Just answer me these questions three
And none will know save me and thee.
Did you ever win a bike?
What kind was it?
Where did you win it?
p.s. Intrigued?
Socky! Princess!! * H U G Z *
ANON!!! *glomp*
So honestly, who are you?
I've felt invisible too, and yet people tell me that I'm not. So tits up & out, okay? Join in a bit more. ^_^
I gott go eat, back later!
See, some of the kids need braces and someone spilled something on the rug and the basement flooded a few days ago and...well, we won't go into that now.
Oh, Dad's got that under control. He's building my castle, you know? It's going to be fan-tab-u-lous!
*princess just realized that using Dad was a little creepy. O_o
Oooo. Shit has just gotten interestingly interesting.
*sits with a bag of popcorn*
Nik@Nite!!!!
We wuv you!!!
Tits up and out? Hell yeah!
Uncle Mayo, Princess?
But does this make SS the Mum?
L.
Just answer me these questions three
What is your name?
What is your quest?
What is your favorite color?
Sis, you on? sent you en email OF DIRE IMPORTANCE. ;D
If Mayo won a bike, I am going to be so jealous. How fucking cool would that be? Pretty damn!
I ain't never won shit...
SS the mum?
Uhh, nooooooo!!!!
Mayo can be the not-really-your-Uncle-Uncle. Just a cool dude that is definitely part of the family.
SDock, I'll buy you a bike.
You want a basket on the front, too?
Fuck yes I want a basket and streamers on the handlebars.
Did I take crazy pills today?
Fuck no I didn't.
Maybe I need some...
Fuck no I don't.
Mayo, Mayo, Mayo...You are my drug of choice. Thanks for the refill.
What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
I knew I should have payed more attention in Physics class.
I dunno, Elena.
African or European Elena?
Elena said...
What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
What do you mean? An African or a European swallow?
lol i was waiting for that, elena!
you win! :D
Huh? I... I don't know that
Ahhhhhhhhh
Well, our anon is white and nerdy, we know that much.
Not like I should talk.
There you guys go again, quoting my fave comedy!
Elena, I love how you got the stutter and the inflection down in that quote! ^_^
Um, weird and at the same fuckin' time.
I'm with Elena.
What?
I've seen that movie way too many times!!!
what movie?
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
No wonder I'm lost.
I've never watched it.
Elena said...
I've seen that movie way too many times!!!
There simply is no such thing as seeing it too many times. ^_^
Mayo's Castle Anthrax FTW!
Mayo... are you wounded?
LOL just playin' wityoo man.
It's my favourite comedy ever, S&V!
Is this the right room for an argument?
pricess you and me both
go ahead tim
I fart in your general direction
Tim:
As long as it's civil, then certainly. :)
sdock10 goes to her corner to sit back and observe, notebook in hand.
Oh God not the rabbit....
So are there some who call you....Tim?
I wave my private parts at your aunties.
It's the right room for riddles, Tim. But only if ye be a man of valor!
Tim the Enchanter said...
Is this the right room for an argument?
I've told you once.
I wave my private parts at your aunties you cheesy lot of second hand electric donkey bottom-biters
you and all your silly English K-nig-hts.
Go away, anon. Or I shall taunt you a second time!
Go and boil your bottom you son of a silly person
I'm honestly gonna do this from memory, guys. Watch and be utterly impressed.
FOLLOW!
BUT!!
Follow only if ye be men of valor, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel, that no man yet has fought with it AND LIVED!
BONES of four-fifty men lie strewn about its lair! So, brave knights if you do doubt your courage, or your strength, come no further!
For DEATH awaits you all... with nasty big pointed teeth.
What an eccentric performance!
Is this the five minute argument or the full half hour?
You don't frighten us, English pig dogs.
I don't want to talk to you no more! You empty-headed animal food trough wiper!
Well, do you want to have just one argument, or were you thinking of taking a course?
Is this the five minute argument or the full half hour?
Oh, just the five minutes.
English bed-wetting types!
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries!
Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke! You vacuous, toffee-nosed, malodorous pervert!
Sdock?
You still here?
I'm French. Why do you think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king?
*looks up from corner and nods at Mustard*
Oh, oh, I see, running away then. You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!
The Tale of Brave Sir Robyn
Bravely bold Sir Robin Brought forth from Camelot. He was not afraid to die, Oh, brave Sir Robin! He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways. Brave, brave, brave Sir Robin. He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp. Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken! To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin. His head smashed in and his heart cut out, And his liver removed and his bowls unplugged, And his nostrils raked and his bottom burnt off, And his peni--
Robin: That's...That's, uh... That's enough music for now, lads. It looks like there's getting work afoot. Three headed knight: HALT!!! Voice over: YES!! It was the dreaded Three Headed Knight, the fiercest creature for *yards* around! For second.... after second..., Robin held his own, but the onslaught proved too much for the brave knight. Scarcely was his armor damp, when Robin suddenly, dramatically, changed his tactics!
Minstrel: Robin: Brave Sir Robin ran away. No! Bravely ran away away.... I didn't! When Danger reared its ugly head, He bravely turned his tail and fled No!! Yes brave Sir Robin turned about I didn't! And gallantly chickened out.. Bravely bravely bravely bravely I never did! Bravely bravely bravely bravely All lies! Bravely bravely brave Sir Robin! I never!
---
You okay, Sdock?
What are you doodling?
First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out.
Shoots, anon, I know that one by heart, too. Sing it at work sometimes.
*high fives*
Mustard,
I can't tell. I'm lost and I don't know if I'm on the inside or outside or in limbo.
Can't focus.
Feel me?
Just scribbling...mainly circles round and round and round. Spirals..downward.
Well Mayonaise, fortunately for me I had aced Business Law a while ago. Allow me to put my theory to the test. According to the title of the new post, it appears that the situation you have with the ghost may possible be coming to a close. Possibly on good terms I suppose, but at this point, nothing is certain. Correct?
To me I see you standing as the defendant while the ghost is the prosecution. Are you deliberating your constitutional rights? Remember that the Fifth Amendment states that you can excercise your right to not speak. The prosecution can decide whether to charge you with a misdemeanor, which is a less serious charge such as battery, or a felony, which is considered to be a much serious charge.
I am going to assume that one's behavior is coming to light here, and that the prosecution has brought new evidence in order to support that claim.
As far as the jury is concerned, all twelve jury members must decide whether the defendent is deem innocent or guilty. If one of them does not come to the same conclusion as the others, the judge can decide to throw the case out or declare a mistrial, but it seems that the twelve members have come to the same conclusion. That you are the guilty party.
an injunction is basically a court order where they can prohibit a party from performing an action.
Apologies for the law lesson, but I thought it'd be fun to explain it. Hello everyone!
Make those spirals go up, oh roped one.
I'm in limbo a lot. MissT hoped that I would get out, but no such luck.
You know how some days we have such pervasive thoughts that we can't do anything with them but spit them at each other? Today's not that day for me, and sometimes when I have these days, it makes me think something's wrong.
I don't feel much of anything today. Homeostasis, I suppose. It's not bad bad, but it could always be better, ya know?
Bring out your dead.
Mustard,
I am feeling too much today and I can't tell where it's all coming from....me, myself, and I? I just don't fucking know. I hate feeling like this...I find myself staring into space and my leg shaking. Must keep moving...gotta let it out somehow. But I can't find the words....Damnit!
elena, i'm forced to follow you around worshipfully now, just so's you know. the holy hand grenade instructions you quoted are my absolute favorite moment in the movie.
*gazes adoringly*
Thanks Toujours... I always laugh at "Five is right out there."
Hello there squeak squeak, elena, sd10, everyone else. How are you guys?
sdock10 said...
ch today and I can't tell where it's all coming from....me, myself, and I? I just don't fucking know. I hate feeling like this...I find myself staring into space and my leg shaking. Must keep moving...gotta let it out somehow. But I can't find the words....Damnit!
Girl, you need an outlet. No, I don't mean like an electrical one, but like, you know! An outlet. Somewhere to release all that frustration.
Sorry Mustard and sdock. I'll stop quoting the movie. What's wrong?
Pontius Pilate: So, yaw fatha was a Woman? Who was he?
Brian: He was a Centurion, in the Jerusalem Garrisons.
Pontius Pilate: Weally? What was his name?
Brian: 'Naughtius Maximus'.
[the Centurion laughs]
Pontius Pilate: Centuwion, do we have anyone of that name in the gawwison?
Centurion: Well, no, sir.
Pontius Pilate: Well, you sound vewy sure. Have you checked?
Centurion: Well, no, sir. Umm, I think it's a joke, sir... like, uh, 'Sillius Soddus' or... 'Biggus Dickus', sir.
Pontius Pilate: [guard chuckles] What's so funny about "Biggus Dickus? "
Centurion: Well, it's a joke name, sir.
Pontius Pilate: I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'.
[guard chuckles]
Pontius Pilate: Silence! What is all this insolence? You will find yourself in gladiator school vewy quickly with wotten behaviour like that.
Brian: Can I go now, sir?
[slap]
Brian: Aaah! Eh.
Pontius Pilate: Wait till Biggus Dickus hears of this!
[guard chuckles]
Pontius Pilate: Wight! Take him away!
Centurion: Oh, sir, he - he only...
Pontius Pilate: No, no. I want him fighting wabid, wild animals within a week.
Centurion: Yes, sir. Come on, you.
[takes the guard away as continues laughing histerically]
Pontius Pilate: I will not have my fwiends widiculed by the common soldiewy. - - Anybody else feel like a little... giggle... when I mention my fwiend... Biggus...
[another guard chuckles]
Pontius Pilate: ... Dickus?
[more chuckling]
Pontius Pilate: What about you? Do you find it... wisible... when I say the name... 'Biggus'...
[chuckle]
Pontius Pilate: ... Dickus?
[both guards chuckle]
Pontius Pilate: He has a wife, you know. You know what she's called? She's called... 'Incontinentia'... Incontinentia Buttocks
Pontius Pilate: [Guards are laughing] Stop! What is all this?
Pontius Pilate: [Laughing continues] I've had enough of this wowdy webel sniggewing behaviour. Silence! Call yourselves Pwaetowian guards? You're not - Seize him! Seize him! Blow your noses and seize him!
Hey BC
Tim....It was fun!
I'm turning in for the night. Have a good one, everyone :)
Life of Brian....
Not quite as good as Holy Grail but it has its moments.
I can't even tell you how many times I wanted to pull out that Biggus Dickus conversation when SS used to post in Latin. ^_^
night RW
hello bc, and good night resurrected wreck. ^.^
Thanks Toujours... I always laugh at "Five is right out there."
me too! :D
there used to be an sca group that incorporated that whole bit into their baronial court. lol
I can't even tell you how many times I wanted to pull out that Biggus Dickus
I can't stop laughing.....
Toujours I've spent too much time at the Renascence Festival
Sdock?
Why don't you go find the darkest, innermost corner of your home and scream? Seriously.
Come back and tell us, in as many words as you can muster, what you're feeling. That may get the ball rolling on your release.
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